N. Kosenkov - Easy Way to Get And Stay Slim. Mindset For Weight Loss

– Organization rules.

We’ll begin classes on time. It is very important. If you’re late, you’ll miss something, and that’s not good.

Your cell phones should be turned off.Even vibration signals are unacceptable. Purses, crawling on the table under vibration, can interrupt important psychological practice at the crucial moment.

Imagine, we are sitting here, concentrated, focused on some moment. Meditative music is playing. Suddenly.

Buzz-z-z-z-z! Someone’s purse is running to us, vibrating like a mad hare! You know, no matter how many times I remind to turn off the phones. Everybody says: “Certainly, we’ll turn them off.” But then we hear phone ringing!

– ☺

– Now let’s talk about safety.

First, there is the “Stop!” rule. If we hit where it hurts you, if you do not want to work at this problem right now, you have a right to say:

“Stop! I don’t want to discuss it!” And we stop talking about it.

There is one more thing: privacy.You can say anything you want about me, about the program, but everything you hear within these walls about each other (and we’ll talk about personal life, work, discuss various issues that you are eager to share with us) must stay here. Can we rely on one another? Everything said by participants about themselves or each other cannot leave this room. It shouldn’t be revealed to anyone else. Promise?

– It goes in one ear and out the other.

– Active involvement.So the first rule is so-called I-statement.Many people use to say all the time “we”, “we believe”, “we think”. “We” is a great cover for hiding thing that allows evading any responsibility. Let’s talk in the first person!

The next point. You can ask any question you want.Every unresolved issue leads to a lack of information, wrong actions, and wrong results.

The next rule is “swapping”. We will change seats after every class.

First, your main task is to sit by Victor for at least once.

– What about me? Will I stay in the same seat?

– ☺

– No, you will change your seat too. They say that those who are sitting closer to the leader of the group lose weight faster. That’s why we need constant swapping. ☺ What for?

We all want to gain results – and to change our life! Big changes start from the little ones.

It is desirable to make some changes in the kitchen too. You can buy new beautiful dishware, tablecloth, table napkins or plastic overlays; put some flowers on the table, hang new curtains. It’s important, as earlier you lead a different life in this kitchen. You had an eating behavior that led you to excess body weight. Now a new life begins!

Andrey Vasilyevich Trenogov, psychologist, psychiatrist:

In one research, scientists studied people who lost excess weight (the focus group included people weighing more than two hundred and sixty pounds who had several weight loss experiences) and maintained achieved weight for at least two years. The researchers tried to understand what all these people had in common. What helped them to lose weight successfully? As it turned out, all the people believed that they would finally achieve their goal this time. Secondly, everyone faced changes in life. Some of them married, divorced or changed career. The others moved or renovated their house. Everybody who lost weight successfully faced not only internal changes but external changes as well.

Group session of psychologist

Artyom Andreyevich Ovechkin:

– Another rule. Let’s speak in turn. When I take the floor, I speak. When you take the floor, you speak. When five people are talking at the same time, no one is listening. We are here not to make noise to wake the dead. Do you accept the rules?

Yes!

Nikolay Ivanovich Kosenkov, member of Petrovskaya Academy of Sciences and Arts, Ph. D. of medical science

Nonconstructive methods can be used in communication if a person hasn’t got any problems. But this doesn’t occur often. A person often does not realize that he has some kind of problem! He believes that he is always late because of some embarrassing chain of events. If he is overweight, this it’s caused by bad genes. The person has no willpower to reduce food consumption and give up unhealthy habits. He blames the disruption of the endocrine system and anything else – except himself. As usual, this problem does not bother him. But when it affects others, they are trying to the point that to him in every possible way. People begin to use the following communication patterns, which ultimately do not lead to an awareness of the problem. If there is no awareness, then there is no solution, either.

The following are the methods of communication that we use in everyday life.

Nonconstructive methods of communication with a problematic person

1. Pushing a person to the independent solution of the problem:

– order;

– warning, threat;

– preaching;

– advice, proposals, interpretation;

– using logical arguments, lecturing.

2. Underlining of weaknesses and fails:

– criticism, accusation;

– the practice of naming and shaming;

– diagnosis, interpretation.

3. Attempt to improve well-being:

– praise, positive evaluation;

– consolation, encouragement.

4. Wrong questions:

– questions to gather additional information;

– questions to get away from the problem.

There are constructive means of conducting a conversation. They allow us to hear the person and understand his problem. The one who can listen is the best talker. These methods are presented below. We will learn to listen to each other and ourselves during our session.

Constructive methods of communication with a problematic person

1. Passive listening:

– keeping silence;

– empathic approval (“Uh-huh,” “Yeah, I understand,” nodding);

– “Gate-opening” (“Your story was so interesting. Would you mind to tell me something else?”).

2. Active listening:

pronouncing (the interlocutor repeats word for word statement of the partner. However, he can start with introductory phrases:

“From what I understand…”, “In other words…”, “In your opinion…”);

– paraphrasing (the interlocutor reproduces the statement of the partner in short, generalized form, summarizing the most significant things in his words. He can start with introductory phrases: “As I understood, your main ideas are…”, “So…”);

– the interlocutor tries to derive a logical consequence from the statements of the partner or to put forward an assumption regarding the reasons for the statement of the partner. At the same time, he can begin with an introductory phrase (“If we proceed from what you said, then it turns out that…”, “Apparently, you think so because…”).

Olga Vladimirovna Tsyganova, 28, economist, lost 110 lbs I was very lucky with the group. There were only nine of us, as it was a morning group. I felt like a part of the team. There was a pleasant and comfortable atmosphere. The others were very understanding. I was finally able to talk about things that bothered me. I listened to others and realized that I was not the only one in the world facing this problem. We’ve got everything in the class: laughter, tears, and interesting discussions. I went out inspired, charged with a lot of positive energy. That’s when I understood: “I can do it!”