Michael Pearce - The Mingrelian Conspiracy

‘He’ll be spending a good time on the water, what with the river trip,’ said McPhee.

‘I’ll turn to security later,’ said Paul. ‘The first question, though, is what we’re going to do with him while he’s here. The Khedive would like to reproduce as far as possible the visit of Duke Nicholas’s uncle, the Crown Prince, when he came here to open the Suez Canal.’

‘Out of the question!’ said Finance Department immediately. ‘Cost too much!’

‘ “As far as possible”,’ said Paul. ‘Those are the keywords, I think. Surely we can accede to His Royal Highness’s wishes to that extent? Of course, we may not be able to go as far as he would like-’

‘As long as we bear in mind budgetary constraints,’ said Finance Department.

‘Just so. Now, Mr. Abd-es-Salem is here representing the Court, and I wonder if he could tell us what His Royal Highness has in mind with respect to the programme?’

‘Well, last time the Khedive commissioned an opera-’

‘No!’ said Finance Department quickly.

‘-and built the new Opera House.’

‘My God!’ said Finance Department.

‘After consideration, the Khedive would not, perhaps, wish to go so far this time. But he does feel that, in view of its centrality on the previous visit, opera should have at least some part in the programme-’

‘Does he now?’ said Paul, sitting up.

‘Out of the question!’ said Finance Department. ‘Too costly!’

‘Oh, come!’

‘That was what bankrupted Egypt in the first place,’ said Finance Department.

‘What better thing to be bankrupted by?’ murmured Paul.

‘Actually, I must support the Khedive,’ said Owen, who thought there was a chance of getting a performance of Aida out of this. ‘I feel that since His Royal Highness has expressed the wish to reproduce as closely as possible the original arrangements, we ought to do the best we can to oblige him.’

Mr. Abd-es-Salem flashed him a grateful glance.

‘If you’re thinking of Aida,’ said Finance Department smugly, ‘you can think again. Aida wasn’t actually performed on the original visit. It was commissioned for the opening of the Canal but wasn’t ready on time. It was performed some time after.’

‘All the more reason for the Grand Duke to be able to see it now,’ suggested Paul.

‘Aida is completely out of the question,’ said Finance Department with emphasis. ‘I have this straight from the Treasury in London.’

‘They actually specified there was to be no Aida?’

‘Certainly. Opera is something they really know about in the Treasury.’

‘We could dispense with the animals,’ said Paul temptingly.

‘Animals?’ said the major.

‘Live animals were a feature of the original production,’ said Finance Department. ‘Lots of them! Actually, it wouldn’t be a good idea,’ he said to Paul. ‘Suppose the Grand Duke got eaten?’

‘We could keep him away from them. Owen could see to that-’

‘No animals,’ said Finance Department firmly. ‘And no Aida, either. Of course, there is no reason why you shouldn’t choose another opera. The Treasury is not opposed to opera in principle. Far from it.’

‘Well, that is a helpful suggestion,’ said Paul. ‘Now-’

The Army had been fidgeting for some time.

‘Could we get on to the real business?’

Paul raised his eyebrows.

‘I thought that was the real business,’ he said.

‘What about security?’

‘We’ve got to agree on the programme first, haven’t we? Right, let’s move on. There will be a Grand Ball, of course…’

‘There could be difficulties,’ said Owen.

‘What difficulties?’

‘Well, dresses. That kind of thing.’

Paul glanced at his notes.

‘No, this has already been decided. The Consul-General’s wife-’

‘A March Past?’ suggested the Army, some time later. ‘March Past?’

‘The Khedive reviewing his troops.’

‘There may be international observers,’ said Paul. ‘I don’t think we should make our military presence too obvious. We could have a jolly procession, I suppose.’

‘The Khedive would like that,’ said Mr. Abd-es-Salem. ‘In fact, he would wish to take part in it himself. He could ride at the head with the Grand Duke in an open landau.’

‘Is that a good idea?’ asked Owen.

‘Why not?’ said Mr. Abd-es-Salem, surprised.

‘Because it would make it easy for someone to take a pot shot at him.’

‘The Khedive feels safe with his people,’ said Mr. Abd-es-Salem reprovingly.

‘I was thinking of the Grand Duke,’ said Owen hastily and untruly.

‘Surely there is no risk of that?’

‘Cairo is a city of many nationalities. And not all of them are sympathetic to Russia.’

‘Even so-’

‘The Balkan countries, for instance.’

‘Ah, yes,’ said Mr. Abd-es-Salem thoughtfully. ‘The Balkans!’

‘The Mingrelians!’ added Owen, for the benefit of the Army.

‘My God, yes!’ said the major. ‘The Mingrelians!’

‘Round them up,’ said Shearer. ‘Round them all up!’

‘All of them?’ said Owen. ‘There are over twenty thousand people from various Balkan countries in Cairo alone. The place is like a miniature Balkans. It’s a potential powder keg, I can tell you. I think this visit is crazy. Why don’t we call the whole thing off?’

‘Call it off?’ said Mr. Abd-es-Salem, aghast. ‘His Royal Highness has set his heart on it!’

‘I’m afraid we’ve gone too far down the road to call it off now,’ said Paul. ‘Although I agree with you about the potential threat.’

‘Threat?’ said Mr. Abd-es-Salem, with considerable asperity. ‘Are you saying that the British can no longer maintain order? Even with an Army?’

‘Certainly not!’ said the major indignantly.

‘We can handle it,’ said Captain Shearer.

‘Can you?’ said Owen quickly. ‘Well, there’s a lot to be said for-’

‘No chance!’ said Paul firmly. ‘It has already been decided that the Mamur Zapt has overall responsibility for the security arrangements. But a good try!’ he added, turning to Owen.

‘You again?’ said the cafe owner. He was sitting with his legs heavily bandaged and propped across a chair in front of him.

‘I like coffee,’ said Owen.

‘You don’t think you could enjoy it somewhere else?’

‘I especially like it here.’

‘You get in the way, you know.’

‘You mean, the men won’t come while I’m here? Isn’t that a good thing?’

‘I don’t know. They’ll come again when you’re not here.’

‘I could leave someone with you.’

‘They’re big blokes.’

‘This is a big bloke.’

‘Hanging around all day drinking coffee?’

‘He could work for you. In fact, it would be better if he did. You could say he had come up from the country.’

‘Why don’t you just go away?’ said the cafe owner.

‘I’m like the other lot. I’m never going to go away.’

The cafe owner cursed softly.

‘You get me down,’ he said. ‘You really do.’

‘I’m your only way out,’ said Owen. ‘You’ll be glad of me. Later.’

‘A lot later,’ said the cafe owner. ‘When I’m in heaven.’

‘Even before. It’s just the next bit that’s hard.’

‘Why pick the hard way?’

‘Because if you pick the other way, it never ends. You don’t just pay once. You go on paying. You pay all the time. They come more often. And after a while they ask for more. And then more. And then more still. In the end you’re working only for them. All you’ve built up is theirs. Look, I know what it takes to build up a place like this, what it costs you. It costs you years of your life and you’ve only got one life. Going to give it all away, now, are you?’