Gord Zajac - Major Karnage

Galt waved it away. “I saw the report.”

“So you know there’s nothing we can do. They have superior firepower. Superior technology. We simply don’t stand a chance.”

“There has to be something we can do. There has to be.”

“There is,” Steve said. “We can cooperate.”

“Cooperate? We can’t just let them waltz in and take over!”

“Nobody will be taking over anyone. It’s just a friendly merger. We’ll get full value on our shares, access to all of their latest medical and technological advances, and other special perks.”

“My god.” Galt dropped his head into his hands.

“I know it’s a lot to take in, Uncle, but it’s going to happen sooner or later. They’re going to take over whether we like it or not. It’s better for everyone this way. No violence. No war. No unnecessary bloodshed. In effect, we get to rule over the entire world.”

Galt looked up in surprise. “I’m a businessman, Steven. Not a dictator.”

“Is there really that much difference?”

“Yes. Yes, goddammit, there is. And until you realize that for yourself, you will never be fit to run this company.”

“I never said I wanted to—”

“You don’t have to say it, you little shit. I can see it in your eyes!”

“Uncle, calm down.”

“Well, I won’t have any part of it. Do you hear me? I won’t let you do it! I’m a businessman, and that is that.”

“I’m afraid it’s not your decision to make,” Steve said quietly. “The board has already voted. They’ve fully endorsed the plan.”

“How dare you. How dare you go behind my back over this. We’re not the government. We’re a private corporation!”

“We do everything, Uncle. We already are the government.”

Galt banged his fist. “Don’t say such things! This is a business, not a goddamn bureaucracy!”

Steve shook his head, as Galt stabbed a finger at him angrily. “I will bury you over this, do you hear me?”

“You really have no idea how much is stacked up against you, Uncle.”

“Don’t you dare threaten me. I won’t let you. I won’t let you do any of this. It’s not our place. It’s just not our place.”

“It doesn’t matter, Uncle. The decision’s been made.”

Galt shook with rage. “But I don’t want to rule the world!”

“Now, Uncle—”

Galt’s face went red. “I don’t want to rule the world!”

“Uncle, your heart—”

Galt slammed his fist into the table and shouted. “I don’t want to rule the world! I—”

Galt’s face went white and he clutched his shoulder.

Steve watched silently as his uncle slid out of his seat and disappeared behind his desk.

The screen went black. Sydney was staring at the floor, her limbs quivering with nervous energy. “People need to see this. They need to know what’s going on.” She looked up at the screen. “Can you give me a copy of that footage you just showed us?”

A slim silver disc slid out the front of the cabinet. Sydney picked it up and looked at it curiously. “I hope I can find something that still plays this.” She tucked the disc into her jacket. “Come on, Major. Let’s go.” She headed for the door.

Karnage didn’t follow. He looked up into Galt’s cataract-laden eyes. “Where can I find Steve Dabney?”

The screen flashed, showing a helicopter view of Dabneyville. It zoomed in on the needle-like tower and the forest beyond. “Come visit the pristine forests of the Dabney Preserve, accessible exclusively from the canopy bridge, located on the observation decks of the Dabney National Tower, the world’s tallest freestanding—”

“Where’s the Dabney National Tower?” Karnage said.

The screen cut to old footage of Galt Dabney wearing a construction hat. His hair and moustache were black. “The DN Tower will be located atop the corporate headquarters of the Dabney Corporation, home to the expansive Dabney Family Archives, and—”

“What’s the quickest way to get to the Dabney National Tower from here?”

The screen cut to grainy security footage of an engineer talking to Galt Dabney. “The executive elevator will run clear up the length of the DN Tower right down to the main lobby.”

“Make it run all the way down into the vaults.” Galt poked the engineer in the ribs. “You never know when I’ll have to make a quick getaway.” The engineer nodded and smiled.

The screen went black, and a set of bookcases whirred open behind Karnage, revealing a brass elevator car. Karnage looked up at Galt’s head. “Thanks. I’ll try and hit Steve once for you.”

The screen showed security footage from Galt’s corner office. He was talking to another executive. “That Steven is a smart fellow, but he is also one dangerous sonofabitch.”

“I’ll keep that in mind.” Karnage headed for the elevator.

Sydney was standing halfway through the door. “Major, what are you doing?!”

“You do what you gotta do, Captain,” Karnage said. “I’ve still got some questions for ol’ Steve Dabney.”

“You can’t face him alone. What about your Sanity Patch? You don’t even have a weapon!”

The elevator doors shut with a soft bing.

Karnage calmly rode the elevator. He watched the numbers above the door change, slowly making their way upward. He shut his eyes, focused his mind, and concentrated on his long-term goal: Cookie. Velasquez. Heckler. Stumpy. Koch. Cookie. Velasquez. Heckler. Stumpy. Koch. Then he felt his body relaxing, and the Sanity Patch downgraded to Daffodil, as if voicing its approval. Karnage took a deep breath. He was as ready for this as he’d ever be.

The elevator binged, and the doors slid open, as a cool breeze wafted into the elevator. Karnage stepped out, and found himself on a wide circular deck overlooking the desert, the elevator housed in a cylindrical beam in the centre. An absolutely breathtaking view stretched out on all sides. The glass floor gave him a clear view of the microscopically small buildings below while a guard rail ran around the perimeter of the deck at waist height, punctuated only by thick steel beams with a thin netting draped between them. The netting wafted in the wind as the chilled air blew through it and over Karnage’s skin. Karnage walked slowly along the deck, and the mountain came into view on the other side of the elevator shaft. Soon the mountain loomed high beside him, the lush green of the pine trees intermittently broken by steep shanks of grey rock: lifeless desert on one side, forested mountain on the other.

“Hello, you.”

Karnage turned around. Standing on the deck behind him, in front of a metal door marked EMERGENCY EXIT, was Patrick, aiming a pistol at Karnage’s chest. A manila enveloped was tucked under his arm.

“Don’t move,” he said. Patrick flipped open the envelope with his free hand, and pulled out a slim tablet. He let the envelope fall free. The wind picked it up, and it flew into the netting where it flapped uselessly, like a fly stuck in a spider’s web. Patrick angled the tablet so it was propped against his chest; he held it along the bottom with one hand, while the other kept the gun barrel firmly pointed at Karnage’s chest. He flicked the tablet on.

Steve Dabney appeared on the screen. He smiled.

“Hello, Major,” he said. “I’m sorry to deprive you of your big moment, but I’m afraid my priorities lie elsewhere. I think it’s sweet the way you keep trying to save the world. I know you don’t like to think of yourself as a romantic, but the zeal you’ve put into this endeavour belies the truth. You’re like a samurai who has lost his master: rōnin, if you like. Rudderless. Directionless. Looking for answers. Life must be very difficult for you in this new world. I pity you.