Erin Leaf: The First Time is the Sweetest

“Are you sure you’re going to be all right, honey?” her dad asked. Sabrina sighed with exasperation, despite the lovely sunny day.

“I’m a big girl now, Dad, you know that. And I’ve got a lot of photography projects planned, so it’s not like I’ll be bored. I’m going to be fine, and you know you’ve been planning this trip for a long time,” she assured him as she inhaled deeply, enjoying the flower-scented air. “Besides, you need the time off. I know how stressed you’ve been lately, especially with the extra charity cases you’ve been taking on. You need time to relax and not worry about the things you can’t fix.” She smiled as she waited for him to get into the taxi. Sabrina loved him dearly, but she couldn’t wait for him to go. She knew she’d miss him, especially since this was her last summer at home before grad school, but even so, she felt a trickle of excitement as she watched him fuss with his bag. Then he hesitated. She looked at his face and realized he was trying to be stoic about leaving.

“Oh shoot,” she heard him murmur softly. She watched him try to wipe his eyes surreptitiously.

“Dad!” she exclaimed. “No crying! You promised!” She shook her head at him. He laughed and hugged her one last time.

“Don’t forget, Jimmy’s here. I’ll be fine,” Sabrina insisted, holding him tightly. He nodded and stepped back, trying to smile at her. She thought about Jimmy. She hadn’t seen him in years. He used to live with his father Charlie next door, but by the time Charlie died, Jimmy was already in college. Sabrina knew her dad kept in touch with Jimmy, but even so, she never expected him to ask Jimmy to come stay with her this summer. Sabrina sighed. She wished her dad didn’t have to set up a babysitter for her, but some of the recent work he’d taken on was dangerous. As an attorney, he was dealing with more and more gang-related crime at his practice, helping abused members escape gangs through legal avenues. She knew he wouldn’t be able to relax on this vacation unless he could be sure she was safe.

Sabrina remembered playing with Jimmy when she was younger. They’d always gotten along great even though he was five years older. And it doesn’t hurt that he’s drop-dead gorgeous , she thought, hoping no one could see her blush. Sabrina had always had a crush on him, but he never teased her despite the way she followed him around, stammering whenever he spoke to her. She shook herself, reaching down to help her dad stuff the last bag in the car, absentmindedly hooking a strand of hair behind her ear. She handed her dad his coffee and tried to convince herself that her red face was due to the heat. Idiot!

“Sabrina, are you sure you’re going to be okay?” Her dad paused by the open cab door. He must have noticed my red face , Sabrina thought absently, still trying to control her blush.

She nodded and smiled at her dad, kissing his cheek. “I’m going to be fine, Dad,” she assured him as she thought about what a whole summer with Jimmy would be like. As a freelance journalist, he didn’t really have what other people would consider a “steady” job, and he traveled most of the year. She hadn’t talked to him in years, and she was really looking forward to the next few months, getting to know him as an adult, not a kid. It would be the longest time they’d ever spent together. Her dad pulled back and searched her face. She reached out and tugged at his collar, pretending to smooth out a wrinkle but actually twisting the collar up. She’d pulled this trick on him a thousand times, and she giggled as he tried to fix his collar and hug her at the same time.

“All right.” Her dad laughed as he pulled away and straightened his shirt. His face portrayed an endearing mix of amusement and exasperation. He was really a sweet man. Sabrina smiled at him, and he winked. She knew she’d miss him, miss the feeling of home and safety and everything else a father meant, but she was anxious to stretch her wings and become her own person.

“Have a good time!” she whispered fiercely into his hair, hugging him one last time. “I love you, Dad.”

“I love you, too, munchkin. And be nice to Jimmy!” he admonished, giving her a last, quick hug. He stepped back and settled into the car.

“Oh, she’ll be nice to me,” Jimmy’s deep voice teased from behind as the car door shut. Her dad smiled as she jumped, not realizing Jimmy had come out of the house. Sabrina loved the dark, rumbly tone of his voice, loved the hint of amusement that often hovered suggestively on the edge of his words, teasing the unwary. She felt herself flush again. Damn this ridiculous skin! she thought, impatiently pushing her hair back. She loved the color but hated how the natural red also came with absurdly fair skin prone to blushes.

“Then make sure you’re nice to Sabrina!” her dad called from inside the car. Sabrina could tell her dad was laughing and rolled her eyes.

“I’m always nice to Sabrina,” Jimmy retorted, and Sabrina snorted. He smirked, and she shook her head at him, pretending to be offended. He laughed, and she gave up trying to look stern as her father waved from the taxi and it pulled away from the curb. She stood on the sidewalk, waving until the car turned the corner, then turned and smiled at Jimmy.

“I thought he’d never actually leave,” Jimmy said, his mouth turning up in a crooked grin as they walked up the tree-lined driveway to the house. His hand rested on her waist, guiding her up the steps to the front door.

“Me, too!” Sabrina shivered, acutely aware of the warmth of his hand. She wished he could see she was all grown up but knew he didn’t. She sighed quietly to herself. Maybe she could be his friend, but she knew better than to hope for something more. The trees shook their leaves at her, and she relaxed as a breeze ruffled her hair. Enough with the self-pity! She gave herself a mental shake. Jimmy’s here for the summer, and you’re finally free of the hell that is adolescence.

“So, what are we going to do about dinner?” Jimmy asked as they stepped inside the cool foyer of the house. To their left lay the dining room and kitchen, while directly in front, the stairs to the second floor curved along the wall. Her dad’s den sat along the right, and the living room was at the back of the house.

Sabrina headed directly toward the stairs. She wanted to change because she was sticky and hot. From the heat , she thought, smiling as she lied to herself, amused with her ability to prevaricate. “I have no idea what we’ve got to eat. Why don’t you surprise me?” Sabrina glanced at Jimmy as she started up the stairs. What the—was he staring at my butt? No way. She shook herself. “I’ll be right down after I change. I’ve gotta get out of these hot jeans. I’d no idea that it was going to get this warm in June.” As she ascended the stairs, Sabrina thought she heard him mutter something about her being hot, but when she turned around he smiled innocently up at her. She narrowed her eyes at him, but he just laughed. Get a hold of yourself, girl! He’s not looking at you that way!

“Didn’t I tell you to put on something cooler this morning?” he nagged as Sabrina glared, running his hands along his shorts as if to say, Look here! He stood at the bottom in his cutoffs and a T-shirt, looking delicious and not the least bit overheated. Her eyes went to where his short dark hair stood on end from where he must have run his hands through it, brown eyes laughing.