Neal Barrett Jr. - The Prophecy Machine

And, worse still, there were those who were clever enough, and greedy enough as well, to feel they should have such a wonder as Julia themselves. People like Sabatino Nucci and his father. They both had that glimmer of lust in their eyes, that special look you saw in merchants, bankers and thieves.

Not the same look when a man saw Letitia Louise-that was a look quite different from anything else.

And what, Finn wondered, was he to make of the dinner table scene between Calabus and Sabatino? Whatever that was about, the son had nearly come unraveled when the tipsy old man had begun to speak of some invention of his own.

That, and the bizarre business of Hatters and Hooters. Finn would be glad to put it all behind him in the morning, and never look back. If, he reminded himself, that idiot didn't run him through at dawn. Strangely enough, he felt totally detached from that event, as if it were so ridiculous it could never come about.

Finn was certain he'd never sleep, but it wasn't long before he did. And, not long after that, he came fully awake again, and sat up in the bed.

The house creaked and groaned like a shaky old man, but this was a different kind of sound. A hoot was what it was, or a lot of hoots at once, like a flock of noisy owls. Only these weren't owls, he knew, but a pack of maniacs.

Beetles and Bones, what was wrong with these people? Why couldn't they act like the civilized folk back home? Granted, the prince, and the princes before him, had been at war with neighbors for seven hundred years, but nearly every kingdom did that. A war was a totally different thing. It wasn't about a bunch of crazies in yellow hats, or another bunch that howled at the moon. This sort of thing made no sense at all …

“Letitia, are you awake, dear?”

“I am now, Finn.”

“I'm sorry. I heard them. The Hooters. I wondered if you heard them too.”

“No, I didn't. As you guessed, I was asleep. I was dreaming about thistleberry pie. It was bubbling over, and sugary drops were sizzling on the stove. The juice made little hissing sounds as it came up through the crust. Oh, Finn, what do you want? Please tell me and let me get back, before that pie is gone.”

Finn ran his fingers across her cheek. “I feel very bad about this, Letitia, don't make me feel any worse. I'm glad we didn't eat that fish. I am not at all sure it wasn't spoiled. I don't think even if you're dead, you're supposed to look like that.”

Letitia yawned and stretched. “Food that looks bad begins to look good when your tummy starts making funny sounds. Did you ever think of that?”

“I'm hungry too, you know.”

“I'm sure you are, Finn. Good night again.”

Letitia leaned over, gave him a peck on the cheek, plopped down and faced the other way.

“I've been thinking,” Finn said, “about the future and the past. This vacation, though it hasn't been a great deal of fun so far, has brought some ideas to mind, things sort of rattling about in my head.

“You've brought a lot into my life, Letitia. I'm a different man than I was before. I was just drifting in my craft, doing some of this, some of that. I made lizards that blow on the fire, lizards you could put the garbage in. A skinny lizard to poke in your musket and clean the barrel out. Captain what's-his-name, you remember him, the Balloon Grenadiers. He had a thing for you, which doesn't much matter, since he's quite dead now.

“Anyway, he gave me the idea for that. Sold a lot of them, too. I can likely sell more, since the war shows very little sign of slowing down.

“That's off the subject, though, or maybe not. It wasn't very easy selling lizards when I first thought them up. Folks would say, ‘What on earth is that, what's it for?’ I really didn't get off the ground until the bug-snatcher came along. Now that caught on very quickly. That tongue leaping out all the time seemed to frighten little children, but they soon got over that. People didn't like to empty it, of course, and I can't blame them, I suppose.

“By the way, that's where I got the idea for the dirt-sucker, dear. That went quite well. After that, things went downhill awhile with Lizards-for-the-Blind. One can't be right all the time, and no one was badly hurt.

“All this, Letitia, is what got me thinking. You simply can't stand still, you've got to try-even if something goes wrong. And that's what I did, and that's how Julia came to be. After I made her, everything else seemed rather tame. It was something no one had ever done, something so different I can't ever tell anyone except you. I made a creature out of seventeen kinds of metal, elements common and rare. Then I put the ferret's brain in. I don't know why I did that, I just did.

“It scared the hell out of me, too. Shar and Dankermain got hung three hundred years back for doing much the same-making human-like creatures out of animals, and giving them the power to think.

“I'm awfully glad they did Newlies, dear, because now I have you. Of course, they did it with magic, and I just fiddled around with scraps and tiny gears. It's not the same thing, but who'd believe that? Why, they'd put a noose around my neck and cut me up in pieces, just like those crazy seers.

“What was I saying, now? Yes, about the future, what I want to do next. Did I say it scared me when I finished Julia Jessica Slagg? It did, but it had another effect as well. It made me see what could be done, what unbelievable worlds could be explored. It was our misadventure with Count Onjine and his Yowlies-I know you won't forget that. At any rate, it was there I learned that Julia could actually see the tiny bit of poison in the jeweled lizard that would have killed the prince if we hadn't stopped the Count in time. It was a thing no human could ever see, and it struck me that if Julia could learn to craft devices so small, what's to keep those near invisible machines from making smaller devices still?

“What a marvel that would be! I was dizzy at the thought, and I'm often dizzy still.

“This is what I wished to tell you, dear. I should have mentioned it before, but with the trouble at sea, and our odd predicament here … Anyway, do you think me fevered, love? Some sort of vain, crack-brained fellow whose dreams have taken him over the brink, like the poor hapless loonies in a dark asylum somewhere? If you believe that's so, I wish you'd tell me, please. Don't hold back for fear I'll be crushed, for I'm not as proud as that.

“Please, Letitia. I need your honest thoughts on this. We have not been together long, but I feel we've seen the birth of a deep and meaningful relationship. So, do you think you've given your love to a man with some wits about him, or a hopeless buffoon?

“Letitia?

“Letitia Louise …?”

Finn sat up. Letitia snored lightly, a lock of hair rising on her cheek with every peaceful breath.

“Beads and Weeds, dear, I can't believe you'd do this to me. It's inconsiderate, is what it is. I really feel you should apologize.”

“You lull her to sleep with your babble, and you want an apology to boot?”

Julia gave a tinny chuckle from her perch across the room. “You nearly put me under, and I've never been asleep in my life.”

“You didn't have to listen. Everything I say isn't directed at you.”

“Everything you talked about is me. It's nothing we haven't discussed before. I am always loathe to agree with you, Finn. You have a sizeable head as it is. In this case, though, I quite approve. Delving into the microscopic world is a bold, exciting idea. If, as I have learned, the world is made of Earth, Air, Sky and Water, what indeed are those things made of?

“Of all the tomes on your shelves, I find the ones on the philosophy of the cosmos the most intriguing of all.