Simon Green - Live and let Drood

Dad? said the Armourer. His mouth worked for a moment, as though he couldn t figure out what to say. And then he plunged forward and hugged the Regent close. It did look a bit odd from the outside. There was a lot of hugging going on today, and we re really not a touchy-feely kind of family on the whole. The Armourer finally let the Regent go and held him at arm s length so he could look him over properly.

It s been such a long time, Dad! I did my best to keep in touch, but it hasn t been easy. I did think you might come home again when Mum died.

It would only have complicated things, said the Regent. At a time when you really didn t need distractions.

You re looking great! said the Armourer.

I told you that serum would work.

And then he finally looked past the Regent, at Patrick and Diana, and his whole face just shut down, as though it didn t know what to do. He looked blankly at them, and they just looked quietly back.

I can t believe you re here, the Armourer said finally. I can t believe you ve come back at last. He broke off, looked at me and then back at the Regent. You haven t told him, have you? Why haven t you told him? He has a right to know!

Because it isn t the right time, the Regent said firmly. Far too much going on right now. He doesn t need to be distracted.

I ll decide what I need to know and when I need to know it, I said just as firmly. What s going on here?

I will tell you everything once this mess is over, said the Regent. I give you my word.

The Armourer frowned at Patrick and Diana and then nodded slowly.

He s right, Eddie. You need to focus on what s in front of you. We all do. Just trust us. For now.

All right, I said. For now. Talk to me about what s happening here.

We ve been working on Alpha Red Alpha nonstop, ever since the bloody thing started up for no reason and dumped us here, said the Armourer, giving the dimensional engine his best There s going to be trouble scowl. Power levels are fine. Everything s doing what I think it should be doing, but

You don t have the proper return coordinates, I said. I ran quickly through what Crow Lee had done and handed over the remote control and the Merlin Glass. The Armourer gave the remote a quick look and then handed it off to a hovering lab assistant, who hurried off with it. The Armourer scowled thoughtfully. There s a lot of useful information to be found in that thing, no doubt, but this Eddie, this isn t the Merlin Glass I gave you. I know that for a fact, because the original Merlin Glass is still lying on a bench up there in the Armoury, cracked from top to bottom and waiting for me to do something about it. This is a whole new Merlin Glass. Where did you get it?

It s from another Drood Hall, from another reality. Long story you really don t need to know for now. But this Glass can do anything the old one can, and then some. It should be able to point the way home for Alpha Red Alpha. It s very eager to please.

Not necessarily a good thing, with anything made by Merlin Satanspawn, sniffed the Armourer. But never look a gift whore in the mouth.

Language, Jack! said the Regent.

Sorry, Dad, said the Armourer. But you re right, Eddie. Let me work on the Glass. If you and the rest of the family can just keep the monsters at bay for a little while longer till I can get this heap of junk working Yes, I m talking about you, you oversized egg timer! Don t think I don t know you re listening!

We left him to it and went back up into the Hall. Which might have been under attack by an army of nightmarish monsters, but was still less disturbing than the cavern below.

Back in the main hallway, we all crowded together in the open front doors, looking out into the clearing. The monsters were pressing closer than ever to the Hall. The shimmering barrier that contained the Earth-normal conditions had been forced back right across the clearing and was now only a few yards away. The creatures seemed bigger and madder and more determined than ever, rising to fill the sky with huge slabs of angry shapes. The armoured Droods defending the perimeter had been pushed back, too, till they were only just outside the Hall. They were hitting the monsters with everything they had, but even the combined clamour of all their weapons was nothing compared to the howls and screams and roars of the massed monsters.

According to some short-range scanners the Armourer rigged up for me, the Sarjeant-at-Arms said tightly, these creatures give off dangerous radiations and toxic emissions. As if they weren t ugly enough already. Together, just their presence is enough to overwhelm our poor Earth-normal conditions. The monsters have been pushing the barrier hard, and it can t stand against them much longer. Soon enough the clearing will be full of those monsters, and we ll have to fight from inside the Hall.

Could they push the barrier back inside the Hall? I said. Push their world s conditions in here with us?

I don t know, said the Sarjeant. The Hall has all kinds of protections, but most of them don t seem to work here. As though we re so far from our own reality that even the laws of physics are different.

Where are the Librarian and Ammonia Vom Acht? I said.

Planning some kind of psychic attack, said the Sarjeant-at-Arms, making clear what he thought of that idea with a very expressive upraised eyebrow. It s a sign of how desperate our situation is that I ve encouraged them to try. It keeps them out of the way.

Just how desperate is this situation? said Molly, peering out the door while tapping one finger idly against her silver torc.

We ve had to ground all our air forces, said the Sarjeant. The skies were getting too crowded. All that s protecting us from death from above are the gun emplacements on the roof. And just like everyone else, they re running out of ammunition. It s been centuries since we had to withstand a siege; we re just not prepared. A lesson for the Future, if there is a Future. Any idea how long it ll be before the Armourer can fire up Alpha Red Alpha and get us out of this hellhole?

He didn t say, I said.

Of course he didn t. He never does.

Pushed back by the monsters, their backs set against the front of the Hall, golden-armoured figures stood side by side, firing every kind of gun I d ever seen. Doing remarkable amounts of damage to the walls of flesh before them, but not enough to stop or even slow them. Vicious steaming fluids fell down to splash across the golden armour, only to fall harmlessly away. The stench drifting in through the doorway was unbelievably vile. I wondered if I should raise the question of the Armageddon Codex with the Sarjeant-at-Arms. He d noticed I was carrying Oath Breaker, but he hadn t said anything. I wasn t looking forward to explaining to him just who had taken the ironwood staff in the first place.

He didn t need to know about the Original Traitor for now.

And then we all jumped and cried out as the shimmering screen slammed back several feet to right inside the hallway. We all fell back from the open doors as harsh air and heavy gravity filled the doorway. The Sarjeant yelled for all the Droods on the perimeter to get back inside, and they lowered their weapons and ran for it. Many of them threw themselves through the open windows, rather than get caught in the crush at the doors. Patrick and Diana each got a chair to stand on and calmly laid down covering fire over the Droods heads to discourage the advancing monsters. I looked across at the Regent, who just shook his head sadly.

Sorry, Eddie. Lateral thinking and tricks of the trade are fine against my usual enemies, but this is all a bit beyond me.

Ethel? I said.

Yes, Eddie, the disembodied voice said immediately. I m right here.

The elderly gentleman here is my grandfather Arthur. I say he is a Drood in good standing once more, so please be so kind as to grant him his armour again.