Simon Lelic: A Thousand Cuts

‘Forget the school,’ Cole said. ‘Forget Travis. Forget about your own fucking colleagues. What about you? What do you think is going happen to you if you decide to go ahead with this?’

‘I told you. It’s not my decision. The Samsons have made their own choice. All I’ve done is give them the information that no one else would. The information they deserve.’

‘Exactly, Inspector. Exactly. You’re already on suspension. What good do you think all of this is going to do for your career?’

‘My career,’ Lucia echoed. She turned back to face her boss. ‘I almost forgot.’ She took an envelope from her bag and held it out. ‘This is for you. This is the reason I came. It’s only a line or two but you’ll find it covers the important points.’

Cole frowned. He took the envelope from Lucia and checked each side, as though unsure of what it was he was holding. ‘You’re resigning?’

‘I’m resigning.’

‘You’re giving up. You’re quitting.’

‘Call it what you like. This job isn’t what I thought it was. It isn’t what it should be.’

‘That’s crap, Lucia. That’s idealistic crap. And this,’ he said, brandishing the envelope, ‘doesn’t get you off the hook.’ He tossed Lucia’s letter on to the desk. It skidded across the surface and off the other side. ‘What you did,’ he said. ‘What you’ve done. You could face charges. Criminal charges. You used privileged information from the Szajkowski investigation to incite Elliot Samson’s parents into launching a civil prosecution against the school. It’s abuse of office, Lucia. Mr Travis has every right to go straight to the IPCC.’

‘Mr Travis may go wherever he wishes,’ Lucia said. ‘If you like, I could even come up with a few suggestions myself.’

‘For Christ’s sake, Lucia! You’re not even going to win!’

Lucia shrugged. ‘Like I say, it’s not my business. I would assume, though, that winning hardly mattered. It’s not usually the court’s judgement that counts in a case like this.’

‘So what’s the point? What the hell is the point?’

‘Remember Samuel Szajkowski, Guv? He wasn’t tried but he was judged. Travis allowed him to be judged. And Leo Martin. Try mentioning Leo Martin’s name to Mr Travis. See what colour he turns.’

‘Leo Martin? Who the hell is Leo Martin?’

‘Just a boy. Just another boy who didn’t win. He won the argument though. The press made sure of that.’

Cole scoffed. ‘You’re talking in riddles, Lucia. You’re talking yourself into a shit heap of trouble, that’s what you’re doing.’

‘Tell me, Guv: why are we even having this conversation? If winning were all that mattered, why not just let the Samsons lose?’ Lucia took a step towards the desk. ‘You know as well as I do that even if their case comes to nothing, they will have achieved what they set out to achieve. Because, for Travis, there’ll be no hiding. There’ll be no vested interests to use as cover. You, your boss, whoever else is on the headmaster’s side: none of you will be able to help. You might even find yourself trapped in the same corner as the man you seem so eager to protect.’

Cole was shaking his head. ‘I told them you would be reasonable. I told them there wouldn’t be any need for threats. But it’ll happen, Lucia. If your friends go ahead with this, you’ll face the consequences. I won’t do anything to protect you.’

‘I wouldn’t ask you to. I wouldn’t dream of it.’

‘It’s worth it then. The cost, the personal cost, all for an inch or two buried at the bottom of page nine – it’s worth it to you?’

Lucia stooped and picked up the envelope from the floor. She placed it on Cole’s desk. ‘Samuel Szajkowski,’ she said. ‘He shot Donovan and then he fired at the stage. He was aiming at Travis, Guv. Not at the woman who betrayed him or the man who tormented him. He was aiming at Travis.’

‘I don’t care, Lucia. Travis doesn’t care.’

‘No. I’m sure he doesn’t. I’m sure, right now, he has other things on his mind. But he’ll have plenty of time to think about what it means once he’s settled into his retirement.’

Outside, they were waiting. They did not look like they were waiting but their lack of interest was unequivocal. Only Harry was openly watching for Lucia as she emerged. He raised his eyebrows. Lucia returned a grimace.

Heads lifted and tracked Lucia’s path across the office. She would have made her way straight to the stairwell had Harry not caught up with her first.

‘Lucia,’ he said. His hand on her shoulder guided her around. ‘I realise this may not be the best time… ’

Lucia looked beyond Harry’s shoulder. Cole’s door was still shut but Walter, seated at his desk, was regarding them with an expression somewhere between incredulity and delight. Rob and Charlie loitered, their leers cocked and at the ready. ‘It’s not a great time, Harry.’

‘No,’ he said. He glanced behind him. ‘No. But if you did in there what I imagine you went in to do… Well. I suppose we might not be seeing each other for a while.’

Lucia found herself smiling at Harry’s turn of phrase. ‘What’s up?’ she said.

‘Nothing. Nothing important. I just wanted to ask you something, that’s all.’ His voice was quieter now, though the others were still listening. They would still be able to hear. ‘I wanted to ask you whether you fancied going for a drink? Just to a pub or something. Not now obviously. At some point. Just whenever. Or not,’ Harry added. ‘You know, whatever. ’

‘Whatever?’ Lucia echoed.

Harry’s fingers rubbed at his forehead. ‘Not whatever. I didn’t mean whatever. All I meant was… Jesus Christ, Lucia. You’re not making this easy. All I meant was—’ he began again but Lucia placed her fingertips on his arm.

‘I know what you meant, Harry. I’d like that. I’d like to get a drink sometime. You know, whenever.’

Harry beamed. ‘Great,’ he said. ‘I’ll call you.’

‘Do,’ said Lucia. Smiling again, she made to turn away.

The sound of flesh slapping flesh stopped her. Walter was beating out a sluggish applause. He was grinning, Lucia saw, but not at her. Harry was his target now. Harry, who was moving eyes down towards his desk.

‘Bravo, Harry my lad. It looks like you’ve got yourself a date. And here we all were thinking you were a shitepoke.’ Rob and Charlie laughed. Walter looked across at them, affecting a puzzled expression. ‘Although thinking about it,’ he said, ‘does it really count if the bird you shag is a dyke?’

Harry was passing Walter’s chair. He stopped abruptly. ‘Watch your mouth, Walter. Watch your fucking mouth.’

Walter stood and Harry inched towards him.

‘Why do you do it, Walter?’ At the sound of Lucia’s voice, the two men turned to face her. ‘The jokes like that. This front you have. Why do you do it?’

Walter readied himself to reply but Lucia did not allow him the chance. ‘Is it because you don’t like women? Is that it?’ She was closing the distance between them. Walter leant back against his desk.

‘It all depends on the woman,’ said Walter. He laughed but the sound was hollow. Lucia was suddenly very close. When she spoke again, she spoke in his ear.

‘Is it that you don’t like women?’ she said again. ‘Or is it because it’s not women that you like?’

Walter recoiled. He tried to move away but Lucia held him still. ‘Because it’s hard, this job, for a woman. For someone like you, it must be so much harder.’

This time Walter pulled free. Lucia stepped away, ceding the ground.

‘What did she say?’ said Charlie. ‘Hey, Walter. What did she say?’

Walter kept his eyes on Lucia. His grin became a growl. ‘She didn’t say anything. She didn’t say fucking anything.’