Gao Xingjian - Soul Mountain (chinese)

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"Soul Mountain is one of those singular literary creations that seem impossible to compare with anything but themselves… In the writing of Gao Xingjian literature is born anew from the struggle of the individual to survive the history of the masses."
– from the citation of the Nobel Prize committee of the Swedish Academy
When this year's Nobel Prize for Literature was awarded to Chinese expatriate novelist and playwright Gao Xingjian, few in the English-speaking West were familiar with his work. Gao's masterpiece, SOUL MOUNTAIN (PerfectBound, an e-book from HarperCollins; February 20, 2001; $19.95), is a dazzling kaleidoscope of fiction, philosophy, history and fable. Elegantly translated by Australian sinologist Mabel Lee, this richly textured autobiographical novel recounts a dual journey-a literal journey into the heart of China and a spiritual journey of the self.
When Gao was 43, he was incorrectly diagnosed with lung cancer. Resigned to death by the same means that had claimed his father just a few years before, Gao spent six weeks indulging his appetites and reading philosophy. The spot on Gao's lung mysteriously disappeared, but a new threat arose when rumors began to circulate that he was to be sent to a prison farm because of his controversial writings. No longer facing imminent death, the writer quickly left Beijing and disappeared into the remote forest regions of Sichuan, then spent five months wandering along the Yangtze River from its source down to the coast. Gao's 15,000 kilometer sojourn forms the geographic parameters of the fictional journey in SOUL MOUNTAIN.
While on a train at the start of his trip, the writer protagonist meets another traveler who says he is going to Lingshan, "soul mountain," which can be found by the remote source of the You River. The writer has never heard of such a place, and he resolves to go there, but his fellow traveler can give him none but the vaguest directions. Thus begins a metaphoric odyssey into the hinterlands of China and the outlying Qiang, Miao and Yi districts that dangle on the fringes of Han Chinese civilization.
The writer is in search of the traditions that are hidden in rural China, and as he travels he encounters a parade of unforgettable characters who embody both vestiges of the past-Daoist masters, Buddhist monks, ancient calligraphers-and the modern culture that has surfaced since the revolution: small town communist cadres, budding entrepreneurs, independent young girls grappling with parochial repression. The two worlds exist uneasily as one, with stories and customs from centuries past colliding with a world of televisions, automobiles, and technology. All is permeated by the dark legacy of the Cultural Revolution, the encroachment of ecological damage, and the harsh monetary realities of everyday life in contemporary China.
SOUL MOUNTAIN is a dazzling work of the imagination, where classic fables merge with tales of modern cruelty and ancient philosophy does battle with existentialism. But Gao goes deeper still as he explores notions of the devastation of the self at the hands of social expectations. He continually shifts his narrative voice as the "I" of the writer becomes the "you" of an imagined companion, then the "she" of a woman companion. Yet all reflects back on the protagonist, who craves these two seemingly contradictory ends-the solitude necessary for nurturing the self and the anxiety-provoking warmth of human society.
Gao began this novel in the mid-eighties, then carried the manuscript with him when he fled China in 1987. Now living in Paris, he completed the book there in 1989. His writings continue to be banned in his native country. As Gao's work at last gains the public's attention here in the West, SOUL MOUNTAIN provides a dazzling introduction to the achievement of one of contemporary literature's acknowledged masters.

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  他咧开小嘴,要哭又不敢哭。

  "再哭就打你屁股!

  他好歹忍住了,你抱起他。

  "小家伙,你要上哪里?说话呀!"

  他搂住你脖子,好生自在。

  "你难道不会说话?"

  他满脸泥手抹过的泪痕,就傻望着,弄得你毫无办法。他也许是这附近农家的孩子,父母也不加照看,真够荒唐。

  你抱他走了一程,依然不见房舍,手臂也酸了,总不能抱着这么个哑巴孩子一直走下去,你同他商量。"下来走一段好不好?他摇摇头,一付可怜相。

  你坚持又走了一程,仍不见人家,山谷下也没有炊烟。你疑心会不会是个弃儿?人故意把这哑巴孩子丢弃到山路上?你把他抱回原处,没有人领他父母总还会找来。

  "小东西,下来走几步,手臂都麻了。"

  你拍拍他屁股,竟然睡着了。他扔在这山道上肯定已有好一个时辰,做大人的居然下得了这狠心。你心里开始咒骂他生身的父母,既无力抚养,又何苦生下他来!

  你端详地泪痕斑斑的小脸,睡得很熟,对你就这么信赖,平时恐怕不曾得到过关怀。阳光从云层穿射出来,照在他脸上,他睫毛扇动,身于扭曲了一下,把脸理进你怀里。

  一股温热打你心底涌出,你许久没有过这种柔情。你发现你还是爱孩子的,早该有个儿子。看看看着,越看越觉得像你,你莫不是贪图一时快活,才偶然给他生命?尔后又全然不顾,将他丢弃?甚至不曾再想过他,可诅咒的正是你自己!

  你有点害怕,怕他醒来,怕他会说话,怕他明白过来。幸亏是哑巴,幸亏睡着了,并未醒悟到他的不幸。你得乘他未醒扔回山道上,乘人还未发现,赶紧逃之夭夭。

  你把他放回路上。他滚动了一下,卷曲小腿,双手抱住头脸,肯定感到土地冰凉,马上就会醒来。你撒腿便跑,光天化日之下,像一个逃犯,你似乎听见背后在哭喊,再不敢回头。

七十五

  我路过上海,在火车站排着龙蛇长阵的售票处截到了一张去北京的特快车的退票,一个多小时之后便坐上了火车,十分庆幸。这庞大而拥挤的千万人的都市对我已没有什么意思,我想看的我那位远房伯父比我父亲死得更早,他们都没能活到光荣告老。

  那条穿过市区乌黑的吴淞江成天散发恶臭,鱼鳖都死绝了,真不明白这城市里的人怎么活得下去?连日常饮用的处理过的自来水总是浑黄的且不说,还一股消毒药品氯气味,看来这人比鱼虾更有耐性。

  长江口我以前去过,除了浩荡浑黄的波涛上浮游的不怕生锈的钢铁货轮,就是被浊浪冲刷的长满芦苇的泥岸。水里的泥沙还在沉积,直到有一天把这东海也变成漫无边际的沙洲。

  我记得我小的时候,长江水无论晴天雨天还是清澄。岸边的鱼摊从早起到傍晚都摆着比小孩还长的鱼,斩开分段来卖。我去了沿江许许多多的口岸,别说再也没见到这么大的鱼,连鱼摊都难得碰上。只在三峡出口前的万县,石砌的三四十公尺高的堤岸,见到过几个鱼摊,竹箩筐里全是尺寸长的小毛鱼,早先只作为猫食。那时候,我总爱站在江边的码头上,看人从是船上下铁的滚钓,鱼出水当口,那一番紧张,活脱鱼同人的搏斗。如今光长江规划办公室这么个机构就有上万人在那里规划,他们的一个什么处下的什么科里的接待我的一位科员,等他领导走开,私下里告诉我,这江里上百种淡水鱼已濒临绝迹。

  也就在那万县夜泊时,望着岸上的一片灯光,轮船上的大副同我在甲板上抽烟聊天,说他就躲在那驾驶舱里,目睹了文革武斗时一场大屠杀,杀的当然是人而不是鱼。三个人一串,用铁丝拴住手腕,统统被扫射的机枪赶下江去。只要一个被撩倒,这一串全拖进水里,像鱼上钩一样,劈劈拍拍一阵子挣扎,然后,像一条条死狗随江水漂去。可奇怪的是,人越杀越多,鱼越捕越少,要倒过来呢?该有多好。

  人和鱼倒有一点相同,那就是大鱼和大人弄得都没有了,足见这世界并不为他们而设。

  我这远房的伯父恐怕是大人中最后的一个,我讲的不是大人物,那什么时候都济济满堂,只要有庆典,只要有宴会。我说的大人是我敬仰的人。我敬仰的我这位伯父打错了针药,本来住院只是肺炎,一针下去,只两个小时,便进了太平间。我听说过医院里杀人的事,总不愿相信他死得也这么惨。我就在那大动乱之中,最后一次见他,也是他第一次同我这毛头小伙子,说的是当时,正经谈起文学与政治。这之前,他只哄过我玩。他喉音深沉,能用世界语唱"国际歌",还带点哮端。他年纪不大就有这毛病,说是战争时期烟草的代用品抽多了的缘故。他说战地弄不到烟叶子的时候,烟瘾上来了,什么都能抽,比如把白菜和棉花叶子烘乾了,也能抽上几口,人不论到哪种境地,都想得出办法。

  他也总有办法逗小孩子开心。我大概是同我母亲赌气,绝食对抗,她为我盛上的鸡汤热面我故意凉着就是不吃,那是一场意志的较量。我人小也有人的尊严,弓绷在弦上,正僵持不下,眼看我母亲就要发火,等着我的只能是出丑。我这伯父拉我便走,领我上大街买冰淇淋去了。

  街上刚下过暴雨,水流成河。他了军人的大皮鞋,挽起裤脚,涉水领我进了一家冷饮店,我足足吃了整整两大块雪糕,之后再也没有一次吃过那么多冷食。回到家里,我母亲见他拎着皮鞋那副狼狈样,也就笑了,我同我母亲之间的冷战便宣告结束。他,我这位伯父,才真正具有大人的风度。

  他的父亲,更早已死于吃鸦片玩女人,是个买办资本家。当时给他几千银元,要他去美国留洋,不让他再卷入共产党的地下活动,他却分文不要,偷跑到江西,参加新四军抗战救亡去了。

  他说他在皖南山区新四军军部的时候,从一个农民手里买下了一只豹崽子,偷偷养在他床铺底下的铁丝笼子里,一到夜间这东西野性发作,总吼叫不已。部队开发时,没舍得杀掉,只好送人了。

  他当时谈话的对手是我父亲,他把送他来的汽车司机和随身的警卫员打发走,每次来总从皮包里拿出一瓶市场上买不到的好酒,给我的则是一大包上海的什锦糖果。他们一谈起来便通宵达旦,讲他们童年少年时的往事,同我现今和我少年时的同学偶尔相聚时一样。

  他讲到他们那长满瓦楞草的故居老屋的凄凉,讲到秋风冷雨,他从城外小学堂回来,流了一衣襟的鼻血。小孩子受了惊骇,跑着哭着,那一条长街的熟人和远房的亲戚都站在屋檐下或坐在柜台后面冷眼看着,只有个卖豆腐的老板娘出来一把拦住,拖进她磨房里,用草纸捻子给他堵住鼻血。

  他还讲到他们老家,我那疯子曾祖父放火又被家人抢救下来的老屋,那隔壁一个殉情的女子,前一天还看见她从布店里夹一块花布出来,以为她要做嫁妆,没两天她却穿着这花布做的一身新衣裤吞针自杀了。

  我裹着被子傻听着不肯去睡,见他哮喘,还一根接一根抽烟,说到激动处,就在房里踱步。他说他只想有朝一日辞了官,找个地方去写书。

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