Roald Dahl - The Collected Short Stories of Roald Dahl, Volume 2

"No," she answered timidly. "Of course not."

"Then become the composer! Steal his music! Take it away from him and give it to yourself!" He leaned back in his chair and for the first time she saw him smile. He had only just thought of this new complex explanation of his conduct, but to him it seemed a very good one and he smiled. "Well, what do you think, Miss Darlington?"

"I must say it's very very interesting." She was polite and puzzled but she was a long way away from him now.

"Would you like to try?"

"Oh no. Please."

"I wish you would."

"I'm afraid I don't think I should be able to feel the same way as you do about it, Mr Botibol. I don't think I have a strong enough imagination."

She could see from his eyes he was disappointed. "But I'd love to sit in the audience and listen while you do it," she added.

Then he leapt up from his chair. "I've got it!" he cried. "A piano concerto! You play the piano, I conduct. You the greatest pianist, the greatest in the world. First performance of my Piano Concerto No .1. You playing, me conducting. The greatest pianist and the greatest composer together for the first time. A tremendous occasion! The audience will go mad! There'll be queueing all night outside the hall to get in. It'll be broadcast around the world. It'll, it'll… " Mr Botibol stopped. He stood behind the chair with both hands resting on the back of the chair and suddenly he looked embarrassed and a trifle sheepish. "I'm sorry," he said, "I get worked up. You see how it is. Even the thought of another performance gets me worked up." And then plaintively, "Would you, Miss Darlington , would you play a piano concerto with me?"

"It's like children," she said, but she smiled.

"No one will know. No one but us will know anything about it."

"All right," she said at last. "I'll do it. I think I'm daft but just the same I'll do it. It'll be a bit of a lark."

"Good!" Mr Botibol cried. "When? Tonight?"

"Oh well, I don't..

"Yes," he said eagerly. "Please. Make it tonight. Come back and have dinner here with me and we'll give the concert afterwards." Mr Botibol was excited again now. "We must make a few plans. Which is your favourite piano concerto, Miss Darlington?"

"Oh well, I should say Beethoven's Emperor."

"The Emperor it shall be. You will play it tonight. Come to dinner at seven. Evening dress. You must have evening dress for the concert."

"I've got a dancing dress but I haven't worn it for years."

"You shall wear it tonight." He paused and looked at her in silence for a moment, then quite gently, he said, "You're not worried, Miss Darlington? Perhaps you would rather not do it. I'm afraid, I'm afraid I've let myself get rather carried away. I seem to have pushed you into this. And I know how stupid it must seem to you." That's better, she thought. That's much better. Now I know it's all right. "Oh no," she said. "I'm really looking forward to it. But you frightened me a bit, taking it all so seriously."

When she had gone, he waited for five minutes, then went out into the town to the gramophone shop and bought the records of the Emperor Concerto, conductor, Toscanini—soloist, Horowitz. He returned at once, told his astonished butler that there would be a guest for dinner, then went upstairs and changed into his tails.

She arrived at seven. She was wearing a long sleeveless dress made of some shiny green material and to Mr Botibol she did not look quite so plump or quite so plain as before. He took her straight in to dinner and in spite of the silent disapproving manner in which Mason prowled around the table, the meal went well. She protested gaily when Mr Botibol gave her a second glass of wine, but she didn't refuse it. She chattered away almost without a stop throughout the three courses and Mr Botibol listened and nodded and kept refilling her glass as soon as it was half empty.

Afterwards, when they were seated in the living-room, Mr Botibol said, "Now Miss Darlington, now we begin to fall into our parts." The wine, as usual, had made him happy, and the girl, who was even less used to it than the man, was not feeling so bad either. "You, Miss Darlington, are the great pianist. What is your first name, Miss Darlington?"

"Lucille," she said. "The great pianist Lucille Darlington. I am the composer Botibol. We must talk and act and think as though we are pianist and composer."

"What is your first name, Mr Botibol? What does the A stand for?"

"Angel," he answered.

"Not Angel."

"Yes," he said irritably.

"Angel Botibol," she murmured and she began to giggle. But she checked herself and said, "I think it's a most unusual and distinguished name."

"Are you ready, Miss Darlington?"

"Yes."

Mr Botibol stood up and began pacing nervously up and down the room. He looked at his watch. "It's nearly time to go on," he said. "They tell me the place is packed. Not an empty seat anywhere. I always get nervous before a concert. Do you get nervous, Miss Darlington?"

"Oh yes, I do, always. Especially playing with you."

"I think they'll like it. I put everything I've got into this concerto, Miss Darlington. It nearly killed me composing it. I was ill for weeks afterwards."

"Poor you," she said.

"It's time now," he said. "The orchestra are all in their places. Come on." He led her out and down the passage, then he made her wait outside the door of the concert-hall while he nipped in, arranged the lighting and switched on the gramophone. He came back and fetched her and as they walked on to the stage, the applause broke out. They both stood and bowed towards the darkened auditorium and the applause was vigorous and it went on for a long time. Then Mr Botibol mounted the dais and Miss Darlington took her seat at the piano. The applause died down. Mr Botibol held up his baton. The next record dropped and the Emperor Concerto began.

It was an astonishing affair. The thin stalk-like Mr Botibol, who had no shoulders, standing on the dais in his evening clothes waving his arms about in approximate time to the music; and the plump Miss Darlington in her shiny green dress seated at the keyboard of the enormous piano thumping the silent keys with both hands for all she was worth. She recognized the passages where the piano was meant to be silent, and on these occasions she folded her hands primly on her lap and stared straight ahead with a dreamy and enraptured expression on her face. Watching her, Mr Botibol thought that she was particularly wonderful in the slow solo passages of the Second Movement. She allowed her hands to drift smoothly and gently up and down the keys and she inclined her head first to one side, then to the other, and once she closed her eyes for a long time while she played. During the exciting last movement, Mr Botibol himself lost his balance and would have fallen off the platform had he not saved himself by clutching the brass rail. But in spite of everything, the concerto moved on majestically to its mighty conclusion. Then the real clapping came. Mr Botibol walked over and took Miss Darlington by the hand and led her to the edge of the platform, and there they stood, the two of them, bowing, and bowing, and bowing again as the clapping and the shouting of 'encore' continued. Four times they left the stage and came back, and then, the fifth time, Mr Botibol whispered, "It's you they want. You take this one alone."

"No," she said. "It's you. Please." But he pushed her forward and she took her call, and came back and said, "Now you. They want you. Can't you hear them shouting for you?" So Mr Botibol walked alone on to the stage, bowed gravely to right, left and centre and came off just as the clapping stopped altogether.

He led her straight back to the living-room. He was breathing fast and the sweat was pouring down all over his face. She too was a little breathless, and her cheeks were shining red.