Dorsai - Jan

"So love is a kind of trading?"

"At its most basic and fundamental level, it IS trading. The trading of one's best values for the best values of another, freely, as equals, value for value. That's why Susan wasn't willing to stay Phil's girlfriend: there wasn't love involved. She offered her best, and Phil offered his best, and because the values involved weren't equal, she felt cheated after a fashion, and withdrew her love. The value he offered her – the content of his mind and character – his love – was worth far less than the love – her character and values – she was offering. To continue such an unequal trade is to commit suicide, either emotionally or spiritually or mentally; Susan simply has too much self-respect – self-value – to do that."

After a bit, she asked me "Then how does sex fit into it? Jan told me that you said having sex and making love were different."

"As far as I'm concerned, they are. 'Making love' is the physical equivalent of the spiritual love I just described. Having sex is the physical act, but without emotional attachment involved in making love.

Last night, when we were kissing, that was 'making love' on a small scale, because we truly cared for each other. Kissing, without that bond, is only having sex, on an equally small scale. Get it?"

With that, I saw a light come on in her eyes – that sensation almost everyone has when something that's been bothering them suddenly becomes clear, and they really, truly understand it, fully and completely.

"Then I want you to teach me how to make love. Completely. To all of me." she told me, confidently, with an absolute radiance.

Yeah, she got it.

I began by leaning down to kiss her, softly, on her forehead, then the bridge of her nose. Both eyes were next, then her cheeks, and finally – gently – her lips. Her return kiss was equally gentle, and she patiently accepted it when I moved on to kiss more of her face before returning to her lips. This time, my kisses were firmer, as were hers. Gradually, in an ever-increasing cycle, we became more and more insistent, and more and more involved with each other – at times, I didn't know where I ended and she began.

As our bonding started, so did our explorations: reaching out, my hand landed on her breast, gently as a butterfly, then began stroking it from base to tip the same way. Firm as her breasts were, I could feel them tighten even more at my touch, her nipple first hardening, then erecting to press into the palm of my hand.

Her hand took a less direct route – first touching my face, she softly and slowly trailed it down my chest, then my belly, until she reached my manhood, full of blood but not yet erect. Her gentle stroking soon corrected that deficiency, and she continued on by cupping my testicles in her hand, and stroking the sack, and even rolling them in her hand before trailing her fingers back up, and along the length of me.

Following her example, I traced my way down her body, fingertips barely touching her, pausing here and there to create little designs on her skin, before reaching her pubis, and finally, her womanly treasure. I was not surprised to find that her clitoris had raised its head in greeting, nor that her inner recess had opened for my explorations. I softly traced the outline of her pubic hair, and make several trips across and through its lushness, marveling at its softness. However, I was continuously drawn back to the damp, hot opening between her legs, and began exploring it with my finger – tracing the outline of the lips guarding it; drawing my fingertip between her inner lips, feeling them almost clutching at me, as though inviting me in. Ultimately, I did as they bid, and carefully pressed a fingertip in toward her very core -and was made welcome by the hunching of her hips, inviting me in even farther.

I went carefully, though – pressing in slightly, and then withdrawing, to make sure that her slippery juices were well distributed before pressing further inward. I met the resistance of her maidenhead, but found my way past it without hurting her, until, finally, I had an entire digit in her. Her moans into my mouth encouraged me to further action, and after a short pause, I began stroking it in and out of her, feeling her inner lips clasping at my finger as it withdrew, and guiding me on the way back in. In a surprisingly short time, her pelvis was rising and falling in time with my actions, and she'd broken off our kiss to gasp and moan as her passion increased. After only a couple of minutes, she was near the peak, but somehow unable to cross it. It was then that I moved my thumb down to apply pressure to her clitoris, so that her pelvic movement caused the pressure against my thumb to vary each time she raised her hips. That, apparently, was enough, and it took perhaps a half dozen such thrusts to finally grant her the release she'd sought for so long: when it finally hit, her first spasm froze her in mid-air: hips raised, pressing her clitoris against my thumb, with my finger inside her as far as it would reach. I could feel the milking action of her vaginal walls as she tried to draw my digit even farther inside; to increase her pleasure, I made circling motions with it, causing her to gasp out the last bit of air she had in her lungs before her vaginal mouth clamped down as her contractions continued, one after the other. It was only when her oxygen-starved brain demanded refreshment that she finally stopped her climax, and drew breath again.

After that first draw of breath, she started panting, and lowered her hips again. I slowly withdrew my finger, causing her to moan, and evincing a flutter from her vaginal mouth. Selfishly, I cleaned it off with my own tongue, savoring the sweet/spicy flavor she'd blessed it with. Satisfied, I lay next to her, holding her as she continued trying to catch her breath, and regain her senses. Her good health and youthful vigor helped her recovery, and it was only a few minutes before she opened her eyes, looking up at me with a gratitude I'd never seen before. To give her a little more time to recover, I gestured something to drink, and she nodded. Returning from the kitchen with some cool water and a couple of glasses, I filled one, and held her up so that she could drink. A few swallows seemed to satisfy her, and she indicated that I should put the glass down. When I did, she turned and hugged me fiercely, crying into my chest.

When she finally released me, and lay back down, she said "Thank you!

Now I know that what I felt before wasn't orgasms – that was. That's the first time in my life that I've ever felt like that, and it's because of you. I had no idea that anything could feel that good!"

"Like I said, it was just a matter of having the right attention and some encouragement. I was just lucky enough to be able to offer them at the right time, and in the right way. you did the rest by being open to the experience, and willing to take advantage of it."

"On the subject of taking advantage, are you going to, of me?"

I laughed, and said "Only if you want me to, Kelly – though if you *want* me to, I don't think it could really be considered 'taking advantage'."

"I do want – but before that, I want to find out about all the other things we can do together. Um, Jan told me that you, uh, use your mouth to, you know, make her climax. Could you do that to me, too?"

I smiled, and said, "It would be my pleasure, I assure you!" making her laugh before replying,"Yeah, I heard that."

With her fully recovered, I was ready to resume the 'lessons' – and lowered myself to kiss her, softly, on the lips. She responded eagerly, but not demanding; knowing that she was about to experience something new.

I kissed her lips again, briefly, several more times, before moving down to plant one on her throat, just next to her collarbone. The next was was halfway between collar and the hollow of her throat. I continued kissing her as I worked my way to the other side, and beyond, to her shoulder, where I kissed, then softly bit, her. Placing my kisses more closely to each other, I moved back toward her neck, until I was past their juncture, and halfway up her neck to her ear. Taking the muscle in my teeth, I made growling noises, and gently – so as to leave no bruises – waggled my head back and forth, as though chewing on her. She laughed, and giggled, and even scrunched her shoulder up before I released her and moved on to take her earlobe between my lips, and softly 'chew' on it. When she gasped, I released it, and using just the very tip of my tongue, traced the outline and edges of her shell-like ear – and eliciting soft moans of appreciation.