Sunny - Mona Lisa Darkening

Light glimmered through my closed lids as we began to glow. He picked up the rhythm, shoved himself the tiniest bit harder inside me as I rocked and swiveled and gyrated above him. Harder, faster, taking him all, taking him fully, taking him deep, a part of me forever.

"Amber!" I cried as he touched me, the rough gentleness of his fingers sliding over my swollen nub, prominent now, button-hard. A sizzling stroke that sent a sharp bolt of pleasure through me, making me gasp, making me open my eyes. A gentle squeezing pinch over my swollen clit, a gentle forceful drive into me at the same time, sending me flying into climax.

A moment of suspended breath, of suspended pleasure.

Then bursting ecstasy, wracking shudders, spilling cries… and the horrible realization, as I gazed down and felt him follow me into spilling release, that he glowed — and I didn't!

WORDS came later with terrible awkwardness. "Did I… please you?" Amber asked uncertainly. He asked because when Monères had sex, they glowed, but only if they felt pleasure. I hadn't glowed.

"Yes, you pleased me. You saw… felt me come."

"But you didn't —"

"No, I didn't glow." My smile was bittersweet as I realized that things weren't as bad as I thought — they were worse. Much worse.

"Maybe I was too gentle."

I laughed, a far from happy sound. "No, you were perfect." I kissed him lightly, poignantly, trying to say I'm sorry, it's not your fault in that tender gesture. Maybe even a silent good-bye.

"I'm going to take a shower." I slipped out of bed.

The water ran over me, washing away the musky smell of sex, of remembered pleasure, making me feel washed away as well — washed of everything that I was.

I've lost everything. Everything. . even Amber.

Human weakness, human frailty — that might have been workable. No matter my other shortcomings, I could have still been their Queen… as long as I could Bask. As long as I could draw down the renewing rays of the moon and share it with my people. I couldn't now. I couldn't glow. That inner luminous shine of the moon kept as a reservoir within our bodies was no longer in me. I no longer held the moon's light.

A part of me wondered if I was no longer Monère, just human now. Another part of me said it didn't matter. I was useless to my people. Whatever I was, I was useless to them.

Drying off, I went back into the bedroom and found Amber naked, waiting for me. "Tell me what I did wrong?" he said, eyes worried.

"You did nothing wrong, Amber. The problem is with me, not you. Why don't you take a quick shower," I suggested quietly, pulling on my clothes. "And I'll explain everything downstairs. Not only to you, but to the others also. They'll need to know."

It was the hardest thing to leave, to walk away from him. Shutting the door softly, I walked downstairs.

Dontaine and Aquila were the last to arrive. All the rest of my family — Chami, Tomas, Rosemary, Tersa, Jamie, and Thaddeus — were already in the front parlor. Nolan and his wife, Hannah, our healer, were also there. They, too, had a right to know. Exactly what, I was still working out. Lots of secrets I had to keep, but some… most…just didn't matter anymore. If what I suspected was true, I would no longer be with them much longer. So I told them many of the things I hadn't told them before. I told them about Mona Louisa becoming demon dead — not how she had become that way, but that she simply was. Everyone just assumed it was through the usual way — that she died and made the transition to demon life.

When I told them that Mona Louisa's demon essence had somehow become a part of me, and my brother asked, "How?" I told him, told everyone, that it was a demon secret I had sworn not to reveal.

"Sworn to who?" Chami asked.

"To Halcyon and to the High Lord."

That I was acquainted with the reclusive High Lord of Hell didn't seem to faze my men at all, though Nolan and his wife seemed shocked by the knowledge. But then my men knew that I had gone down to Hell twice before. They likely thought that Mona Louisa's demon essence had blended with mine during one of my trips there. I could imagine Monère mothers, generations from now, telling their children my sad story as a lesson for living Monère never to mix with the demon dead — both literally and figuratively. Not only had I gone down to Hell, the first Monère — well, the first Mixed Blood Monère — ever to do so, but I had mated with the Demon Prince and become part demon in truth. Just desserts, many would no doubt say.

"Mona Louisa's demon essence inside me was why I was whisked down into NetherHell. That's apparently where she belonged. And the dheu part of her, the damned demon part of her inside of me, was what wouldn't let me cross the doorway back into Hell."

"So how did you come back?" Thaddeus asked.

"Halcyon. He and Gryphon found me. When I couldn't pass through the doorway separating the realms, he ripped the demon part of her out of me. I was able to cross into Hell, and from there, into the Living Realm again. But it seems I'm damaged now, not whole. All that makes me Monère is gone — my strength, my speed, my power, all my Monère abilities. I can't even glow anymore. I can no longer Bask. Without that, I cannot be your Queen anymore."

Pin-drop silence. Then a rising jumble of voices. Hannah's voice cut through all the others. "Mona Lisa, if I may, I would like to examine you."

A hush fell over the others. At my nod, she took the seat that Amber vacated for her. "Here, in front of everyone?" she asked.

"Yes." Why not?

She lifted her hands and started with my head, giving a gasp when she touched my forehead. I felt the tendrils of her power sink into me like warm, spreading heat. My sense of everyone had been muted, I realized now, but this power, this inner seeking, I felt strongly.

Giving a soft cry, she jerked her hands away from me, not quickly but slowly, as if something sticky tugged her to me and was loathe to give her up.

"What's wrong?" Nolan asked sharply.

Hannah gazed at me mutely.

"Go ahead," I said. "You can tell everyone what you sensed."

"Sensed is a good word," Hannah said, her voice slightly tremulous. "That brief touch only allowed me a glimpse of your inner wounding. Your energy… aura, I suppose would be the best word for it… is severely damaged."

"Is that why you pulled away from me like that?"

"No, I drew back so abruptly because that wound in your aura drew on my energy with unexpected force when I touched you."

"Is that usual?" I asked, frowning.

"Far from it."

"Then, why did it happen?"

"Your body is trying to heal itself. Do you feel any better?"

I searched inwardly. "No, it feels the same. Like this raw, open wound. How about you? Did touching me hurt you?"

Hannah shook her head.

"Then why are you trembling?"

"Because you siphoned off quite a bit of my healing energy. I wasn't expecting that. Didn't even know it could be done."

She reached her hands out to me once more.

"Whoa, just a second," I said, leaning away from her.

"If I just siphoned off enough energy to make you this shaky, why are you trying to touch me again?"

"I wasn't prepared for it the first time," Hannah said. "I should be able to control it better, now that I know what to expect. I'd like to examine you again, more thoroughly this time, and see if my energy helped you in any way."

Because I wanted to know as well, I agreed. "All right, but if you can't control it, you release me right away, understood?"

She nodded and her fingertips rose to hover just over my face. I felt that warm, healing energy floating just out of reach. She ran her fingers down the sides of my neck, touched briefly. A small jolt of energy passed between us — was drawn out of her. She lift her fingers away and continued down my body.