Lyra Parish - Weak for Him

His rock-hard manhood wanted me, and I wanted it. He straddled on top of me, and I could feel the tip of him close to the outside of me. I wanted him in me.

My breaths went ragged as he sucked in air and positioned his body closer to mine. I ran my fingers through his hair, and smiled, and whispered between heavy breathing as I looked into his beautiful blue eyes.

"Fuck me, Luke. Make me yours."

And then the door slammed open.

" Get the fuck off of her," Finnley yelled.

Luke rolled off of me, and I sat up in bed like a prairie dog peeking out of the hole.

Dark green eyes stared into mine and anger filled me.

"What the hell, Finnley!" I yelled back at him.

"Come here, Jennifer."

"No. Fuck you," I said.

Finnley walked to me, grabbed me by the arm, and pulled me to the door.

"Get your fucking clothes on, now. We're leaving."

"No. I don't want to leave. I'm in the middle of fucking something."

"I thought it was quite obvious that you will not be fucking something tonight. If I tell you to do something, you will obey, and if you don't, then you will wish you did. Now get fucking dressed."

I pulled my arm back as hard as I could, but his grasp was too tight. I couldn't break free and knew I would bruise. Like shackles, he kept hold of me, and even if I wanted to escape, I couldn't.

Luke didn't care to cover himself on the bed, but instead gave a sinister smile and placed his hands behind his head.

Finn placed his hand behind my head, put his mouth close to my ear, and whispered, "No fucking way I am going to lose you to this bastard. You are mine , Jennifer. I don't feel like sharing my secret recipe."

That day in the kitchen flashed through my mind and the memories replayed. I knew there was no arguing with Finnley, not when a business decision was in play, so I angrily moved to the bathroom and dressed.

I cussed him the entire time.

Finally, when I had fully accepted giving myself to Luke, begged for it, even, was when Finn decided to not agree? He had months to make up his mind, and fucking Nancy to fuck. I had Luke. We were finished.

Luke would have been gentle with me.

He would care for me afterward.

He would make sure that everything was okay as he placed my virginity into his pocket. Instead of wearing it as a badge on his chest, he would have locked it away and treasured the moment. Maybe even paint a picture for the world to see.

I wasn't a cheap whore to Luke, or someone that he could fuck and leave. I meant something to him, and each time I looked into his eyes, I knew that. Every time we shared a joke, I knew that it meant more than just my virginity to him. Was it love? I didn't know, but the idea of him loving me comforted me.

The high heels fit snug on my feet. I ripped them off, and walked barefoot to the door where Finn waited. I breezed past him, and went back to Luke, who stood at the bottom of the stairs with plaid pajama bottoms. I opened my arms and tucked my body into his.

"You're fucking beautiful. We will have our time in Paris," he whispered into my ear.

Each tingle exploded on my arms as his lips lightly brushed the side of my neck. His hands rubbed circles on my back, then found their way to my hair. I felt like I was his.

"You never told me about the key."

"It's the key to my heart. I had it tattooed because you've already got it."

I looked into Luke's eyes. He titled his head and moved close to me. As if Finn wasn't there, our tongues danced while our hands rustled through hair. We even exchanged cute, little nibbles of lips. We couldn't keep our hands off of one another. Oh god, I want him.

"Paris," I whispered.

When I finally managed to pull away, I continued my way past Finnley, who looked even more pissed than before, and walked outside. No hostility, no anger, just slight agitation fueled me. I had the key to Luke's heart, and it was the only thing that kept me calm. I was experiencing the calm before the storm.

V sat in front of the house, her paint dark and luminous. I opened the door, and shut myself inside as I stared forward into the darkness.

When I was a child, I would give everyone the silent treatment when I was mad. My mother said it was my father's stubbornness, but I didn't care. I knew that if I spoke when my anger level was close to a ten, I would say things I regretted. Things that I would never be able to take back, so instead of eating my words later, I swallowed them. Some habits and character traits will never die no matter how much a person changes.

Finn slid into the driver's side and started V with a vengeance.

The engine rumbled, and he burned rubber when we pulled off. Way to be an asshole, I thought.

My mind wandered as we drove down the long country road. I thought of my best friend, and Luke. I thought of my childhood cat and how she used to sleep between my legs when I was a kid. Then my thoughts went darker, and I thought about my parent's funeral and the house that I sold to run away from my anguish.

Finnley spoke to me, but I tuned him out, never really listening to a word he said. The way he barged in while I was in the middle of one of the most intimate moments of my life was unforgivable. But then again, did I have a right to be pissed? I was Finn's, after all.

My thoughts continued to wander on. They swooped into memories I had long forgotten, and they were interwoven with new memories of fancy dinners and designer clothes. High heel shoes and beautiful lingerie, and closets full of every piece of fabric I could imagine. My life had become something that I wasn't. I had become someone I didn't know anymore.

I sucked in deep breaths and exhaled long sighs, hoping the movement of air in my lungs would calm the burning anger.

The stars across the desert seemed to shine like bright diamonds. I could see the silhouettes of cactus line the streets, and watched the dust in our wake as we sped forward. The engine growled and purred, coaxing me calm, pulling me back to reality and away from dangerous thoughts. I closed my eyes and rested my head on the seat.

We pulled into the driveway, and I stared at the house that had become my home. Finn didn't look at me as he opened the door, and slammed it. Confusion coated me. I did nothing. He had no right to be pissed off at me. And with that, my rage went to an unknown level.

He had his woman.

He went on ski trips with Nancy, and fancy dinners, and brought her to business parties, and red carpet affairs.

Nancy, Nancy, Nancy, the name that seemed to show up everywhere.

The woman that all the Girls believed Finn would marry.

Nancy: the blonde bombshell that made Finn the happiest man alive.

What the hell did he want with me?

Everyone had gone for the evening and the house was quiet. Some of the girls took vacations with their Number Ones, and the others took time off to visit their family.

If I could have slept, I would have, but I couldn't. My emotions were reeling, and I had to clear my mind before I landed in a dark place of resentment.

I went to the patio. Winter was quickly approaching, and the grass seemed crispier under my bare feet. The stars above twinkled, but it was different than in Texas. The sky seemed to be darker, bigger, and stretch on for miles in Vegas like the city streets.

The lawn chair, although the fabric was cold beneath my legs, held me like a cocoon. The cold air brushed my skin, and I shivered, but didn't leave. I wanted to burn the images of Luke washing my naked body in my mind forever. I wanted to memorize the look on Finnley's face when Luke hovered above me kissing my neck, being so close to making me his own. Just one long thrust and he would have been completely inside me, and I no longer would be a virgin.