T. Novan - Words Heard In Silence / Xena Uber

Charlie shifted as she lifted the tray off the edge of the bed and took his empty cup. "Of course, Miss Rebecca. It is your bed," Almost under his breathe, he added, "and I am always comfortable when you are beside me." As she settled into the bed, he reached out and took her hand in his, holding it gently.

Chapter 8

Friday November 18, 1864

Rebecca placed the washcloth on the rim of the basin. She glanced back at Charlie who was finally sleeping restfully. She had gotten very little sleep the previous night. The Colonel had been tremendously fussy, thrashing about in the bed. She had done everything she could, sitting up most of the night continuously wiping his forehead and neck with cool cloths.

She reached for her chemise, slipping into it before reaching for her dress. She had considered taking the time for a proper bath, but did not want to be away from Charlie for that long. So, she simply prepared a basin, stripped out of her clothes and had a quick washing.

As she buttoned her dress, she watched Charlie. He curled up and rolled over, reaching to her side of the bed and pulling her pillow to him. She could not help but smile, for some reason she was still trying to understand, in her heart that action made her very happy.

She finished dressing then went to his side, giving him a tender kiss on the cheek. "Sleep well Charlie, we have another long day ahead of us.

--*--

She left the room, going first to the rooms that would house Dr. Walker. They were as ready as they could be, but by no means what Rebecca wished they could have been. Her home had once been so beautiful and now it had been reduced to a mere shell of its former glory.

Knowing there was nothing more she could do for the room, she closed the door then went downstairs. She was putting the kettle on to boil when there was a rapping on the back door. She opened it to find, four faces staring back at her, each of them holding two small bags. The young man spoke first.

"Mrs. Gaines?"

"Yes."

"Yes, Ma’am." He pulled his hat from his head. "I am Reg," he gestured in turn to the women he was with. "This is Sarah, Beulah and Lizbet. Colonel Redmond told us to come to you."

"Ah, yes. Come in." She allowed them in, appraising them as they stood before her. Charlie certainly knew how to pick servants. "Well, I will tell you that I am just starting to put Gaines Cove back in order and it will require very hard work to do so. You are not afraid of hard work are you?"

"No, Ma’am." Reg answered for them. "We are very grateful to you and the Colonel for the work. We promise to do right by you and the Colonel, Mrs. Gaines. "

"And the Colonel and I will do right by you." She gestured to the stairs. "You will find quarters upstairs on the third floor. Go put your things away then come back down so I can get you started. And be very quiet going up the stairs, the Colonel is under the weather and resting in bed yet this morning."

"Yes Ma’am."

--*--

Charlie slept until mid-morning, when he was awakened, not by Rebecca as he had expected, but by Jocko, who came bustling in with a pan of hot water and a razor.

"Well, Colonel C. How are we feeling this morning? Bright and chipper, I assume."

Charlie regarded his batman blearily. This degree of ‘‘chipper’ when Charlie still felt like he had a ton of wet bricks on his chest was less than wonderful. Particularly when he had been hoping to see gentle green eyes and instead was looking into brown ones that twinkled maliciously.

"We will be having company today. Colonel Polk needs his orders; Dr. Walker is arriving, and its time for you to be the Colonel again. So I thought I would come over and fix you up."

Charlie groaned. "Ok. Just be gentle. I feel like I have been dragged through hell and back."

"A nice shave and some clean clothes will fix you right up again, I promise."

Charlie lay back and closed his eyes as Jocko bustled around him, lathering his face and then methodically removing the lather and the whisper of facial hair. Years of shaving had coarsened some of those very fine facial hairs so that in reality, Charlie did have a little bit of a beard. The shaving, while originated as part of his disguise, was a real need now. The two were silent as Jocko applied the brush full of soap froth, and then began removing it and the companion stubble with the straight edged razor.

As Jocko shaved him, Charlie turned to his oldest friend for some advice. The dream of his mother the previous night had shaken him more than he was willing to admit, even to himself, and Rebecca’s gentle tending had added to his confusion.

"Jocko, am I wrong for playing the role I do?"

"What do you mean, wrong, Charlie? You are a damned fine officer. You take care of your men, you get the job done with minimal casualties, and you are a fine tactician. You win battles. If you appeared to be a woman, you could not do the things you do so well. They would not let you."

Charlie snorted. "Well, I have been being a soldier and a man for so long, I do not think I could go back to wearing skirts if my life depended on it."

Jocko stopped for a moment and looked his old friend and commanding officer in the eye. "Charlie, for you to survive, you had to be a man, to act like a man, look like a man, and think like a man. In every way that counts, you are a man. So why torment yourself?"

Charlie and Jocko were silent for a minute. Charlie thought about the raw truth in what Jocko had said. It was true; to survive, Charlie had to be a man. Most of the time, he thought of himself as a man. It was only in the safety and seclusion of his room, late at night when he had undressed and released the bindings around him that he remembered just who he was.

Jocko’s mind had traveled elsewhere. "So, you wore skirts? Now that is a sight I would pay money to have seen. Long hair, too? My, my, Colonel C. Were you the proper young southern lady? I think not." With a snicker and a flourish, Jocko finished the shave with a splash of bay rum.

"All right, boss, time for you to get up and out. I brought your uniform. There is warm water in the basin, so get yourself up and dressed. When you are ready, I set up a desk in the back parlor, and there is a nice warm fire going. Miss Rebecca has said you can use it as your office until you get better. Colonel Polk will be here at 9:00 and Dr. Walker is due in on the train at 10:30. Your dispatches are waiting for you, as well as the reports from each company."

"Thank you –– I think. Now go on. I will be down in a bit."

Charlie hauled himself out of bed. He was still feeling feverish and shaky, but the needs of the regiment were more important than his desire to lie in bed for the day. A quick glance at his pocket watch told him that he needed to get a move on to meet Polk. Jocko had been thoughtful. He had brought the uniform trousers instead of the usual riding britches –– and the soft, low cut dress boots that went with them, instead of the snug knee-high riding boots. Even so, just getting dressed tired him out. He sat on the edge of the bed for a few minutes before tackling the stairs.

Finally, he carefully worked his way down the stairs. He met Rebecca coming out of the small parlor just as he was approaching the door. She took his arm and walked back into the room with him.

"I wish you could stay in bed for another day or two."

"To be honest with you, so do I. However, the needs of the men go on, regardless of how I feel."

"Well, at least you can stay warm in here. I found a woolen shawl that my husband used on cold days to help keep you warm. And I just put a pot of that mint tea you liked on the hob. And if you get too tired, you can lie down on the davenport. There is an afghan you can use or the lap rug if you need them."