Xu Xiaobin - Dunhuang Dream

So that was Yu’er. Strangely, Xingxing was moved at the sight of Yu’er like Zhang Shu, but Wuye was not. Wuye said the only thing he noticed at the time was the glittering array and that he was examining her dress and ornaments rather than her face. In short, after seeing Yu’er, Xingxing completely forgot her original purpose and asked her straightaway if she would let her paint her portrait. Yu’er consented without the slightest hesitation. But the woman sitting beside Yu’er eyed Xingxing with suspicion. Then she spoke to Yu’er, saying, “How can you let someone paint your portrait, silly girl?”

“Madame, I am a painter,” asserted Xingxing, as she took out her ID from the Academy of Art.

“Yugur people do not pose for painters.” The old woman sat bolt upright and looked straight ahead. “You’ll steal my girl’s soul.”

That day, despite uttering all manner of niceties, she was unable to gain the confidence of the old woman. Later, Wuye understood what the trouble was. He took out the only bill he had — a fifty-yuan note — and placed it on the table. Only then did her objections cease.

The portrait Xingxing painted of Yu’er still hangs in the gallery of the Central Academy of Fine Art. If judged solely by this painting, then Yu’er was not a woman whose beauty launched a thousands ships. But it’s said that a true beauty cannot be painted nor photographed. The same reason that no great book can be made into a successful film or TV show. Truly brilliant natural objects can only be created once by the creator, and any human copy is doomed to failure. But Xingxing insisted that she had captured Yu’er’s expression. She finished the portrait in a matter of two weeks. While Xingxing was painting her portrait, Yu’er wasn’t allowed to move and had to be as still as a rooted plant. One day, Xingxing just had to ask her if she could do yoga. She answered in the affirmative. “The Buddha sat in meditation under the Bodhi tree for forty-nine days before realizing perfect enlightenment and becoming a Buddha.” Speaking reverently, Yu’er continued, “But I’m not that good. There are a lot of girls who practice yoga here, and I’m not much to speak of.”

Yu’er’s modest attitude left Xingxing with an even better impression of her. Xingxing began making all sorts of good dishes for her, but Yu’er didn’t seem interested in food. This only made Xingxing admire her even more, finding her elegant and refined.

After Yu’er became Xingxing’s guest of honor, Wuye moved out. After he moved out, he became even more important to Xingxing. Zhang Shu, on the other hand, visited frequently. As soon as Xingxing picked up her brush, he’d knock at the door, come in and sit quietly watching. Sometimes he would make a comment. Xingxing discovered that as soon as Zhang Shu arrived, Yu’er would look even more beautiful than usual. But she could never detect a thing on Zhang Shu’s impassive face.

6

One day, Xingxing said to Zhang Shu, “It wouldn’t be hard for me to become a Buddha if I wanted to. Shakyamuni Buddha did nothing but sit and meditate under the Bodhi tree. Some people say he meditated for seven days, others say it was forty-nine days, but that’s unimportant. Anyway, the night he became a Buddha he attained knowledge of his former incarnations and those of others as well as attaining knowledge of good and evil early in the evening; in the middle of the night, he obtained divine vision and universal knowledge; late in the evening, he attained supernatural insight into the ending of the stream of transmigration and knowledge of birth and death. Isn’t this form of ‘samadhi’ the same as today’s qigong ? Doesn’t qigong refer to divine vision or opening the eye of wisdom? But few people today understand Shakyamuni’s moral conduct, and despite maintaining outward forms of practice it is difficult to become a Buddha.”

“You’ve always got so many strange ideas,” laughed Zhang Shu, “and you remember all this stuff.”

“On top of that, I’ve found that there is always something unusual about the births of great people. Jesus was born of a virgin; as for Shakyamuni, his mother Maya bore him from her right side. As far as I can tell, most of them seemed to lack a mother’s love when small — it’s an inherent deficiency — otherwise they wouldn’t view the opposite sex with such prejudice and enmity.”

“That’s probably the case and why they became the founders of religions.”

“However, I don’t think Jesus Christ matches Shakyamuni in terms of wisdom or morality, and is even inferior to our own Confucius and Laozi and so on.”

Zhang Shu and Xingxing sat on a stone bench in the courtyard behind the guesthouse. It was four o’clock in the afternoon and the sun was still strong. The shade of the tree covered their heads and the sunlight stretched their shadows out for some distance.

Wuye approached from the distance.

“Is the portrait done?” asked Wuye, smiling politely at Zhang Shu before quickly turning to Xingxing.

“No, I’m taking a break today.” Xingxing took her cap from the stone bench, but Wuye didn’t take a seat. Instead he leaned against the tree.

“Xingxing was just presenting her informed opinion on why Jesus does not compare to Shakyamuni,” said Zhang Shu, smiling.

“Do you really believe that?” asked Wuye, his sleepy eyes suddenly opening wide.

“I’m not the only one. Lots of great people, such as Rousseau and Nietzsche, thought so, too.”

“Whoever thinks so is greatly mistaken. They’re just downright wrong,” said Wuye, somewhat peeved.

“Mistaken in what way?”

“Jesus is far away greater than all these people. In addition to being a philosopher and wise man, he was also a true social reformer. Just read the New Testament and you’ll see.”

“I’ve not only read the New Testament, I’ve read the Old Testament as well,” Xingxing replied in a sarcastic tone. “It’s probably better not to read it. After reading it, God’s holy love amounts to nothing. The Christians say that ‘God loves the world, but God’s love is not unconditional.’ First of all, people must love him; they must become his slaves and sacrificial lambs before he will love them in return. Moreover, that love must be cruelly tested. Think of Job with his sincere faith in God, who, simply because God is bored and makes a bet with Satan, loses family and fortune — his ten children are killed, he suffers from leprosy. Isn’t that a little excessive?”

“But in return Jehovah bestows on him even more than he once had along with his fortune and his children.”

“The only reason for this is to demonstrate his own power by toying with a person’s dignity! How could he be compensated? Property is one thing, but how could he be compensated for his dead children? What is more, can this kind of ‘bestowal’ and ‘love’ be placed on par? Jehovah’s love of man is clearly a falsehood. His punishments and gifts alike serve only to assert that he is ‘God of the omnipotent,’ that’s all. Buddhism is different. At least it is more real than Christianity. Nietzsche claimed that Buddhism is the only religion in history that is empirically true. There was, in fact, a Shakyamuni, whereas God is a human fabrication!”

“How can you say such a thing?” asked Wuye, flushing. It was the first time he had ever contradicted Xingxing, and from his stammering reply it was obvious that his view was heartfelt. “How can you say that God is a human fabrication? God exists. Thomas Aquinas proved it. First of all, we know already that everything in the world is in motion and every movement has its cause ad infinitum, then God must be the Prime Mover; second, every event in the world is both cause and effect, then. . then God was the first cause; third, every. . everything in the world is relative, then. . then why make such comparisons, because abso. . absolute truth, goodness, and beauty exist and this. . this is God.