Todd Strasser - Wish You Were Dead

Courtney recovered completely. Her mother came back from India. They fight a lot about her curfew.

Maura hasn’t come back to school, and I’ve heard she’s moving away. I sent her a message saying that it wasn’t her fault and nobody blames her. But she didn’t write back.

At low tide, the seagulls picked up clams and dropped them on the seawall behind my house. It was a cold, clear December afternoon, and I sat on a bench in our backyard, watching the gulls and enjoying the warmth of the sun on my face.

Suddenly I felt the presence of someone behind me.

Tensing, I swiveled around.

It was Tyler. The momentary fright drained out of me, and I smiled.

“Your mom said I’d find you back here,” he said.

I patted the bench beside me and he sat down, leaning forward and resting his elbows on his knees. For a few moments we watched a gull peck at a clam in a broken shell.

“I always think seagulls have to be pretty smart to break open clams by dropping them,” I finally said.

“Not as smart as the ones in Kansas City,” said Tyler.

“Why’s that?”

“In KC they just hang around in the parking lot at McDonald’s.”

I glanced out of the corner of my eye at him. “Are there really seagulls in Kansas City?” “I can let you know, if you’d like.”

I felt my heart sink. He’d come to say good-bye. He was going home. “What about finishing high school?” “I graduated two years ago, Madison.”

Yes , I thought sadly. I should have guessed . “I always thought you seemed more mature than other guys. Didn’t your parents wonder where you were?” “I told them I was living in the city, staying with friends and working as a bartender. That’s the funny thing about cell phones. People never really know where you are.” A gull dropped another clam. We watched the small white dot drop against the blue sky background and shatter on the wall. “Bull’s-eye,” Tyler said.

“I have another question,” I said. “If Ms. Skelling taught at your school, didn’t you know her?” He shook his head. “She must have started there the year after I graduated. I guess you’ve probably figured out by now that I’m not the kind of guy who’d go back to visit.” I nodded.

“I’ve got a question for you,” he said. “You ever figure out who PBleeker was?” I nodded again. “I’ve promised not to tell.”

It was Dave. He’d told me at Adam’s funeral and apologized. I’d recalled that day in the library when I’d asked him if he was PBleeker, and how convincing his denial had been. Maybe I just wasn’t that good at reading people.

“Did I hear you’ve applied to Tufts early decision?” Tyler asked.

“Yes.”

“Your parents okay with that? I mean, after everything that’s happened?” “They wanted me to stay closer, but I have to get away … from the memories.” A gull rose in the air and dropped another clam.

“Don’t they ever miss?” Tyler asked.

“Sometimes. When it’s windy … What do you think you’ll do back in Kansas City?” “Spend some time with my parents. I heard that the police searched Skelling’s house and found some information about what she did with Megan. I don’t think my parents ever gave up hope that she was still alive, so I have to go back and be with them now.” The air was still and the water glassy. The Sound was like a giant pond. I gazed out across it. A tugboat was pulling a barge, leaving an ever-widening wake. I wanted to tell Tyler that I wished he wouldn’t go, but I couldn’t. He had to go back and comfort his parents.

“Madison?”

“Yes?”

“I’ll probably have to stay out in KC for a few months, but it won’t be forever. Frank says that any time I want to come back to the garage in the spring, there’ll be a job for me. So I was just wondering … if that was something you thought you might approve of?” I felt a smile on my lips and slid my hand into his. “Yes, Tyler, I think I would.”