Chuck Palahniuk - Pygmy

Railing voice of operative me continue announce guilt portion deserved heaped upon Western nations according enlightened saga Pearson Report issued United Nations Conference on Trade and Development—

“Hush,” say prowling cat sister. Say, “Just shush for a minute, okay?”

Sister halted, hands extended, fingers spread feeling blackness, sensing chilled wind for sound sentry guards. Possible witness recording document via video camera.

“You’re the trainee spy,” say host sister, shaking straight finger at face of this agent. Sister touch finger to shut lips of operative me, say, “I need you to keep quiet.”

Regardless pressure for instruct sole correct political ideology-Regardless continued fallacy engaging worldview host sister.

In secret, within head, this agent reciting, Americium … antimony … argon …

Crouched posture lower primate, sprint sawtooth pattern so bisect mowed landscape largest building. Arriving sign stationed at entry lettered in English words to read: RADIOLOGICAL INSTITUTE OF MEDICINE.

Often possible conquest cat sister, sling no conscious atop mowed landscape, gift with fetus bearing same pretty eyes as operative me.

Next now arrive doors of facility, sister sling fabric sack, dive hand inside so retrieve laminated name card of host father, prosthetic human eye crafted green color glass. Cat sister dash card against box adjacent doors. Position eye at focus of box lens. Same current now, door of building, latch sound clack, angry humming. Host sister hand grasp edge released door swing so unhealed in wall stacked red-color bricks.

Voice of operative me beseech no abandon, no relegate duty mere lookout. Bid this agent accompany sister along foray for harvest resources to equip science fair project.

This agent projecting voice beg mercy, words compressed down to fast rush reedy breath delivered out constriction throat. Peaked muscle of face, forehead stiff of flaking black color paint, yawning both eye wide around and skinned glistening water. Windpipe of operative me make swallow, jump apple of Adam gulp sound. Brimming eye similar baby puppy American eat as beef.

Host sister observe delicious face expression this agent. Sister narrow eye, cast glance so whisk surround landscape, say, “Okay.” Inject hand within fabric sack, extract skins of latex for fit stretched over fingers. Deliver latex skin to this agent, during say, “Just wear these so you don’t leave a bunch of fingerprints.”

Latch door remain angry hum. Impatient to be returned so healed in wall.

Sister stretch each own hands within similar latex skins. Usher this agent so violate portal. Allow door heal, humming cease.

That now, victory of operative me encroach extreme top secret facility United State defense contractor. Surrounded lavish decadent luxury of military industrial complex. Infinite computer screen boast four-color display. Fountains dispensing chilled waters to swallow. Spa title MEN. Plethora chair atop wheels, balanced so pivot in all direction. Floor layered rich gray carpet. Lavish luxury playground deeded use of evil engineer, wicked biochemist.

Already cat sister making parade, leading this agent along labyrinth many fences upholstered elegant gray canvas, zigzagging so avoid missteps en route destination. Each writing desk allowed luxury of private fenced territory. Fastened canvas fence surface selection photographs depicting obese American infants wallowing atop arms obese parentage, smothered amid needless vast inventory playthings. Photographs of animal, dog and cat, beef and pork. Occasional soiled vessel crafted dense ceramic, residue dried caffeine, glazed with legend “World’s Greatest Dad.”

Arriving cabinet, doors of tall cabinet painted gray metal, host sister deliver fabric sack to this agent. Instruct for hands of operative me position opening of sack stretched wide. Host sister grasp cabinet handle, say, “The best loot is in here…”

Hand twist handle. Swing metal door so unhealed. Reveal interior of cabinet small packages crafted pulp paper, light cardboard. Sister commence violate each package, discover contents, and dispense into waiting fabric sack.

Perhaps mistake.

During harvest contents cabinet, sister say, “Did you hear the autopsy results on Trevor Stonefield?” Say, “My dad heard from some medical guy at the county.” Say, “Turns out, somebody was molesting him—Trevor, I mean, not the county guy…”

Certainly mistake. Collecting within fabric sack, merely color spectrum many ink pens. Harvesting small packages chrome wire bent so clip papers. Ammunition American staplers. Scissor. Additional ink pen.

Cat sister continue speech concerning Trevor autopsy, how discover recent trauma large intestine. Abrasions partially healed of rectum. Faded hematoma. Fissures torn tender membranes Trevor anus. All indicators past recent sexual abused.

Same as water bin chew white rodent. Same as Pavel. The deity models only correct behavior, killing by cancer warfare, by earthquake and cyclone. All human must justify future vicious murder by the deity.

Host sister ladling into fabric sack packages blank computer disk. Adhesive label. Tablets graph papers. Mechanical pencil. Gum eraser.

Same now, available nearby such selection nuclear missile launch codes. Tantalizing details strategic American troop movements. Plans preliminary prototype future most scientific military weapons. Abundant cornucopia every top defense secret.

Host sister, purloining more ink pen, more graph paper, say, “The police are totally going to bust somebody for butt-fucking Trevor…”

Here particular installation stockpiled delicious nuclear isotopes. Plutonium. Strontium. Delectable menu radioactive elements. In secret, reciting this agent, Uranium … radium … einsteinium … Wide selection deadly chemical, biological culture sample.

Anthrax. Ebola. Sarin.

For access, merely utilize laminate name card, green color prosthetic eye. Both secreted trouser cat sister.

Thin fabric sack stretched almost to failure, filled burden ink pens, staplers, adhesive tapes, blank disk, debris. Detritus.

Making voice of baby puppy, this agent beseech sister retreat, attain location storage of nuclear materials so private enough able exchange mouths. Saliva commingle. Regress to vault top security for generate mutual pleasure. There access smorgasbord curium, hassium, lawrencium.

Cat sister heal doors of cabinet, close handle. Turn to cast eyes upon this agent, say, “Pygmy…” Say, “Get this—you and me are going to have the same dad, so we can’t make out, and we can’t get him in trouble.” Say, “You got that?”

In secret voice operative me, within head quote jolly monarch, good-natured king Mao Tse-tung, say, “The need to shit after eating does not mean that eating is a waste of time.”

Hands of operative me encased latex, burdened anchor weight stolen pens, postage stamps. In secret, this agent say within head, debate will police arrest for sodomy clear-yellow bully. Abort deadly science fair project. Foil Operation Havoc.

Punish for sodomy by place operative me imprisoned full lifetime accompanied numerous sodomites. Such the absurdity American legal justice.

Awaiting nearby, enticing radioactive isotope polonium-210, iridium-192, cesium-137. So almost attainable, poisoned treasure of exquisite thallium. So close within reach fragrant bosom cat sister, lavish enriched thorium. Combination all glorious victory.

Quote, “The need to shit after eating does not mean that eating is a waste of time.”

Only already now, prominent buttock cat sister in retreat. Regressing away, say, “I can’t tell folks how to act in your town, but here…” Say, “Brothers and sisters just do not get busy with each other.” Trouser fabric stretched so conceal succulent host sister buttock, making rapid stealth parade toward direction sign of exit.