Felix Francis - Dick Francis's Gamble

“Great,” I said. “She will. I’ll see to that.”

“And,” he went on, “we’ve had the first results from the tests.”

“Yes?” Claudia said. “You can tell me.”

“The right ovary seems clear, but, as I feared, there were some cancer cells in the peritoneal fluid. Not many, but enough.”

We were all silent for a moment.

“Chemotherapy?” Claudia said.

“I’m afraid so,” said Dr. Tomic. “But maybe just one course. Two at most. I’m sorry, but it’s the best way forward.”

He left us digesting that not-so-tasty morsel, rushing off no doubt to cut out bits from another desperate cancer patient. It was not my idea of a fun job.

“Let’s look on the bright side, my darling,” I said finally. “The right ovary is clear.”

“That’s true,” Claudia replied, trying to be a little enthusiastic.

“So we might still have kids,” I said.

“If the chemo doesn’t make me infertile,” she replied gloomily.

Even the thought of being discharged from the hospital didn’t cheer her up much, especially when I told her we weren’t going home but to my mother’s house in Gloucestershire.

“Nick, you’ve got to be kidding” were her exact words.

“Nope,” I said. “And Mum is so looking forward to it.”

“But I want to go home,” Claudia whined. “I want my own bed.”

“But how would I look after you there when I have to go to work tomorrow?”

“And how, pray,” she asked drily, “are you going to go to work tomorrow from Cheltenham?” She paused briefly. “Come on, Nick, please let’s just go home.”

Now what could I say? I could hardly tell her I was worried we might get murdered on our own doorstep. She probably wouldn’t have believed me anyway.

I was convinced that Lichfield Grove in Finchley was far too dangerous for us and there was no way I was knowingly going to place my new fiancée into jeopardy. I’d been lucky last time, very lucky, and I’d had to run for my life. There was no way that Claudia would be able to run after having had two incisions through her abdominal wall. And who was to say I’d be lucky again?

And to live, I had to be lucky every time.

My best chance surely was to be where the assassin wouldn’t be and to remain where he couldn’t find me. He only had to be lucky once.

So, I decided, returning to Lichfield Grove was completely out of the question.

“My mother is so looking forward to it,” I said again. “And you yourself said it would be nice to go down and see her after the operation.”

“Yes,” she replied, “but I didn’t mean straight from the hospital.”

“Oh come on, darling,” I pleaded. “If your mother were still alive, we would probably go and stay with her.”

It was a low blow, well beneath the belt, and to someone who was in no state to receive one.

We rarely, if ever, spoke of Claudia’s parents. They had left her, aged eight, to spend the day with her grandmother, but they had never come back. Their Ford Escort had been driven off the cliff at Beachy Head straight down to the shingle beach some five hundred feet below.

The inquest had apparently returned a misadventure verdict rather than one of suicide. There had been some doubt as to which of the two had been driving at the time or whether some malfunction of the car had been the cause. But either way, Claudia blamed them both absolutely for leaving her alone in the world.

I thought it was quite likely the true reason behind all her weird paintings, but it was a topic that I raised rarely, and then with great care and tact.

“Nick, that’s hardly fair,” she said crossly.

“I’m sorry,” I said. “But I do want us to go straight to Mum’s.”

“But what about my things?” she said.

“You’ve got many of them here with you,” I said. “And I collected a few more yesterday from home.”

“And I definitely can’t go to your mother’s without my makeup,” she said defiantly.

“I’ve collected that too,” I said, trying not to sound too triumphant.

We went to my mother’s, but not before I’d received another tongue-lashing over my extravagance in hiring a car for the trip.

“And what’s wrong with our Mercedes?” Claudia had asked angrily.

“I thought you’d rather have a bit more space after your op,” I said, all sweetness and light. “The SLK is so cramped for the passenger.”

And rather conspicuous, I thought.

The man at the Hertz car rental center had tried to get me to hire his “Car of the Week,” a bright yellow Audi convertible with shiny chrome wheels. “It would suit you, sir,” he’d said eagerly. “Your sort of color. Makes a big statement.”

I had opted instead for a bog-standard, four-door blue sedan with not so much as a “Go faster!” stripe down the side. I wanted to blend into the background, not stand out from it.

I’d make my big statement in another way.

I’d told Claudia that my mother was looking forward to having us to stay, and she was, but only after I had talked her out of going to her regular Wednesday-afternoon whist drive in the village.

“Mum,” I’d said on the telephone, having woken her at ten to seven in the morning, “I just need to get us away for a few days.”

“But why, darling?” she’d replied. “What’s so sudden that you can’t come tomorrow?”

“Please, Mum,” I’d said to her in a tone like a seven-year-old trying to get his reluctant parent to buy him an ice cream.

“Oh, all right,” she’d said. “But I’ll have to go shopping for some food. And I really don’t like letting down the other players.”

“They’ll understand,” I’d said. “Just tell them your son is coming and bringing his fiancée home for the first time.”

She hadn’t been able to speak for a few moments. I had waited.

“Oh, darling,” she’d said eventually, her voice full of emotion, “is it really true or are you just saying that?”

“It’s really true,” I’d replied.

Hence, when we drove down the lane to her cottage, my mother was already outside to welcome us, in tears and almost unable to speak due to joy. She hugged Claudia like she’d never done before.

“What did you say to her?” Claudia asked me quietly as we went inside.

“I told her we were engaged,” I said. “We are, aren’t we?”

“Yes,” she said, smiling. “Of course we are. But what else did you tell her? You know, about the cancer?”

“Nothing,” I said. “I’ll leave that for you to decide.”

“I think not,” she said. “Not yet.”

“Fine,” I replied.

We went into the open-plan kitchen/dining room/living room, and Claudia sat down gingerly on a chair.

“What’s the matter, my dear?” my mother asked with concern. “You look like you’re in pain.”

“I am, Dorothy,” Claudia said. “I’ve just had an operation. A hernia. But I’ll be fine soon.”

“My dear,” said my mother, “come at once and put your feet up on the sofa.”

She fussed around her future daughter-in-law like a brooding mother hen and soon had Claudia propped up on the sofa with multiple pillows.

“There,” my mother said, standing back. “How about a nice cup of tea?”

“That would be lovely,” Claudia said, and she winked at me.

I left them to their bonding session while I took our things upstairs to the guest bedroom, negotiating the narrow, twisting staircase with our bags.

I sat on the bed and called the office using my mother’s cordless phone. Gregory should have returned from his long weekend away by now, and, with luck, Patrick would have convinced him over lunch not to hang, draw and quarter me, and even perhaps to let me back into the offices.