Alastair Reynolds - Revelation Space

“What do you think it is?” Calvin asked, his voice so low that it almost merged with Sylveste’s own thoughts, almost was one of Sylveste’s own thoughts.

“I was hoping you’d have some suggestions.”

“Sorry; all out of shattering insights. Too many for one lifetime.”

Volyova drifted in space.

She had not died when the Melancholia went up, though she had not managed to make it to the spider-room in time. What she had done was don her helmet just before the hull whispered away, like a moth’s wing against a candle. Falling away from the wreckage, she had not been targeted by the lighthugger. It had ignored her; just as it ignored the spider-room.

She could not simply die. That was emphatically not her style. And though she knew that her chances of survival were statistically negligible, and that what she was doing was entirely bereft of logic, she had to prolong the hours she had left. She scanned her air and power reserves and saw that they were not good; not good at all. She had taken the suit hastily, thinking that the only use she would have for it was to reach the shuttle across the hangar. She had not even had the presence of mind to hook it up to one of the recharging modules aboard the shuttle during their flight. That at least would have bought her a few days, rather than the fraction of a day she now faced. Yet, perversely, she did not simply arrange to end things immediately. She knew she could make the reserves last longer if she slept when consciousness was not required (assuming, of course, that she ever had any further use for it).

So she programmed the suit to drift, telling it to alert her only if something interesting—or, more probably, threatening—happened. And now, because she had woken, something evidently had.

She asked the suit what it was.

The suit told her.

“Shit,” Ilia Volyova said.

The Infinity ’s radar had just swept across her; the same radar which it had used against the shuttle, just before deploying its gamma-ray weapon. And it had done so with an intensity which suggested that the ship was in her immediate neighbourhood; no more than a few tens of thousands of kilometres away; not even spitting distance when it came to picking off a target as large, defenceless, static and conspicuous as she now was.

She hoped the ship would have the good grace to finish her off with something swift. After all, there was a very high likelihood that whatever it chose to use against her would be a system she had designed herself.

Not for the first time, she cursed her ingenuity.

Volyova enabled the suit’s binocular overlay and began sweeping the starfield from which the targeting radar had projected. At first she saw only blackness and stars—and then the ship, tiny as a chip of coal, but edging closer with every second.

“It’s not Amarantin, is it? We agree on that.”

“The jewel, you mean?”

“Whatever it is. And I don’t think they were responsible for the light, whatever that is.”

“No. That’s not their handiwork either.” Sylveste realised now that he was deeply grateful for Calvin’s presence, no matter how illusory it was; no matter how much it was a deception. “Whatever these things are—whatever their relationship to each other—the Amarantin just found them.”

“I think you’re right.”

“Maybe they didn’t even understand what they had found—not properly, anyway. But for one reason or another they had to enclose it; had to hide it from the rest of the universe.”

“Jealousy?”

“Perhaps. But that wouldn’t explain the warnings we got coming here. Perhaps they enclosed them as a favour to the rest of Creation, because they couldn’t destroy them, or move them elsewhere.”

Sylveste thought. “Whoever put them here originally—around a neutron star—must have meant for them to attract someone’s attention. Don’t you think?”

“Like a lure?”

“Neutron stars are common enough, but they’re still exotic; especially from the point of view of a culture just achieving the capability for starflight. It was guaranteed that the Amarantin would be drawn here through sheer curiosity.”

“They weren’t the last, were they?”

“No, I don’t suppose they were.” Sylveste drew a breath. “Do you think we should go back, while we still can?”

“Rationally, yes. Is that enough of an answer for you?”

They pushed forward.

“Take us towards the light first,” Calvin said, minutes later. “I want to see it closer. It seems—this is going to sound stupid—but it seems somehow stranger than the other thing. If there’s one thing I’d choose to die having seen up close, I think it’s that light.”

“That’s how I feel,” Sylveste said. He was already doing what Calvin had suggested, as if the intention had sprung from his own will. What Calvin said was right; there was indeed something deeper about the strangeness of the light; something more profound, older. He had not been able to put that feeling into words, or even properly acknowledge it, but now it was out in the open, and it felt right. The light was where they had to go.

It was silvery in texture; a diamond gash in the fabric of reality, simultaneously intense and calm. Approaching it, the orbiting jewel (stationary now, in this frame) seemed to dwindle. Smooth pearly radiance surrounded the suit. He felt that the light should hurt his eyes, but there was nothing except a feeling of warmth, and a kind of slowly magnifying knowing. Gradually he lost sight of the rest of the chamber and the jewel, until he seemed to be enveloped in a blizzard of silver and whiteness. He felt no danger; no threat; only resignation—and it was a joyous resignation, bursting with immanence. Slowly, magically, the suit itself seemed to turn transparent, the silver luminance bursting through until it reached his skin, and then pushed deeper, into his flesh and bones.

It was not quite what he had been expecting.

Afterwards, when he came to consciousness (or descended to it, since it seemed that in the hiatus he had been somewhere above it), there was only understanding.

He was back in the chamber again, some distance from the white light, still within the rotating frame of the jewel.

And he knew.

“Well,” Calvin said, his voice as unexpected and out-of-place in the tranquillity that followed as a trumpet blast. “That was some trip, wasn’t it?”

“Did you… experience all that?”

“Put it this way. That was weirdest damned thing I’ve ever felt. Does that answer you?”

It was. There was no need to push beyond that; no need to convince himself further that Calvin had shared all that he had felt, or that for a moment their thoughts—and more—had liquefied and flowed indivisibly, along with a trillion others. And that he understood perfectly what had happened, because in the moment of shared wisdom, all his questions had been answered.

“We were read , weren’t we? That light is a scanning device; a machine for retrieving information.” The words sounded perfectly reasonable before he said them, but in the saying of them he felt he was expressing himself poorly, debasing the thing of which he spoke by the crudity of language. But for all the insights he had felt in that place, his vocabulary had not been enlarged enough to encompass them. And even now they seemed to be fading; the way a dream’s magical qualities seemed to wither in the first few seconds of waking. But he had to say it, to at least crystallise what he felt; get it recorded by the suit’s memory for posterity, if nothing else. “For a moment I think we were turned into information, and that in that instant we were linked to every other piece of information ever known; every thought ever thought, or at least ever captured by the light.”