Michael Chabon - The Mysteries Of Pittsburgh

"Come on in."

We stepped into the house, which was full of odors. There was an immediate tart and sweaty smell of marijuana, and then, beneath or woven into that smell, fainter ones of tomato sauce, sex, and old furniture. The place looked grandmotherly and clean: easy chairs, frilly lamps, a beat-up china closet. The girl, her hair black like her brother's, sat on a sofa beside another young woman, who held a toddler on her lap. The little kid didn't look at us-he played with a toy helicopter. On the television, a game-show audience screamed out counsel.

"Who's this guy?" said the tall man, jerking his head at me.

"My dad," said Cleveland. "He doesn't believe I have a steady job."

We all laughed: we men, that is; the two women glared at Cleveland. Then we listened awhile to the television.

"Well," said Cleveland.

"Just give it to him and get them out of here. " It was the woman with the baby; she spoke into the top of the bald little head.

"Why don't you shut up." He reached into the pocket of his jeans, pulled out a black plastic wallet, which looked new, and took from it two crumpled twenties, which he handed to Cleveland. "Not this week," he said.

"No problem," said Cleveland, producing a small manda envelope from his own pocket and poking the bills into it. "No problem at all."

"They say they're going to be hiring back some guys before September, you know, so, like, well." He smiled that awful smile again.

Now the little boy climbed down from the woman's lap and lurched across the living room, stopping when he reached the three of us. He looked up at me, with a crease in his brow, and uttered a few syllables, very seriously.

"Yes, I know," I said.

After the door had closed behind us and we came down the shattered walk, I asked Cleveland what he found so remarkable about the household.

"They're both his sisters," he said.

There was a short silence while I digested this.

"Whose…?"

"I don't know. Maybe it's not even his. You should see them on a good day, though. Today they were all stoned. On a good day, that place is like a circus."

This made me angry.

" Cleveland. You- This is horrible. You're taking advantage of this unemployed guy, you walk into their house once a week and you ruin their day, I'll bet they have huge nghts after you leave, and you think the whole thing is funny. You get a kick out of it. Those people hate your guts. They hate you. How can you stand to look at that guy's shit-eating grin every week?"

"The world of business is built on shit-eating grins. "

"You can cut the fake cynicism, Cleveland."

"You're the economist. You know what economics is."

"I don't remember."

"You remember. It's the precise measurement of shit eating, it's the science of misery. Look, I have to think it's funny, don't I? Okay."

He stopped. We were halfway along the row of houses, and the sun had just come out, making it hotter than before. He bent down to pull the fabric of his jeans away from the backs of his knees, and I realized how stuck together I felt, too, and bent down alongside him.

"Okay. Look. I brought you along, Bechstein. I've never brought anyone before. No one else except Artie even knows that I do this. Jane doesn't know. And I would never have brought Lecomte. Why? I don't know. I'm not supposed to bring anybody at all. But for some reason I wanted you to see this. You should understand this. Can't you see why I do this?" He was almost shouting, seemingly angrier than I had been a moment before. Drops of sweat had pooled over his eyebrows and poured down the sides of his face. But I didn't believe him. I felt all at once like Arthur with his X-ray heart, and I was sure that Cleveland was misleading me somehow, that he did know why I was standing on that hill with him, soaking wet, ashamed, and in a sudden rage.

"Because it's easy," I shouted. "Because it's easy, and it pays well, and it makes you feel like you're better than the people you exploit."

I thought he was going to punch me. He made fists and kept them, barely, at his sides. Then the anger went out of his shoulders; he unbailed his hands and smiled, faintly.

"Wrong. No. Wrong. I do it because it is fun and fascinating work."

"Ah."

"See, I'm a people person." He gave an airy toss of his great head.

"I see."

"And also-I'm surprised that you haven't guessed this, Bechstein-I do it because-"

"I know," I said. "Because it is Bad."

He grinned and said, "I wear a rattlesnake for a necktie."

I laughed.

"I have a mojo hand," he said.

It was very difficult for me to admit it to myself, almost as difficult as it would have been to express admiration for my father's job and associates (and still I took his money), but collecting illegal interest on loans, although perhaps not fun, was terribly fascinating work. I had always felt pleasure on looking into the houses of strangers. As a child, coming home at sunset through the infinite chain of backyards that led from the schoolyard to our house, I would catch glimpses in windows of dining rooms, tables set for supper; of crayon drawings tacked to refrigerators, cartons of milk standing on counters; of feet on low hassocks, framed photographs, and empty sofas, all lit by the bland light of the television; and these quickly shifting tableaux, of strange furniture and the lives and families they divulged, would send me into a trance of curiosity. For a long time I thought that one became a spy in order to watch the houses of other people, to be confronted by the simple, wondrous fact of other kitchens, other clocks, and ottomans.

Cleveland took me to ten or twelve houses on that hill, and I stood in kitchens, on patios, wanting so little to watch the smarminess and resentment passed along with each ten-dollar bill that I noted every thing in each room, feverishly-the silk flowers on the televisions, the statues of Our Lady, the babies' stockings on the floors. At first I pretended that Cleveland was conducting me along the galleries of a Museum of Real Life, a series of careful, clever re-creations of houses, in which one could almost but not quite imagine plain and awful things happening, as though the houses were uninhabited, fake, and for my amusement; but by the seventh or eighth house, with its blue-veined pair of legs, filthy child, pretty sister, spoiled lunch hour, I was out of the museum. His "people" had me in their spell. They did not like him, nor did he care very much for them; but there was a basic, hard, genuine acquaintance, an odd kind of comfort between them and him, and I felt as though I were being shown, in this world that seemed somehow better than mine, yet another way in which I would never come to know Cleveland.

" Cleveland," said one older woman, whose husband had borrowed one hundred and fifty dollars at an endlessly compounding rate of interest long enough ago that she now thought of Cleveland in the same way she thought of the mailman, "you look more like Russell every day. It makes me want to cry." She'd been treating her hair when we arrived and now wore a see-through plastic babushka that crinkled when she shook her head. The whole place smelled of bad eggs.

"Why is that?"

"Do you know where Russell is right this minute?"

"At the mill?"

"Nope, he's in the bedroom sleeping off a hangover. And you've got that same swoll-up face that he does. You got a girl?"

"Yeah." I was surprised to see that he put his fingers to his cheeks and pressed them tentatively.

"Well, I feel sorry for her. You get uglier every week."

As we crossed the cracked flagstones on the lawn of the last house, he stopped short, stood rigid. I bumped into him from behind, hard enough to knock his glasses off.

"What's the matter?" I said.