Мишель Роуэн - Angel with Attitude

“Are these used in the spell?” Val asked after a while, looking skeptically at her basket full of chocolate chip cookies, Häagen-Dazs ice cream, and a head of romaine lettuce.

“No. Why?”

It seemed as though no one understood what emergency meant. Val tried to be patient, but it was getting more difficult with each passing moment. Julian had given the distinct impression the key wouldn’t be used for a while, but how long did that give them? And what if they were too late? She clung to the hope that Claire would be able to help her. If she couldn’t, then Val was out of options.

“I have faith in you, Valerie,” Barlow had said to her. “I know you’ll do what’s right.”

He was counting on her. She couldn’t let him down.

She wouldn’t.

“So . . .” Val said after they arrived at Claire’s little basement apartment. She had just seen a cockroach the size of her palm peeking out at them from behind a cookie jar shaped like

Oscar the Grouch, but was trying very hard to ignore it. “Do you summon demons often?”

Not the most usual of small talk, but in Claire’s case it would have to do. She’d been giving them the cold shoulder all the way back in her rusty Jetta. Despite Val’s repeated assurances that she hadn’t touched the woman’s boyfriend, Claire refused to believe her. Reggie had taken Val’s words of advice and hadn’t said a single thing since leaving the restaurant. He looked a little green in the whiskers. Serves him right, Val thought. The cheeseburger he’d consumed had been nearly the size of Reggie’s entire body. Tail excluded.

Claire was still ignoring her while she thumbed through her rather extensive collection of magic books. Some were printed by current and legitimate presses: A Goddess’s Guide to

Love Spells and Casseroles, Be a Witch, or Just Look Like One, Curse Your Cheating Man—

He Deserves It! The latter looked quite worn.

On a lower shelf, however, were a few less designed covers and spines. They looked very old, weathered, and cracked. It’s through these books Claire was searching.

“Here it is,” she said finally, pulling out a very small black leather-bound book only slightly larger than her hand. “The silly thing hides from time to time.”

“What hides?”

“The book.”

Val glanced at the bookcase, then back at Claire. “The book hides? Seriously?”

There was no joking in the witch’s expression. “Yes.”

“Why would it do something like that?”

“Just to piss me off.”

“Ah.”

“So, what kind of demon do you want to summon? There’s tons of varieties. They’re kind of like insects, that way. There are some little harmless ones. Some cute colorful ones. Then there’s the big scary ones with sharp teeth.”

“Yeah, let’s avoid those.”

Claire flipped through the little book. “All demons have category names, but most of my research material’s in Latin, and, well, I only took French in school. So that doesn’t help me out very much. So, what do you say? Little, big, wings, no wings? Totally your call. We just have to concentrate on being specific. Très specifique. That’s ‘very specific’ en Français.”

What kind of a demon did Val want to be her guide in finding Julian? Very good question.

“It would be good if it was something small”—she held her hand down at knee level—“Cute, easy to control. Speaks English.”

Claire looked thoughtful for a moment. “I think I can do small, cute, and speaks English.

How’s that?”

“Three out of four ain’t bad.”

Val heard a crash and turned to look at Claire’s open kitchen. “What was that?”

“That?” Claire looked over absently. “That one doesn’t speak English. And it’s not all that cute, either.”

“It’s a demon?”

“Pesky little thing, really. I was just experimenting last week, and boom.

“You summoned that?” All Val saw was black fur, beady eyes, and what quite possibly was a cigar hanging from its mouth. Then it flipped her the bird and disappeared in a puff of smoke.

She took a moment to compose herself. “How are you going to get rid of it?”

“I think I’m going to burn the place down and collect the insurance money,” Claire said matter-of-factly while she flipped through the tiny grimoire. “Let’s get started, shall we?”

Even though the balance of the known universe lay in Val’s hands—talk about pressure—she was having serious second thoughts about Claire. She worried that going with the very first demon summoner she could find wasn’t necessarily the best course of action, and wondered if maybe she should have at least checked the Yellow Pages first.

“Claire, I’m not sure about this.”

“Not sure about what?” She’d taken an opaque blue bottle off her shelf and begun to pour white powder from it in a four-by-four circle on the carpet.

“Maybe this isn’t such a good idea.”

Claire stopped pouring the powder and looked up at Val with obvious annoyance. “Do you have any idea how much this stuff costs?”

“I’ll pay you back. Eventually. It’s just . . . are you sure this is safe?”

She grinned, finished drawing the circle, and got to her feet. Earlier she’d changed into a purple robe that looked like a housecoat Val had seen recently at Wal-Mart. But Claire seemed to be acting more “mystical” since putting it on over the McDonald’s uniform.

“Nothing is safe, Val. That’s what makes it fun.”

“It’s just that I’ve met a couple of demons in the past couple of days”—she didn’t count

Alexa since she’d been reduced to a stain and a memory—“and I’m not too happy with either of them. Which is a complete understatement.”

Claire frowned at her. “So you’re saying you want to call this off? No summoning?”

Val chewed her bottom lip while considering other possibilities, which currently amounted to not a whole heck of a lot.

“Come on! Don’t be a party pooper,” Claire prompted. “It’ll be fun.”

“She’s a little bit crazy,” Reggie piped up from behind a throw cushion. “That’s what I love about her.”

Claire’s eyes narrowed and she glared at him from across the room. He ducked back out of sight. Val was planning on trying to convince Claire to turn Reggie back into a human before they left, but she wanted the witch to be in a better mood before that subject was broached.

“First of all,” Claire said after a moment, “every time I summon a demon I learn something new.”

Val blinked at that. “Every time? How many times have you done this?”

She shrugged. “A girl’s got to have a hobby. Especially when she has a cheating boyfriend.”

“I didn’t cheat!” Reggie yelled. “A kiss is not cheating!”

She ignored him. “Why don’t I add in some precautions?” She pulled a small chunk of quartz crystal out of the pocket of her robe. “See this? All of the summoning power will be focused into this crystal. While I have it, the demon will have to do whatever I say. Cool, huh? Just figured that out recently. It sure would have helped with my current houseguest. Oh, and as a bonus, your demon won’t be able to lie. That’ll be a big help since demons are such major liars.”

“Tell me about it.” She thought about Nathaniel and the obviously false words he used to try to get her to come to Hell with him. As if it was a fabulous all-inclusive vacation instead of eternal damnation. Did he really think he was fooling anybody?

She frowned. Jerk.

“So you can fix it so the demon will obey you and can’t lie.”

“Isn’t that what I just said?”

Val crossed her arms. “I just want to make sure I understand you correctly.”