Iris Johansen: Bonnie

“Yes, maybe not the way I wanted it.” His hand stroked her hair. “How are you doing?”

“Mixed-up. Happy, sad, angry. Bonnie may be able to see beyond the act and forgive, but I’m not there yet. It may take me a long time.”

She could feel him nod but didn’t lift her head. She wanted to stay here hidden in his arms. “But I can’t hate him. All these years, and I can’t hate him. Because she never hated him. From the beginning, she wanted to help him, ease him.”

“Yes.” He was silent a moment. “Do you remember that first week after Bonnie was taken when we were doing the interviews with people who had claimed to have seen Bonnie?”

“Yes, they were all disasters.”

“Except for one. That vicious woman who claimed to be a psychic and said that she’d seen Bonnie the night after she’d been reported missing. She told you that Bonnie had been murdered.”

“She just wanted to hurt me.”

“Yes, but she said Bonnie was trailing after a man and trying to get his attention. She said he wouldn’t pay any attention to her. You asked her if Bonnie was afraid of him, and she said no.”

Memories of that night were flooding back to Eve. “Even then, Bonnie was trying to get through to Danner and tell him that she forgave him?” A man in a torment of guilt, pushing Bonnie away, denying her existence, denying his responsibility for her death. Yet trying to protect her in the only way he knew how. “And she kept trying and never gave up. Even when she sensed the end coming, she knew she had to be there for him.”

Danner’s luminous expression in that final moment.

Perfect faith, perfect love…

She felt tears sting her eyes again. No, she would not cry.

She drew a shaky breath and took a step back. “Did you reach 911? I suppose we should call them back and tell them Danner won’t need them.”

He nodded. “The EMTs should be here soon anyway. They were on the other side of the canyon with Ben.”

“Is he still alive?”

“Yes, but they’re going to have to airlift him out of here to the hospital in Columbus. It may be touch-and-go.”

“I want to go with him. He saved your life, Joe.” She paused. “Ben said something about…”

“Bonnie? She touched him. He had dreams about her.”

She’d touched all of them. Dreams and visions and a love that lasted beyond death.

“I want to talk to him.”

But would she get the chance? Would he be with Bonnie, too?

Joe slipped his arm around her waist. “We’ll go to the ranger station and get a ride to the hospital. We’d better tell Catherine what we’re doing.” He turned to Catherine, who was several yards behind him. “Catherine, we need to go to the hospital. Do you want to-”

“I’ll stay with Gallo.” Catherine’s gaze was fixed on Gallo, kneeling beside Danner. “Do what you have to do.” She started toward him. “I’ll be in touch later.”

Then she stopped and turned to Eve.

Eve stiffened with surprise. Catherine’s golden skin was paler, her eyes wide with shock. Eve had never seen her so discomposed. “Are you okay?”

Catherine nodded jerkily. “As good as I can be. I just wanted to say that I-” She muttered a curse and whirled back again and started toward Gallo. “I just wanted to say I’m sorry. I thought you were all a little crazy. I didn’t believe you. Hell, maybe I’m crazy, too.”

Eve froze, her gaze on Catherine, who had reached Gallo and was standing beside him.

“She saw her, Joe,” she whispered. “She saw Bonnie.”

“And it scared the hell out of her.” Joe pulled Eve toward the trail. “I can sympathize. I remember the first time I saw Bonnie. But she’ll have to deal with it herself. You can’t do it for her.”

He was right. Perhaps later she could comfort, help Catherine, but now she was too exhausted and emotionally spent to do anything but try to get through the hours ahead.

But why had Catherine been able to see Bonnie when only those who were close to her daughter had ever been able to see her?

Don’t ask. Just accept.

Bonnie’s choice.

BEN WAS IN SURGERY WHENEve and Joe reached the hospital. But Father Barnabas was in the waiting room and had spoken to the doctors.

“It’s critical,” the priest said. “But the doctors say he has a chance. The nurse just came by to tell me they’re finishing up now.”

“You know that Danner is dead?” Joe asked. “The police told you?”

“No. Ben told me.”

“What?”

“Right before he went into surgery. He said that Ted wasn’t here anymore, but that it was okay.” He turned to Eve. “Are you all right?”

She nodded. “Ben told you?” It shouldn’t have surprised her. Just the few minutes she’d spent with him had revealed his connection with Bonnie.

“I promised I’d try to keep from killing Danner,” Joe said. “He came along to try to protect him.”

“And he knows you did try,” the priest said. “And I don’t think that the reason he came along was to protect Danner. Maybe that was his initial reason, but it changed. He was sticking closer to you than glue.”

“He was protecting Joe?” Eve nodded slowly. “Maybe you’re right.”

“I’m right.” Father Barnabas smiled. “And here’s something else that I’m going to be right about. The doctors weren’t sure that Ben would survive this surgery, but he was sure. He told me that she said that it wasn’t his time.” He tilted his head. “And I wondered… a saintly visitation? Or the little girl Ted Danner was so obsessed with?”

“Bonnie,” Eve said.

“Bonnie,” the priest repeated. “He was so afraid of her. I wanted to be with Ted, to talk to him one more time, to give him comfort. He was in such torment.”

“Yes.” She met his eyes. “But not in the end. And he wasn’t afraid of Bonnie any longer.”

“A miracle?”

Perhaps not the way the priest meant it. But since the day of her birth, Bonnie had been so very special, a wonderful, magical gift. It was no wonder that she had been able to give that grace to everyone around her. “Yes, a miracle, Father.”

“YOU LOOK LIKE A SURGEON.”Catherine’s gaze ran up and down Eve’s loose blue-green tunic and pants when she came into the waiting room two hours later. “Have you changed professions?”

“I borrowed the clothes from one of the nurses on the floor. I took a shower, but my clothes were practically falling into shreds after those days in the woods. Joe wanted to stay here until they let him see Ben, and I wanted to be with him.”

Catherine looked down at herself. “I’m not much better than you, but I’ll wait until I can get to a motel. I’ll pick up some clothes for you and drop them off here. How is the boy?”

“He’ll live. The doctors said it was touch-and-go.” She smiled. “Ben said that there would be no problem. He had it on the best of authority.”

Catherine looked away. “I’ve been thinking it over and what I thought I saw could have been a hallucination induced by stress.”

“It could be.”

“That would be the most comfortable explanation.” She looked back at Eve. “I’ve never gone for the safe or comfortable. It’s not my nature.” She smiled recklessly. “I tend to dive into the volcano and hope that the rope around my waist holds.”

“And are you diving into my volcano, Catherine?”

“Yes. I saw a little girl in a Bugs Bunny T-shirt kneeling by Danner. She was… incredible.”

Eve nodded. “More than you’ll ever know.”

“I hope that’s true. I don’t want to know or see more than I did today.”

“And you may not. I don’t know why you saw my daughter. I assumed that she appeared only to those to whom she was close. Maybe this is a rare instance and won’t be repeated.”