A. Yehoshua - A Late Divorce

— I swear I don’t know. I’m attracted to your whole family by now. I was very pleased that you took me to see your mother in the hospital. It touched me that you weren’t ashamed to let me see her or the two of you together. Your whole story… you know, your father intrigues me too… what’s happening to me? Have I fallen in love with you? Can that be? Tell me, you know better than I do. I know I’m not your first… maybe you even have a few other Refa’el Calderons in a few other banks… can that be? You’re killing me. What do you want from me? Is it just the money? Tell me. You can’t just say nothing now. And don’t smile…

— No. Inside you. I feel that you’re laughing at me all the time there.

— It’s crazy for me to be talking like this. And it’s almost morning.

— Right.

— But how did you spot me? Flow did you know? You only saw me once or twice in the bank, and you already knew that I had it in me. And then when we went out for lunch you put your hand on my pants with such assurance. How did you know? I’ve already asked you that, but you’ve never really given me an answer.

— No, no, I won’t bring that up again.

— Yes. I beg your pardon. I’ve gone too far.

— Fine.

— All right. All right.

— I won’t say another word.

— No.

— Right.

— Maybe.

— No.

— Yes. You see, what I’ve told you about the bank verges on a criminal offense. If they found out about it they’d bust me right away to some small branch — and they’d be right. Bleicher is always warning us about leaks… what counts most in all these transactions is the element of surprise… because as soon as the word gets out, you’ve lost your whole edge. That’s why he’s lucky to be surrounded by us Sephardim. He knows we can be trusted to keep our mouths shut.

— No. No, I’m not prejudiced… wait a minute… you misunderstood me…

— No. He said that himself. That… that…

— No. But it’s an attitude. He’s right. If he knew that I had relations with you… that I could be blackmailed…

— No, try to understand…

— No, please try to understand…

— No. I didn’t mean that. Forgive me.

— No. Forgive me, my dearest… my darling…

— You keep telling me that and I hear every word and I believe you. I want to believe you. But you have to understand. Even if I don’t say anything, I’m watching you just like my wife is.

— One minute… one minute… listen to me, my dear… it’s not as though you had a real job…

— No… one minute… oh God… what really is that investment company of yours? It’s nothing. I’ve looked into it…

— One minute… I’m begging you to listen to me. I’m falling off my feet. Go ahead and reassure me if you can. Go right ahead…

— That doesn’t matter. But you have no capital. And who is this Gilat character that you work for? A bank joke. A man who juggles a few stocks here and there to create an optical illusion. Not that I mind, but…

— Hold on a minute. Listen to me.

— I know all that. I know. But believe me, I’m a specialist in these things. I know all about them. And I’ve seen more than one of these little investment companies come and go like flies. There’s no future in them.

— I didn’t say criminal. I said no future, which comes close to criminality. Not that it’s any of my business. It’s just that I keep asking myself… it worries me sick that maybe you took up with me… that it’s all… because otherwise why should you… with an old, worn-out man like me… I even have wrinkles…

— No… just a minute… but maybe you’re trying to milk me for…

— Inside information. Hold on. Just tell me. I don’t care. I never said I wouldn’t give it to you. Just tell me if that’s what you’re after. I don’t care. I’ll tell you everything, whatever you ask for…

— No. I beg your pardon. Just a minute…

— Yes, shhh… excuse me, I’ll lower my voice… but what do you need all that for? I can get you a good job in one of our branches. You wouldn’t start with a high salary, but you’d be well placed and I’d see to it that you were promoted. I’d take terrific care of you from high up. Stick with me and I’ll look after you like my own son… because that’s how I feel about you… as though you were… you’re the right age, after all… but there I go again…

— Yes. I’m going right away.

— No. I’m going. I’ve already ruined your night. My dearest… my love… my desire… oh God, look how I’m ranting at the mouth. I don’t know what’s happening to me, running around like this in the middle of the night — me, who used to be in bed at nine-thirty, after the evening news, and in my pajamas by eight. I can’t go on like this. I beg your pardon, I swore I’d never cry in front of you and here I am doing it again… I’m on the verge of tears all the time… Hold it, don’t move!

— Don’t move! He’s really there.

— I just saw him!

— The mouse ha ha ha.

— Yes. He ran behind you, by the stove. I swear he stopped to look at us. You were right.

— Hold it, don’t move! Don’t frighten him. By God, he’s a big one. Maybe it’s a rat. Or a very old mouse. He was looking at me…

— He’s in the stove, or behind it, ha ha ha.

— Why do I find it so funny…?

— You thought he was in the closet. But they like stoves.

— I guess the heat doesn’t bother them.

— You need a trap and a piece of cheese.

— Leave it to me.

— Me too. But it’s the killing that I mind, not the catching. I’ll come to spend a night here and catch him for you. It’s a real mouse ha ha…

— A really big one. I don’t know why it makes me laugh. Ha ha ha ha. A mouse…

— Yes, shhh… I’ll be going now. What would you say before that though to a little… it would suit my desperate mood splendidly… I could really go for it now… we’ll make it quick and quiet…

— Your father? Yes… but…

— I understand.

— Quietly… it would just take a minute or two…

— I understand. But suppose we closed the door. He’s fast asleep.

— No. I understand. All right.

— I could do it by myself. If you’d just let me do it by myself… you can even fall asleep beside me. All I need is your hand…

— It won’t take me long. I’ll be quiet. I need it so badly now… What?

— You just have to let me lie next to you. I only need to see you… even in your pajamas… you needn’t undress… you won’t even feel me… I’ll be like a bird. This whole night has given me the most awful passion… I have it so bad… I feel all shook up by it. What a terrible age to be! It’s like you’re feeling the beginning of the end. There’s an impatience with things… I can understand your father so well. And it’s not just physical. It’s an actual psychological need… what do you say?

— I don’t want to pressure you.

— Never mind. You’re killing me. You’ll kill me in the end, but never mind. In the end I’ll come down with some terrible illness… I can feel it in my bones… or else I’ll end up like your mother…

— All right. All right. You’ve been putting me off for a week now. And afterwards you’ll be tied up with your father.

— I’ll live. I just thought…

— It’s been at her brother’s house for the last thirty years. The whole family gets together. I’m petrified that they’ll guess right away that something is wrong. I can see already that it’s going to be a very hard seder for me. And I’ll have to sing too. It gets longer and longer every year, because her brother keeps getting more religious. Well, never mind…