Jenny Downham - You Against Me

He tucked in his knees and jumped like she had. He yelled, all arms and legs, and a splash so big she had to turn her face away. When she looked back he’d disappeared beneath the water. She watched the bubbles and waited.

He came up gasping for air. ‘God, it’s cold.’ He looked as if he was crying as water clung to his eyelashes and dripped down his cheeks.

‘Feels good though, eh?’

‘It’s freezing!’

She swam to him, smiling. ‘Can’t you handle it?’

He splashed her. She splashed him back. He tried to dunk her, but he didn’t know she was fast and could get away from him easily. She let him almost catch her, then sank beneath the surface, came up behind him and dunked him first. She swam away laughing. She floated on her back and looked at the sky. She hoped she looked thin and in control. The way her lungs stretched and accommodated made her feel like an athlete.

She grabbed hold of a low branch and watched him swim up to her. He grabbed hold of it too and they hung there together. When they didn’t move, the river lay smooth, the water cloudy and dark.

‘What happens if you drink it?’ he said.

‘You die.’

He looked startled. ‘Serious?’

She grinned. ‘No, it’s Grade B, which is pretty clean. About three miles further along it spreads out into creeks and goes through the salt marshes. You wouldn’t want to swim in it there.’

‘Why not?’

‘It’s tidal by then, so you never know what the depth is. There’s loads of sinking mud too.’

‘I like how you know things,’ he said, and he looked right at her.

‘You do?’

‘I like a lot about you, in fact.’

It sounded like such a line, she laughed.

‘Your lips are blue,’ he said.

He reached across and touched her mouth with his finger as if he could brush the cold away. And it was astonishing the things her body did in response – her heart racing, the crazy adrenalin rush. She wanted to kiss his finger. Or lick it. She wanted him to put it in her mouth.

‘You don’t exactly look warm yourself,’ she whispered.

‘Maybe we should get out then.’

But neither of them moved.

He leaned towards her. His eyes were brown flecked with dark gold. He kissed her very gently. His hand touched her cheek as if she was infinitely precious.

After a while, he pulled back and said, ‘I really think we should get out. You’re shivering like mad.’

She buried her nose and mouth in the curve of his neck and kissed him once there to say goodbye. Then the two of them clambered up the side of the riverbank and raced to the spot where they’d left their clothes.

She grabbed her tights to use as a towel; he did the same with his T-shirt. They hopped about, teeth chattering, rubbing themselves dry.

‘Run,’ he said. ‘Come on, we need to get warm.’

He grabbed her hand and pulled her along the grass. At the trees she wheeled him round and made them skip back. They took it in turns with instructions. Up and down the riverbank – jumping one way, hopping back, pogo-ing, aeroplane impressions (wings, plus engine sounds), before sinking ragged and laughing onto the grass.

‘That,’ he said, ‘has only just begun to warm me up. I swear I’ve never been so cold in my life.’

‘You should try the sea next,’ she laughed. ‘And I don’t mean the sea anywhere tame, I mean the wild sea. My gran’s got this cottage over by the bay and there’s a great beach there. It’s got amazing waves, really ferocious. I’ll take you one day if you like.’

‘Promise?’

‘Course.’

And they both smiled, like they knew something, and his hand reached hers and clasped it tight, like being chosen and taken care of.

And that’s when his phone rang again.

Don’t answer it, she thought. Stay here with me . But he let go of her hand, leaned over for his jacket and fumbled in the pocket for his phone. When he saw who it was he stood up and walked a few steps down the slope.

‘Again?’ he said. It was a different voice from the one he’d used earlier. It had an edge of fear to it. ‘What did you open it for? I told you not to. Why would you do that?’

He flicked Ellie a look.

‘Is it your sister?’ she mouthed.

He nodded, took a couple more steps down the slope. ‘All right, calm down, they’ve gone now. No, I’m not telling you off. Listen, Holly, this is what I’m going to do. I’m going to come and see you, OK? I’ll get Jacko to give me a lift and I’ll be with you in twenty minutes. No, babe, I can’t stay, I’ve got to go to work, but I’ll bring you a treat. What would you like me to bring?’

Ellie pulled her clothes towards her. She managed to unbutton her wet shirt and swap it for her cardigan and coat without him seeing as he said goodbye to his sister. He immediately made another call and arranged to meet his friend at the cemetery gate in ten minutes.

That was it then. Day over. She’d known it was too good to last.

He slid his phone shut and walked back up the slope. ‘Sorry,’ he said.

‘That sounded difficult.’

‘My sister’s upset. She’s only eight and some people knocked on the door and she opened it and scared herself.’

‘Wasn’t your mum there?’

‘She had to pop out.’

‘Who were the people?’

‘Um, no one, just random people. Anyway, I have to go.’

Ellie scrambled quickly into her skirt as if she’d been thinking the very same thing. Across the grass, he pulled on his jeans and socks and trainers. The moment when they’d kissed felt like a lifetime ago.

‘Where do you work?’ she said.

‘In a pub. It’s not in town, so you wouldn’t know it. It’s one of the touristy places down by the harbour.’

She kept quiet, hoping he’d invite her for lunch after he’d sorted his sister out. She could sit at the bar and chat to him, order a sandwich. She’d like that. But he didn’t ask. In fact, he didn’t say anything and his whole face closed down as if he never would again.

They walked back in silence. Her shoes were too big without her tights and slapped loudly on the path. Her wet underwear felt clammy and rubbed the inside of her thighs and under her arms. She trailed her wet shirt and tights from one hand, letting them scrape the ground, letting them gather dust and leaves and twigs. She didn’t care. She wanted to collect stuff – secret smells and things from the path. She’d examine them when she got home and maybe what happened in the water might seem real.

But where the path came to the slope, and where the slope led them back to the graveyard and the bench, he stalled. He turned to her very seriously.

‘I like you,’ he said.

He made it sound as if she was bound to disagree with him. She nodded. His face said he was telling her something very important.

He said, ‘I mean it. Whatever happens, you have to believe that.’

‘That sounds a bit dramatic.’

He looked at his mobile again. ‘I’ve gotta go.’

They walked together through the graveyard and out through the wooden gate. It was still way too early for school to finish and there was no one around. He seemed nervous standing out on the street. Didn’t he want to be seen with her in public? Maybe she was too ugly. Or maybe he did have a girlfriend and what happened on the phone wasn’t anything to do with his sister.

‘Well, I’ll say goodbye here then,’ he said.

She needed to get back to the main road too, so even though he obviously didn’t want to, they walked together towards the junction. He walked slightly in front of her, head down, hands in pockets.

When the car pulled up, he didn’t even notice.

‘That bloke in the car’s waving,’ she told him. ‘Is that your friend?’