J. Gonzalez - Survivor

In the weeks that had followed the discovery of Animal and Tim Murray's bodies, more revelations were unveiled. Rick Shectman had been brought in for questioning and he'd denied everything. While Shectman was in jail being held on other charges, one of William Grecko's contacts, who had been quietly working the extreme hardcore S&M angle, came back and revealed more pieces of the puzzle, confirming the disjointed confession Frank gave before he blew his brains out. According to the informant, Frank Miller had been a longtime devotee of the circle. He was known as a voyeur. "It's like he told me: He liked to watch," Billy had told Brad six months later at a small bar in Huntington Beach. "He especially liked watching women get cut with knives or burned with cigarettes or branding irons. He was into what is known as blood sports. It's like… people getting off sexually at the sight of blood or getting off in the act of cutting or mutilating people."

"My mom's doing pretty good," Brad continued, the first hint of a smile breaking his stoic features. "She's… she's actually starting to have a life again. It was hard for her-you remember that. It was hard for all of us. But she's finally been able to put it behind her." He shook his head. "It's weird to hear me say that. When I think back, I realize she's been getting her shit together far longer than I have. She bounced back pretty quickly, actually. I guess the fact that she's seeing somebody made me realize that she's gone on with her life." He looked at Lisa's headstone. "You d like him, Lisa. His name's Robert Walker and he's a writer and a musician. Total opposite of what Frank was. Brad still couldn't refer to the man that had fathered him as Dad.

At some point during the nine months Brad and Lisa spent in therapy, recovering physically and mentally from the ordeal, William Grecko had come to the house and, with Joan Miller present, he'd told them everything; he'd kept most of what Frank told him a secret from them, but that day he told them all of it, including the corroborating evidence his investigator uncovered. How the S&M acquaintance had revealed that Frank liked to watch people being sexually tortured and abused; how he had fantasized similar scenarios with his daughter-in-law in mind. Telling them the truth about Frank's sickness was the hardest thing he had ever done. Joan had reacted visibly to the news. "I'm sorry," Billy had said while Joan cried.

'You'd realty be surprised if you saw Mom now, Lisa," Brad said. "She's… well, she really shines now. You'd be happy for her."

He remembered how Lisa had reacted two months after she had come home from the hospital, when Billy told them that cadaver-sniffing dogs had located the remains of Debbie Martinez, and Amanda and Alicia Stevens. DNA evidence found on the bodies matched with Jeff Sheer-Animal-pointing to him as the killer. Unfortunately, Lisa's testimony wasn't enough to have Rick Shectman arrested for murder. There was no record that he was involved with Frank Miller. Phone records showed Rick had frequent contact with Tim Murray, who, in turn, had contact with Jeff Sheer. But there was no evidence of Jeff and Rick ever coming in contact with each other. Al Pressman was never located. William surmised he either disappeared on his own or was bumped off.

Lisa took solace in taking care of Alicia and Amanda Stevens. After Alicia's father was informed of his daughter's death and he refused to have her body shipped to him, Lisa had arranged for the woman and her daughter to be cremated. She'd also arranged a small ceremony. She had broken down and wept at the service, and Brad could only allow her this time to grieve. Lisa's grief had been a great release, mourning for a woman and child whose deaths she felt responsible for. Her taking care of them after death and seeing that they were honored and remembered in a memorial service was her way of making it up to them, however small it was.

Lisa bought the plots herself, at Forest Hills Cemetery in Laguna Beach. She visited the grave sites regularly for a while. Brad visited them with her too, and could only feel a sense of numbness as he sat beside Lisa while she cried, her grief still great and immense. He understood where it was coming from, but he could not share her grief at that time; he had his own turbulence to go through: the betrayal of his father.

Brad rocked forward a little, a light breeze ruffling his hair, which he'd allowed to grow longish. "So much has happened in the past six months. You already know that Elizabeth and I have gotten married. I told you about that a year ago, right on the eve of our wedding. I'd hardly think you'd forget that. I was bawling like a damn baby when I told you."

He had met Elizabeth Robles in Santa Fe, New Mexico, where he had stayed with an old college friend during his two-year ramble around the greater North American continent. Following Lisa's passing, he'd come dangerously close to following in her footsteps. He'd spent two months in a drug and alcohol fog until he'd pulled himself out of it with William Grecko's help. William had gone into rehab six months after Lisa was discharged from the hospital-his sixth stint in twenty-five years-and he'd emerged not only sober but with a sense of triumph, an outlook that he admitted was one he never thought he'd have. "I'm not going down that road again, buddy," Billy had told him. "From now on, I'm choosing life"

William had helped Brad make that choice nine months later, when Brad realized that Lisa's choice had been that: her choice. It had been a hard one to make, but he really couldn't see her taking the alternative. "She would've been a mess for the rest of her life," he told Billy later after an AA meeting, which Brad began attending for a while and later dropped out of. He'd never had an addiction problem previously, and the meetings had merely been a form of support for him following his own rehabilitation and therapy. More therapeutic were his private meetings with Billy, which the two lawyers had at least weekly. And when Brad was on the road on one of his rambles, he always talked to William via cell phone or through letters, which he posted in whichever town he was in-from Anchorage to Belize. By then, Brad had quit his position with Jacob's and Meyers and was living off of the money that had been recovered during the theft of their life savings. He knew he would have to return to work eventually, but for a time he couldn't. He had to find himself, had to find peace, and the only way he could do that was to stay in motion. His travels by car were wide-ranging and in some cases adventurous, and in seeing the natural beauty of the country he began to feel beauty again in life.

But it was a long, slow process. And there were setbacks along the way. More than once, Brad had gasped awake in some strange hotel room in some state he had never been in, alone, the memory of Lisa's voice, her touch on his mind, and he would collapse in uncontrollable sobs.

"We're doing very well, Brad said, feeling in touch now with Lisa's spirit. "We finally sold the house. Can you believe I was able to sell it for almost half a million? I mean, we paid two seventy-five for it when we bought it, and five years later I get double for it. Elizabeth and I were able to get a nice home outside of Santa Fe, where we live now. You'd love it, Lisa. Ave bedrooms, on two acres of land, with a little lake in the back. I mean, it's a gorgeous house! Easily a two-million-dollar home in Orange County. And I paid three-fifty for it. A steal'

Officially, the FBI had kept the case quiet. With Lisa's testimony they began monitoring Rick Shectman more closely. And when he was finally caught in an undercover sting operation involving a worldwide child pornography ring two years later, he was brought up and convicted on various charges that resulted in a life sentence. Brad regretted that Lisa never lived long enough to see that happen.