Mo Yan - Frog

QIN HE:Comrades, friends, did you hear that? Hao Dashou, you’re not shameless, you’re too thickheaded to even feel shame, you’re deranged, you’re obsessive-compulsive. After a lifetime of making clay dolls, there isn’t one that can be called finished. You make one, then destroy it. The next one will be the one, you tell yourself. You’re like the bear in the cornfield picking ears and discarding them. Comrades, friends, take a good look at those hands. Hao Dashou, Big-Hands Hao? Those aren’t hands, they’re frog claws, duck’s feet, webbing and all…

HAO DASHOU:( angrily throws a lump of clay at Qin He ) You’re full of shit, you’re deranged. Get the hell out of here!

QIN HE:Make me!

HAO DASHOU:This is my house.

QIN HE:Can you prove that? ( points to Gugu and the hanging children ) Can she? Can they?

HAO DASHOU:( points to Gugu ) Of course she can.

QIN HE:Prove it.

HAO DASHOU:She’s my wife.

QIN HE:Prove it.

HAO DASHOU:We’re married.

QIN HE:Got any proof?

HAO DASHOU:We’ve slept together.

QIN HE:( deeply hurt, holds his head ) No — you’re a liar, you’re lying to me. I gave up my youth for you, you promised you wouldn’t marry anyone, not ever!

GUGU:( looks daggers at Hao ) Why are you provoking him? We agreed.

HAO DASHOU:I forgot.

GUGU:You forgot? Let me remind you. I told you back then that I’d marry you, but only if you accepted him as my kid brother, and that you’d put up with his outbursts, his foolishness, his crazy talk; and that you’d supply his room, board and clothing.

HAO DASHOU:And let him sleep with you?

GUGU:Deranged, you’re both deranged.

QIN HE:( points angrily at Hao ) He’s deranged, not me.

HAO DASHOU:Make as much noise as you want, be as angry from embarrassment as you want, it won’t make any difference. You can raise your fists above the trees, cherries can spray from your eyes, you can grow horns, birds can fly out of your mouth, you can grow pig’s bristles all over your body, and none of those will alter the fact that you’re deranged. That is etched in stone.

GUGU:( mocking ) Is that language you learned from Tadpole’s little drama?

HAO DASHOU:( points to Qin He ) Every two months you have to check in to the Ma’er Shan Asylum for a three-month stay. They put you in a straitjacket and a sedative regimen; if that doesn’t work, they use electric shock therapy. When they finish with you, you’re skin and bones and glassy-eyed, like an African orphan. Your face is covered with flyspecks, like an old wall. You finally escape, but are never out more than two months. Tomorrow or the day after, you have to go back there again. ( deftly imitates the sound of an ambulance siren. Qin He trembles and falls to his knees ) When you go in this time, you’ll not come out again. If they let you out with your manic condition, you would introduce an element of disharmony into harmonious society.

GUGU:That’s enough!

HAO DASHOU:If I were a doctor, I’d lock you up for good and use a cow prod till you foamed at the mouth, till your body was racked by spasms, and you went into such deep shock you’d never come out of it. But if somehow you did, you’d have no memory.

Qin He wraps his arms around his head as he rolls on the ground and releases horrifying shrieks .

HAO DASHOU:Braying like a donkey and rolling on the ground are paltry skills. Go on, keep rolling. Look, your face is getting longer. Your ears are getting bigger. Feel them yourself. You’re becoming a donkey. A donkey turns a millstone, round and round and round. ( Qin He crawls on the floor, his rump raised, as he mimics a donkey turning a millstone ) Right, that’s it, you’re a fine donkey. After you mill two pecks of black beans, mill a bushel of sorghum. A good donkey doesn’t need blinders, because a good donkey doesn’t nibble at the grain on the millstone. Do a good job and your master will treat you well. I’ve got your feed already prepared, just waiting for you.

Gugu goes up to stop Qin He, but he bites her hand.

GUGU:Damn you, you don’t know what’s good for you!

HAO DASHOU:I’ve told you you’ve got no business here. You go take care of the children. Make sure they’re not cold or hungry. But don’t let them eat too much either or get too warm. Like you’ve always said: Children are best comforted by keeping them slightly hungry and a little cold. ( turns to Qin He ) Why have you stopped? You lazy donkey, do I have to use a whip on you?

GUGU:Stop abusing him, he’s not well.

HAO DASHOU: He’s not well, I think you’re not well!

Qin He collapses on the stage, foaming at the mouth.

HAO DASHOU:Get up, you can stop playing dead. This isn’t the first time you’ve played that game. I’ve seen it many, many times. If you think you can scare me with that, you’re mistaken. Even a stinkbug knows how to play dead. What you need to do is really die. Do it now, don’t wait another minute.

Gugu rushes up to help Qin He. Hao Dashou gets up and stops her.

HAO DASHOU:( painfully ) My patience has run out. I’m not going to let you save him like that…

Gugu moves left, Hao follows; Gugu moves right, Hao follows.

GUGU:He’s not well. In the minds of us doctors there are two types of people, healthy and sick. If he’d hit my mother yesterday and was struck by illness today, I’d put aside my hatred and treat him to the best of my ability. If his brother had an epileptic seizure while he was raping me I’d push him off and try to save him.

HAO DASHOU:( abruptly stiffens and lowers his voice to say painfully ) You finally admit that you had illicit relations with the two brothers.

GUGU:History is like that, the history of thousands of years of civilised society. Those who acknowledge history are history’s materialists. Those who deny it are history’s idealists.

Gugu sits beside Qin He and wraps him in her arms like a baby. She rocks him and sings an indistinguishable song.

GUGU:My heart breaks when I think of you… I cry but without tears when I think of you… I want to write but cannot find your address… I want to sing but cannot recall the words… I want to kiss you but cannot find your lips… I want to hold you but cannot find your body…

A child in a green stomacher embroidered with a frog, his head as clean as watermelon rind, emerges from the dark cave entrance at the head of an army of frogs (played by children) in wheelchairs, on canes, their front legs wrapped in gauze. The boy shouts Collecting debts! Collecting debts! The frogs behind him produce a guttural chorus.

Gugu lets out a shrill scream, runs away from Qin He and dodges the child and the frogs.

Hao Dashou and the suddenly alert Qin He block the attack of the green boy and frogs; Gugu leaves the stage in their protection. The green boy and frogs take up the chase offstage.

Curtain

A police station waiting room. One table only, with a telephone. Certificates of merit and citations adorn the wall.