Joanne Rowling: Harry Potter and the Cursed Child

ALBUS walks quickly along the train.

ROSE: Albus, I’ve been looking for you . . .

ALBUS: Me? Why?

ROSE isn’t sure how to phrase what she has to say.

ROSE: Albus, it’s the start of the fourth year, and so the start of a new year for us. I want to be friends again.

ALBUS: We never were friends.

ROSE: That’s harsh! You were my best friend when I was six!

ALBUS: That was a long time ago.

He makes to walk away. She pulls him into an empty compartment.

ROSE: Have you heard the rumors? Big Ministry raid a few days ago. Your dad apparently was incredibly brave.

ALBUS: How do you always know about these things and I don’t?

ROSE: Apparently he — the wizard they raided — Theodore Nott, I think — had all sorts of artifacts that broke all sorts of laws including — and this has got them all gooey — an illegal Time-Turner. And quite a superior one at that.

ALBUS looks at ROSE, everything falling into place.

ALBUS: A Time-Turner? Dad found a Time-Turner?

ROSE: Shh! Yes. I know. Great, right?

ALBUS: You’re sure.

ROSE: Entirely.

ALBUS: Now I have to find Scorpius.

He walks down the train. ROSE follows, still determined to say her piece.

ROSE: Albus!

ALBUS turns decisively.

ALBUS: Who’s told you that you have to talk to me?

ROSE (sprung) : Okay, maybe your mum owled my dad — but only because she’s worried about you. And I just think —

ALBUS: Leave me alone, Rose.

SCORPIUS is sitting in his usual compartment. ALBUS enters first, ROSE still tailing him.

SCORPIUS: Albus! Oh hello, Rose, what do you smell of?

ROSE: What do I smell of?

SCORPIUS: No, I meant it as a nice thing, you smell like a mixture of fresh flowers and fresh — bread.

ROSE: Albus, I’m here, okay? If you need me.

SCORPIUS: I mean, nice bread, good bread, bread . . . what’s wrong with bread?

ROSE walks away, shaking her head.

ROSE: What’s wrong with bread!

ALBUS: I’ve been looking for you everywhere . . .

SCORPIUS: And now you’ve found me. Ta-da! I was hardly hiding. You know how I like to — get on early. Stops people staring. Shouting. Writing “son of Voldemort” on my trunk. That one never gets old. She really doesn’t like me, does she?

ALBUS hugs his friend. With fierceness. They hold for a beat. SCORPIUS is surprised by this.

Okay. Hello. Um. Have we hugged before? Do we hug?

The two boys awkwardly dislocate.

ALBUS: Just a slightly weird twenty-four hours.

SCORPIUS: What’s happened in them?

ALBUS: I’ll explain later. We have to get off this train.

There’s the sound of whistles from off. The train starts moving.

SCORPIUS: Too late. The train is moving. Hogwarts ahoy!

ALBUS: Then we have to get off a moving train.

TROLLEY WITCH: Anything from the trolley, dears?

ALBUS opens a window and makes to climb out.

SCORPIUS: A moving magical train.

TROLLEY WITCH: Pumpkin Pasty? Cauldron Cake?

SCORPIUS: Albus Severus Potter, get that strange look out of your eye.

ALBUS: First question. What do you know about the Triwizard Tournament?

SCORPIUS (happy) : Ooooh, a quiz! Three schools pick three champions to compete in three tasks for one Cup. What’s that got to do with anything?

ALBUS: You really are an enormous geek, you know that?

SCORPIUS: Ya-huh.

ALBUS: Second question. Why has the Triwizard Tournament not been run in over twenty years?

SCORPIUS: The last competition included your dad and a boy called Cedric Diggory — they decided to win together but the Cup was a Portkey — and they were transported to Voldemort. Cedric was killed. They canceled the competition immediately after.

ALBUS: Good. Third question: Did Cedric need to be killed? Easy question, easy answer: No. The words Voldemort said were “Kill the spare.” The spare. He died only because he was with my father and my father couldn’t save him — we can. A mistake has been made and we’re going to right it. We’re going to use a Time-Turner. We’re going to bring him back.

SCORPIUS: Albus, for obvious reasons, I’m not a massive fan of Time-Turners . . .

ALBUS: When Amos Diggory asked for the Time-Turner my father denied they even existed. He lied to an old man who just wanted his son back — who just loved his son. And he did it because he didn’t care — because he doesn’t care. Everyone talks about all the brave things Dad did. But he made some mistakes too. Some big mistakes, in fact. I want to set one of those mistakes right. I want us to save Cedric.

SCORPIUS: Okay, whatever was holding your brain together seems to have snapped.

ALBUS: I’m going to do this, Scorpius. I need to do this. And you know as well as I do, I’ll entirely mess it up if you don’t come with me. Come on.

He grins. And then disappears ever up. SCORPIUS hesitates for a moment. He makes a face. And then hoists himself up and disappears after ALBUS.

The wind whistles from all angles and it’s a fierce wind at that.

SCORPIUS: Okay, now we’re on the roof of a train, it’s fast, it’s scary, this has been great, I feel like I’ve learnt a lot about me, something about you, but —

ALBUS: As I calculate it we should be approaching the viaduct soon and then it’ll be a short hike to St. Oswald’s Home for Old Witches and Wizards . . .

SCORPIUS: The what? The where? Look, I am as excited as you are to be a rebel for the first time in my life — yay — train roof — fun — but now — oh.

SCORPIUS sees something he doesn’t want to see.

ALBUS: The water will be an extremely useful backup if our Cushioning Charm doesn’t work.

SCORPIUS: Albus. The Trolley Witch.

ALBUS: You want a snack for the journey?

SCORPIUS: No. Albus. The Trolley Witch is coming towards us.

ALBUS: No, she can’t be, we’re on top of the train . . .

SCORPIUS points ALBUS in the right direction, and now he can see the TROLLEY WITCH, who approaches nonchalantly, pushing her trolley.

TROLLEY WITCH: Anything from the trolley, dears? Pumpkin Pasty? Chocolate Frog? Cauldron Cake?

ALBUS: Oh.

TROLLEY WITCH: People don’t know much about me. They buy my Cauldron Cakes — but they never really notice me. I don’t remember the last time someone asked my name.

ALBUS: What is your name?

TROLLEY WITCH: I’ve forgotten. All I can tell you is that when the Hogwarts Express first came to be — Ottaline Gambol herself offered me this job . . .

SCORPIUS: That’s — one hundred and ninety years. You’ve been doing this job for one hundred and ninety years?

TROLLEY WITCH: These hands have made over six million Pumpkin Pasties. I’ve got quite good at them. But what people haven’t noticed about my Pumpkin Pasties is how easily they transform into something else . . .

She picks up a Pumpkin Pasty. She throws it like a grenade. It explodes.

And you won’t believe what I can do with my Chocolate Frogs. Never — never — have I let anyone off this train before they reached their destination. Some have tried — Sirius Black and his cronies, Fred and George Weasley. ALL HAVE FAILED. BECAUSE THIS TRAIN — IT DOESN’T LIKE PEOPLE GETTING OFF IT . . .