Рита Браун - Santa Clawed

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Bestselling authors Rita Mae
Brown and her feline partner,
Sneaky Pie Brown, are back for
the holidays in a mystery
featuring Mary Minor “Harry”
Haristeen, the sleuthing cats Mrs. Murphy and Pewter, and
corgi Tee Tucker. Can they save
the season from a killjoy who’s
decided to gift the festive little
town…with murder?
As Harry well knows, there’s hardly a place on earth cozier
than Crozet, Virginia, at
Christmastime. The snowflakes
drifting lazily down, the soft
glow of the winter light, the
sound of old carols in the streets…even cats Mrs. Murphy
and Pewter get into the spirit
batting ornaments and climbing
the holiday tree. In fact, it’s this
year’s tree that Harry and her
husband, Fair, have gone to fetch when they find the one
they’ve chosen grimly decorated
with a dead body.
The tree farm is run by The
Brothers of Love, a
semimonastic organization that tends to AIDS patients. The
brothers live in a monastery
atop the scenic Blue Ridge
Mountains. Harry is surprised to
find an old high-school friend
associated with The Brothers of Love. Christopher Hewitt wasn’t
a bad man, but good works
weren’t exactly one of his
priorities. But then, if even
Scrooge could turn over a new
leaf, certainly Chris could. And after the scandal that all but
destroyed his life, there were
probably few in Crozet who
needed the gift of a second
chance more.
Harry knows she shouldn’t take it personally, but it was her tree
that someone left the corpse
under. Now, as the season
grows merrier, a murderer is
growing bolder. One by one,
prominent men of Crozet are being crossed off Christmas
shopping lists and added to the
morgue. And if Harry and her
four-legged helpers aren’t very
good—and very careful—this
Christmas may be her last.

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Once in the house, Cooper closed the door and leaned against it.

“Harry, bless you.”

“Drink?” Fair was anxious to know what had happened.

“Beer. I want a big, fat, cold beer.”

He opened the refrigerator and handed her a St. Pauli Girl, her favorite.

Within minutes all were seated in the living room, Harry upright now, her feet on the coffee table.

Cooper first told them about visiting the monastery and the forlorn abandoned brothers who’d been locked into their rooms, except for Brother Luther, who’d been knocked out. “As it happens, the North Carolina state police picked up the perps as they headed for the coast. Brother Morris wanted the others to disperse, but no one trusted him to give them the money once they were safe. A falling- out among thieves.” She half-smiled, then took a sip. “And Brother Luther and Brother Howard were right: Brother Morris had a separate account; he was definitely blackmailing men. But he’s not a killer.”

“Good Lord,” Fair exclaimed.

“Where does Racquel come in?” Harry burst with curiosity.

“Bryson had had affairs at the hospital. The ones she initially pounced on over the years were with women. But as time went on, he couldn’t submerge his true nature. She sensed it. Over the last year and a half, his constant visits to the monastery for ‘medical reasons’ sent her red flags up. She started snooping. He really did think he was smarter than anyone else, didn’t take too many precautions. He assumed no one would dream he had fallen in love with Speed. Racquel found condoms, the occasional cryptic note in what seemed to be a man’s handwriting. Bryson made two fatal mistakes: he underestimated his wife, and he fell in love with Speed. At least that’s what Racquel says.

“Racquel initially thought he was in love with Christopher.” Cooper took a breath. “She was so humiliated that her husband was sleeping with a man that she lost it. She confronted him. He denied it.”

“Did she overpower them in some fashion?” Fair asked.

“No. Racquel is very attractive. She offered herself to them. Remember, both men like women, or liked them. All she had to do was slip behind them and slit their throats before they knew what hit them. Neither man dreamed he was in danger.”

“Didn’t their murders upset Bryson? If he was in love with Speed he would be devastated,” Fair said.

“He tried to hide it, but he was. His suppressed grief made her even angrier,” Cooper said.

“And Bryson didn’t suspect his wife?” Harry wondered how Bryson could be so obtuse.

“He was getting nervous, but he didn’t think Racquel was the killer. He thought he had her under his thumb. Apart from his inborn arrogance, he had a touch of smugness about women. He thought men were superior, or so Racquel says. He didn’t treat her badly, but she felt tremendous humiliation, and her desire for revenge overcame even her maternal affection for the boys. She never thought she’d be caught, though. She was so blinded by rage she didn’t think about being separated from her sons.”

“Those poor kids. Their mother killed their father. They love both parents.” Harry felt terrible for the boys. “Do you think Racquel would have killed me?” she asked Cooper.

“Probably. I don’t think she wanted to, but if it came down to your life versus her freedom, she would have shot you.”

“Lucky I have fast friends.” Harry dangled her arms over each kitty, now in her lap, and Tucker on the floor.

“No one messes with us,” Pewter bragged.

“Here’s something: Brother Morris won’t confess to blackmail. Big surprise. He only says people gave as their hearts moved them.”

“That’s not what was moving,” Fair said laconically.

The two women laughed.

Harry then inquired, “He’s not saying where the money is, is he?”

“Hell, no. He’ll hire a great lawyer, serve his time, and come out to unearth the money. Here’s something else: he admitted that Bryson was generous and that Bill Keelo made a sizable Christmas donation.”

“Bill is currently in jail, since he was uncooperative.” Cooper liked the idea of the lawyer cooling his heels. “Alex swears he’s not involved, but he fits the description of the man who accompanied Racquel to the coin store.” She paused. “He’s in love with her, of course.”

“Bill Keelo.” Harry was surprised.

“Hoping to draw attention from himself, all that homophobic rant.” Cooper smiled ruefully. “People can be pretty nasty. When they can’t face who and what they are, it’s a real cluster you- know- what.”

“Yep.” Harry liked the tang in her tea.

“I’m willing to bet that Racquel’s lawyer will use in her defense that she was frightened that Bryson would commit incest with their sons.” Cooper knew how legal things

worked.

“Gross.” Harry wrinkled her nose.

“And it will be very effective.” Fair, too, had seen enough legal arguments to know some slick lawyer could get Sherman’s March to the Sea reduced to trespassing.

“So Bryson never went out for milk?”

“He did. But he thought he was going for an assignation at Barracks Road. Racquel had sent him a text message, name withheld, to meet for sex. The man was a fool for sex. She howled with laughter when she described walking up to the Tahoe. She’d parked behind the buildings, then walked out into the parking lot. She said if she sits in jail forever, she’ll cherish that moment when he realized the game was up and he wasn’t half as smart as he thought he was. She had a gun on him and marched him to the fountain. Then she put the gun to his temple, told him to hold still, and slit his throat. He didn’t expect that, either. She’s totally unrepentant.”

“And the boys will never admit their mother left the house on Christmas Eve. I expect they knew she’d left the house,” Harry said.

“Probably. What a burden they’ll carry.”

“What’s the significance of the obol?” Fair inquired.

“To throw us off. She won’t tell us who accompanied her when she stole them. She laughed again when we brought that up. She said they’ll all go to hell and she paid the fare. She’s gleeful.”

Suddenly Pewter shot off Harry’s lap, raced for the tree, and climbed to the top, where she batted the gold star. “I’m the top of the top.”

“Demented.” Tucker sighed. “I saved the day! Me. Me. Me.” “There’s no living with her.” Tucker sighed. “Can’t beat ’em, join ’em.” Mrs. Murphy leapt off the sofa and

climbed the tree, hanging on the trunk across from Pewter. The Christmas tree swung to and fro, the balls tinkling when they touched one another.

Harry got up and reached into the tree to steady it by grasping the trunk. Her reward was to be pricked by the sharp needles.

The cats hollered, “We’re the tops, we’re the cat’s pajamas.”

It was just as well that Cole Porter had gone to his reward and that Harry had no idea what those two were shouting about.

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