Iris Johansen - The Treasure

“It won’t happen again,” Tarik said. “I went to a great deal of trouble to keep him alive, and I don’t like to see any effort wasted. Now I consider it my duty to watch over Kadar.”

“You can’t know it won’t happen again.”

“I know that he has a better chance under my guardianship than under yours.” He added bluntly, “We both know that his wound would never have occurred if you’d not left the castle.”

She felt as if he had struck her.

“Tarik,” Kadar said warningly.

“I’ve no wish to hurt her, but I’ll not lie.”

“It was my choice to go back for her.”

“Stop defending me.” Selene swallowed to ease her tight throat. “He’s right. It was my fault. But that doesn’t mean-” Their faces were blurring before her. She couldn’t stay in this chamber without breaking down and weeping like a desolate child. “I have to go. I need-I forgot-”

She was running from the chamber and down the hall.

She had reached the staircase when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

“Stop,” Tarik said. “I can’t run down those stairs after you without taking a tumble. Won’t you take pity on a crippled old man?”

She didn’t look at him. “No, you don’t need my pity. Even crippled, you can keep Kadar safer than I did. You were right. It was my fault that-”

“Enough. I feel quite guilty. We both know I used those harsh words only to win my own way.”

“True words.”

“True but cruel. Now turn around and let me see if my words are easing you.”

She slowly turned to face him. “Is that why you came after me?”

“Partly. I’ve grown very fond of you. I don’t like to see you in pain.”

His words had the ring of truth, and his expression was more gentle than she’d ever seen it. “But you did it deliberately anyway.”

“Not willingly. I would never hurt you willingly, Selene.”

His tone held a note of sadness and finality that made her suddenly wary. “You said easing me was only part of the reason you came after me.”

He nodded.

“Tell me.”

“I want you to leave the castle. I’ll provide you with a guard, gold, and a way of departing here that’s much safer than the means you chose before. There’s a tunnel beneath the dungeon that ends in the woods a few miles from here. You and Haroun should reach Scotland before the winter storms.”

“I and Haroun,” she repeated slowly. “Not Kadar.”

“Kadar stays here.”

“I won’t go without him.”

“He’ll be quite safe. After you’re safely away, I’ll take him out the same way.”

“Then why not let him come with me?”

He shook his head.

“Why?”

“You made me a promise. You vowed you’d do anything I said, if I saved Kadar’s life. I saved him. Now I’m asking you to keep your word.”

“I’m not Kadar, who obeys promises blindly. Do you think I’ll let you get Kadar killed by using him to do some foolish task for you?”

“You’d prefer to get him killed protecting you?”

Pain sliced through her. “That’s not fair. It wouldn’t happen again.”

“I wish I could believe you. I cannot. He won’t be safe until you’re safely back at Montdhu.”

“I told you, nothing would have happened to him if everything had gone as I planned. I didn’t know Nasim would come to-”

“True, but circumstances seldom can be manipulated. Things go wrong, and every man has a weakness. You’re Kadar’s.”

“I’m not anyone’s ‘weakness,’ ” she said, bristling. “Certainly not Kadar’s.”

“He almost died for you. And he would do it again. Nasim knows that as well as I do. I have to take you out of the mix. I can’t afford to have him either threatened or distracted right now.” He paused. “I’m speaking the truth. And you know it. You’re a danger to him. Admit it, Selene.”

She didn’t want to admit it. She wanted to argue with him, to tell him-what? He was right. She had almost caused Kadar’s death. Nasim had used her before and would try to use her again.

She could feel the tears sting her eyes and hurriedly looked away. “When do you want me to go?”

“Tonight. The sooner, the better.”

“No. Kadar isn’t well. He still needs me.”

Tarik shook his head.

She lifted her head and forced a smile. “Very well, I’ll go. It’s not as if I wasn’t planning on leaving him anyway. It was only a matter of time.” Her voice was uneven and she steadied it. “And you needn’t stare at me as if I was the one who was wounded. I’m fine. This is exactly what I wanted to do.”

“Is it?”

“Of course it is.” She turned away. “I’ll be ready to go after I give Kadar his supper tonight.” She looked back at him and added fiercely, “But if you’re lying, if you cause anything to happen to him, I’ll come back and cut your heart out.”

“Nothing will happen to him,” he said gently. “I promise, Selene. I want to keep him well and alive as much as you do.”

She believed him. He meant what he said. But that didn’t mean he would succeed in protecting Kadar. “When will you take him away from here?”

“Tomorrow night. Once you’re safely away.”

“And you have a place to hide him from Nasim until he’s well?”

“I know such a place,” he said. “I know it’s hard for you to let him go, but it’s for the-”

“It’s not hard. It’s just not sensible for me to work so hard to keep him alive and then have you place him in danger again.” She moved down the hall. “I’m going back to him now. Make your preparations.”

“I will.” His words followed her: “One more thing. No words of love. It must not be a sweet good-bye. He must not follow you.”

“I do not love-” She couldn’t finish. She did love Kadar. She had always loved him and, God help her, she probably always would. Too much had happened for her to deny it any longer. She had protected herself against the fear that he would someday leave her, and look where it had led her. “It makes no difference if I love him or not. I’m doing this because it’s best for him. It changes nothing.”

“It can change everything. But it must not, in this case. You’re better apart.”

Apart. Separate. She felt a surge of loneliness. “I agree, but not because you say it.” She could feel his gaze on her back as she walked quickly down the corridor.

Kadar turned away from the window when she came into the chamber. He gazed at her searchingly. “Are you well?”

“Why shouldn’t I be well? Do you think a few sharp words can hurt me?” She turned back the coverlet on the bed. “It’s time for your nap. You’ve been up too long already today.”

“Tarik shouldn’t have said that. It was my decision. The fault was mine.”

“Of course it was. I wasn’t thinking clearly. I realized it immediately once I thought about it.” She gestured to the bed. “Now come over here and lie down. Tarik may think you well, but I don’t believe it.”

He hesitated, then crossed the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. “I truly don’t need rest. It seems I’ve done nothing else of late.”

She pushed him down and pulled up the cover. “Be silent and close your eyes.”

“I won’t go to sleep.”

“Close your eyes.”

“Then I won’t be able to see you. You wouldn’t deprive me of my only pleasure?”

He was smiling coaxingly and she could not resist him. She didn’t know when she’d see that smile again. Perhaps never. She sat down on the stool beside the bed. “Do what you like. I’ve told you what’s good for you.”

“ You are good for me.” He winked. “And, if you’d slip into this bed beside me, I’d show you how you could cure all my ills.”