Yu Hua - Brothers

The entire morning, Li Lans face was red with emotion. Along the street in front of her there was a sea of red flags and a din of slogans and chants. The parading crowds seemed interminable, heating up the already scorching summer day. The front-gate guard now recognized Li Lan and spent all the morning curiously observing this woman who had frightened him into wetting his pants. He saw that she sought out each member of the parading crowds — which is to say, every person who walked by — with a look of great anticipation. Li Lans excitement was like a little stream flowing into the river, her eyes anxiously searching for Song Fanping amid the crowds. The guard watched her as she stood there for a long, long time, examining the crowds and wondering why no one had come to pick her up yet. So he walked over to her and asked, "When is your husband coming?"

Li Lan turned to answer. "At noon."

When the guard heard this, he returned to his post in disbelief. Glancing up at the clock on his wall, he saw that it was not yet 10 A.M. He thought to himself, There really are all sorts of people in this world! This woman's been standing here waiting since before dawn for a man who is supposed to arrive at noon. The guard regarded Li Lan again curiously, thinking, So, how long has this woman gone without a man? He couldn't resist going up to her and asking, "How long have you been parted from your husband?" Li Lan told him that it had been more than two months. The guard chuckled to himself: So just two months and she's champing at the bit like this. She might look all frail and shriveled, but obviously in her bones she is quite the wanton hussy.

By this time Li Lan had been waiting there for more than six hours. She had not had a drop to drink nor a bite to eat, but her face was still beaming with emotion. As noon approached, her excitement reached a fever pitch, her gaze like a nail piercing the bodies of each of the men walking by. Several times when she saw someone with a figure similar to Song Fanpings, she stood on her toes and waved as her eyes filled with tears. Though the joy was always short-lived, she remained undaunted.

Noon came and went, and Song Fanping never appeared. But Song Fanpings sister hurried over. Drenched in sweat, she emerged from a crowded bus and rushed to the hospitals front gate. When she spotted Li Lan, she excitedly shouted, "Aiya, you're still here."

Song Fanpings sister mopped her brow and prattled on. She said that all the way there she had been so worried she wouldn't make it in time that she had almost taken a bus directly to the depot, but it was a good thing she hadn't. As she spoke she handed Li Lan a bag of White Rabbit milk candies, saying that they were for the kids. Li Lan took the candy and placed it in her bag. She didn't say a single word, only smiled and nodded, all the while glancing out at the streams of people. Song Fanpings sister started watching the men on the street along with her but felt perplexed by her brother's absence and, pointing at her watch, said, "He should be here, it's almost one P.M."

The two women stood at the front gate of the hospital for about half an hour. Song Fanpings sister said that she couldn't wait any longer and had to rush back to work. Before leaving, she comforted Li Lan, speculating that Song Fanping must have gotten stuck in traffic. She noted that it took three transfers from the bus depot to the hospital, and since the streets were filled with demonstrators, traffic was a mess. As a result, it was hard for a person to squeeze through, let alone an entire bus. Song Fanpings sister hurried away but immediately rushed back to tell Li Lan, "If you don't make the afternoon bus, just come stay at my place."

Li Lan continued waiting at the hospital gate. She believed what Song Fanpings sister said, that Song Fanping was probably stuck in traffic, and she continued to watch the men on the street with passion and anticipation. She became increasingly fatigued. Faint with hunger, she sat down on the steps of the guardroom, her body leaning against the door frame; but her head was still held high, and her eyes were still watching intently. The old man in the guardroom glanced at the clock on the wall and said, "You've been here since before dawn, and now its already past two. I haven't seen you eat or drink anything all day. Won't you go get yourself something?"

Li Lan smiled. "I'm fine."

The old man continued, "Go buy something to eat. There's a snack shop about twenty yards from here, just down to the right."

Li Lan shook her head. "What if he comes while I'm gone?"

The old man said, "I'll keep an eye out for him. Tell me, what does he look like?"

Li Lan thought for a bit, then shook her head. "I'd better stay here and wait for him myself."

The two of them fell silent. The old man returned to his post, where there was always someone at the window asking about something or other. Li Lan continued to sit on the steps, watching everyone who passed by. Finally, the old man got up and walked over to Li Lan, saying, "Let me get you something to eat."

Li Lan started. The old man repeated himself and extended Li Lan his hand. She now understood and hurriedly reached into her pockets for money and grain coupons. The old man asked her, "What would you like? Steamed buns? With meat or bean filling? How about a bowl of wonton soup?"

Li Lan handed over her money and grain coupons. "Two plain buns would be fine."

The old man took the money. "You're so frugal."

He walked away from the gate, then turned around. "Don't let anyone into the guardroom. Everything inside belongs to the nation."

Li Lan nodded. "I know."

At about half past three in the afternoon, Li Lan finally had something to eat. She slowly ripped off chunk after chunk of bun and placed them in her mouth, methodically chewing and swallowing. She hadn't had any water all day, so eating was difficult, like gulping down bitter medicine. When the old man saw this, he handed her his teacup. Li Lan raised the tea-stained cup and slowly sipped from it. She finished one bun, then wrapped up the other one and placed it in her travel bag. After having the bun, Li Lan felt herself regaining some of her strength. She stood up and said to the old man in the guardroom, "The bus he was taking would have arrived in Shanghai by eleven A.M. Even if he were walking, he should have been here by now."

The old man agreed. "Even if he were crawling, he still should have gotten here by now."

Li Lan surmised that Song Fanping must have taken the afternoon bus. She wondered if some important matter had delayed him. She felt that she should go to the bus depot herself, since the afternoon bus got into Shanghai at 5 P.M. Li Lan gave the old man a careful description of Song Fanping, adding that if Song did arrive, to please tell him that she had gone to the bus depot. The old man told her not to worry, that he would ask every tall man who came by whether he was Song Fanping.

Li Lan took up her travel bag and walked out the hospital gate. She stood for a while at the bus stop, but then returned to the guard window. When the old man saw her, he asked, "How come you're back?"

Li Lan replied, "I forgot to mention something."

The old man asked, "What?"

Li Lan looked into his eyes and said solemnly, "Thank you, you are a good man."

Small and frail, Li Lan carried her heavy travel bag and squeezed onto the bus. She swayed along with the crowd inside and was dizzied by the foul stench of armpits and feet and mouths. Then she squeezed off the bus, only to squeeze onto another one, finally arriving at the depot after three bus transfers. By then it was almost five. She stood at the stations exit, rays of sunset bathing her in a reddish glow as she watched bus after bus pull into the station and group after group of travelers emerge from the platform. Her face was once again red with excitement and her spirits were high, because she knew that when one of the passengers emerged a head taller than the rest, that man would be Song Fanping. So she set her gaze at the tops of the travelers’ heads, still firmly believing that Song Fanping would walk out through the exit. The very possibility of an accident had not even crossed her mind.