David Vann - Last Day on Earth - A Portrait of the NIU School Shooter

Steve’s feelings about religion come from his hatred of his mother, but it’s interesting to note that you can be ultra — right wing and antireligious. The religious right isn’t the only right. In fact, the ultra right is about the primacy of the individual, and so in its purest forms, it can’t embrace religion, which is essentially against the individual. If religion weren’t corrupt, it would be a force to the left in politics.

“That would be weird if I showed your emails to people,” Kelly writes back. “You don’t show them to anyone, do you? I only have a couple of friends who even know of the situation, and that was really only a precaution. I wanted them to know where to send the cops if I came up missing, hacked into pieces and put into an acid bath, etc. An erotic version of Bum Fights sounds amazing. I enjoy that show a lot. Especially that one loud crackhead with the fucked up teeth. I forget his name, but one of my best friends used to be able to imitate him pretty accurately. It was awesome. Was it Bling-Bling? Or did he just use that phrase a lot? Monday will likely work, but maybe 3 or 4? (That will give me time to shove my heap of laundry under my dresser, kick out all the homeless people that sleep in the corners, and hopefully plunge that dead fetus that has been clogging the toilet all week, etc. Should have just microwaved it, eh?) It’s weird to meet in the afternoon, but since that’s what works for you, I can probably skip my after-class nap for a day. . Jesus freaks piss me off as well. Mostly because they refuse to respect the opinions of others most of the time. If ‘g-rated’ spent half an hour with me when I’m not playing nice, she’d likely have to be chemically sedated and committed. I have a way with people, you know. . We should just do our own version of ‘To Catch A Predator’! I’ll do the dirty chat to lure them in, I have a friend who looks 13 to be our decoy, and you can be Chris Hanson. Instead of arresting them, we can taser them and then beat the shit out of them, leaving them in a ditch somewhere. Or whatever. It would be fun!”

“Okay, now I really am going to bed lol,” Steve replies. “Sleep is difficult at times, but such is life. No, I don’t ever show any emails to anyone, nor do I let anyone know where I am going, lol. Yeah, it may sound reckless, but it’s not something that’s an everyday occurrence. I can usually read and feel out people from the way they write, and would never meet up with someone who I didn’t initially trust. I tend to be a fairly private person in general. . The afternoon shouldn’t be too unusual! The evening isn’t the only time for stress relief!”

Steve and Kelly continue their emails later in the morning of February 2: “Well, you’re probably safe to trust me,” Kelly writes. “You should know that I really only kill minorities and children. I just give a vague explanation of the situation, really. It would be awkward to have to explain it.:). . I really don’t want to have to work tonight. Those tards better be on their best behavior. (And yes, I am aware that ‘tard’ is not the pc term these days. .).”

“Well, give me a call later if you’re bored at work,” Steve writes. “I should answer, as long as I’m not in the middle of preparing the acid bath. The garbage disposal is just not cutting it anymore. Oh yeah, I was watching this movie on cable the other day called ‘Drive Thru’ where the villain was a disgruntled fast food mascot. It started off hilarious, with a bunch of wiggers going through a drive thru late at night and getting slaughtered, (one of them gets his face deep-fried), but then (unfortunately) started to take itself too seriously. I love, LOVE B-movies, but not ones that try to be serious after showing cool kill scenes. Also, you should check out the new Rambo, if only to see the gratuitous violence and hidden messages, (i.e. patriotism good, god good, violence good, pedophilia bad. . seriously there messages strewn through Rambo and it is incredibly comical at times). It’s a Lionsgate distributed film (the film distributors of SAW and many other great movies), and it was entertaining. Probably the most violent movie I’ve seen in years. If you’re into shockingly violent movies (with a minor message at the end) see Cannibal Holocaust. Besides having the best movie title ever, it was made in 1979 and is still the most violent, graphic, and craziest movie I’ve ever seen in my life. Nothing tops it!”

Why is this the best movie title ever? Is it the combination of Nazi and horror, the chopping of bodies in fantasy and in real life brought together?

“Garbage disposals clog too easily on the big parts,” Kelly replies. “You have mentioned the Cannibal Holocaust movie before. I want to see it, but I’m not sure where to find such a film.:). . How do you feel about some light bondage? Haha”

“Light bondage sounds fascinating;-),” Steve writes. “Or, we could go more extreme if you so desire. . it’s your call, as I am willing to try anything, (and you know I will respect limits and what not). . Hmmm, I may still have handcuffs somewhere (they are trick handcuffs, so no worries about losing a key, lol), and still have an eye mask, (intended for sleeping, but whatever!). I’ll be sure to bring them.”

The next day, on Sunday, February 3, 2008, Steve decides to commit mass murder. He’s been off his Prozac for almost a week, and there’s an important event in the local news. The day before, at Lane Bryant, a clothing store in suburban Chicago, an armed robber, believed to be a black man, shot and killed five women execution-style in a botched robbery. With this event, Steve begins buying what he’ll need, beginning with extra magazines for his Hi-Point.380 pistol, purchased online.

He has an email exchange that day with Kelly titled “Why can’t Helen Keller have children?” Kelly answers the joke with: “Because she’s dead, haha. My residents are scared of storms, so this could be an entertaining evening of terror. . How was your weekend? email me back if you’re not busy.:)”

“No, I’m too busy,” Steve writes back. “Just plotting world domination and all. Did you hear about the ‘man in black’ at Lane Bryant? Crazy World! Tell them that the thunder is just Satan bowling. The bigger the pin count, the louder the thunder. Or something like that. .”

I have to wonder what “pin count” really refers to. Steve seems taken by the idea of fame through a high pin count. Perhaps he also believes in his historical importance, or even believes he is teaching in some way, similar to how Jigsaw teaches.

Steve sent a quote to Mark on February 2, a famous quote from Hermann Goering, second in command of the Third Reich and Luftwaffe commander: “Naturally, the common people don’t want war; neither in Russia nor in England nor in America, nor for that matter in Germany. That is understood. But, after all, it is the leaders of the country who determine the policy, and it is always a simple matter to drag the people along, whether it is a democracy or a fascist dictatorship or a parliament or a communist dictatorship. . voice or no voice, the people can always be brought to the bidding of their leaders. That is easy. All you have to do is to tell them they are being attacked, and denounce the pacifists for lack of patriotism and exposing the country to danger. It works the same way in any country.”

“Scary how that philosophy still holds true today,” Mark says, “but, again, you see his high level of thinking versus the average person.”

“He’ll go down in history, right?” Mark says about Steve. “I always wondered too, as weird as it sounds, not did it for people, but. . We had a fascination with school shootings from the point of Cho, how he got away with thirty-two victims or whatever he did. And how he missed some victims and his gun locked and all that stuff, right? And how he had backups and stuff. So Steve was very well-versed in the methodology of how to successfully pull it off. So he knew to have the right weapons, what weapons wouldn’t jam. We had conversations in the past — and this was brought up with the school shootings — if you’re going to do a school shooting, why go to classrooms when you could do it in an auditorium, when you have more potential to get targets. So obviously he took that into consideration, too. An auditorium would be the best pick because people are going to be all in disarray and running all around and you’re not going to be able to escape, for the most part. . And he knew that. He knew he could get in from the back and set himself up, right, because you’re not going to be able to carry a shotgun. . [from the front]. He knew the right actions to take, the right methods. He obviously was smart enough to know that the police would be on hand within a few minutes. So he knew that he only had a few minutes to do as much damage and get rid of himself. Because he’s not one to. . he would never be one to be taken into custody. Just knowing his personality. And he wouldn’t want to go down with the satisfaction of someone shooting him. So he’d rather take care of himself and get it done with.