Даниэль Дефо - Roxana

These two Articles, if there had been no more, qualified him to be a most unbearable Creature for a Husband; and so it may be suppos’d at first Sight, what a kind of Life I led with him: However, I did as well as I could, and held my Tongue, which was the only Victory I gain’d over him; for when he would talk after his own empty rattling Way with me, and I would not answer, or enter into Discourse with him on the Point he was upon, he would rise up in the greatest Passion imaginable, and go away; which was the cheapest Way I had to be deliver’d.

I could enlarge here much, upon the Method I took to make my Life passable and easie with the most incorrigible Temper in the World; but it is too long, and the Articles too trifling: I shall mention some of them as the Circumstances I am to relate, shall necessarily bring them in.

After I had been Married about four Years, my own Father died, my Mother having been dead before; he lik’d my Match so ill, and saw so little Room to be satisfied with the Conduct of my Husband, that tho’ he left me 5000 Livres, and more at his Death, yet he left it in the Hands of my Elder Brother, who running on too rashly in his Adventures, as a Merchant, fail’d, and lost not only what he had, but what he had for me too; as you shall hear presently.

Thus I lost the last Gift of my Father’s Bounty, by having a Husband not fit to be trusted with it; there’s one of the Benefits of marrying a Fool.

Within two Years after my own Father’s Death, my Husband’s Father also died, and, as I thought, left him a considerable Addition to his Estate, the whole Trade of the Brewhouse, which was a very good one, being now his own.

But this Addition to his Stock was his Ruin, for he had no Genius to Business; he had no Knowledge of Accounts; he bustled a little about it indeed, at first, and put on a Face of Business, but he soon grew slack; it was below him to inspect his Books, he committed all that to his Clerks and Book-Keepers; and while he found Money in Cash to pay the Malt-Man, and the Excise, and put some in his Pocket, he was perfectly easie and indolent, let the main Chance go how it would.

I foresaw the Consequence of this, and attempted several times to perswade him to apply himself to his Business; I put him in Mind how his Customers complain’d of the Neglect of his Servants on one hand, and how abundance Broke in his Debt, [27] abundance Broke in his Debt : extravagance had resulted in his becoming indebted. on the other hand, for want of the Clerk’s Care to secure him, and the like ; but he thrust me by, either with hard Words, or fraudulently, with representing the Cases otherwise than they were.

However, to cut short a dull Story, which ought not to be long, he began to find his Trade sunk, his Stock declin’d, and that, in short, he could not carry on his Business, and once or twice his Brewing Utensils were extended for [28] extended for : seized by law to satisfy. the Excise; and the last Time he was put to great Extremities to clear them.

This allarm’d him, and he resolv’d to lay down his Trade; which, indeed, I was not sorry for; foreseeing that if he did not lay it down in Time, he would be forc’d to do it another Way, namely, as a Bankrupt. Also I was willing he should draw out while he had something left, lest I should come to be stript at Home, and be turn’d out of Doors with my Children; for I had now five Children by him; the only Work (perhaps) that Fools are good for.

I thought myself happy when he got another Man to take his Brewhouse clear off of his Hands; for paying down a large Sum of Money, my Husband found himself a clear Man, all his Debts paid, and with between Two and Three Thousand Pound in his Pocket; and being now oblig’d to remove from the Brewhouse, we took a House at—, a Village about two Miles out of Town; and happy I thought myself, all things consider’d, that I was got off clear, upon so good Terms; and had my handsome Fellow had but one Cap full of Wit, I had been still well enough.

I propos’d to him either to buy some Place with the Money, or with Part of it, and offer’d to join my Part to it, which was then in Being, and might have been secur’d; so we might have liv’d tollerably, at least, during his Life. But as it is the Part of a Fool to be void of Council, so he neglected it, liv’d on as he did before, kept his Horses and Men, rid every Day out to the Forest a Hunting, and nothing was done all this while; but the Money decreas’d apace, and I thought I saw my Ruin hastening on, without any possible Way to prevent it.

I was not wanting with all that Perswasions and Entreaties could perform, but it was all fruitless; representing to him how fast our Money wasted, and what would be our Condition when it was gone, made no Impression on him; but like one stupid, he went on, not valuing all that Tears and Lamentations could be suppos’d to do; nor did he abate his Figure or Equipage, his Horses or Servants, even to the last, till he had not a Hundred Pound left in the whole World.

It was not above three Years that all the Ready-Money was thus spending off; yet he spent it, as I may say, foolishly too, for he kept no valuable Company neither; but generally with Huntsmen and Horse-Coursers, and Men meaner than himself, which is another Consequence of a Man’s being a Fool; such can never take Delight in Men more wise and capable than themselves; and that makes them converse with Scoundrels, drink Belch [29] Belch : poor beer (slang). with Porters, and keep Company always below themselves.

This was my wretched Condition, when one Morning my Husband told me, he was sensible he was come to a miserable Condition, and he would go and seek his Fortune somewhere or other; he had said something to that Purpose several times before that, upon my pressing him to consider his Circumstances, and the Circumstances of his Family before it should be too late: But as I found he had no Meaning in any thing of that Kind, as indeed, he had not much in any thing he ever said; so I thought they were but Words of Course [30] Words of Course : words to be expected. now: When he said he wou’d be gone, I us’d to wish secretly, and even say in my Thoughts, I wish you wou’d, for if you go on thus, you will starve us all .

He staid, however, at home all that Day, and lay at home that Night; early the next Morning he gets out of Bed, goes to a Window which look’d out towards the Stables, and sounds his French Horn, as he call’d it; which was his usual Signal to call his Men to go out a hunting.

It was about the latter-end of August , and so was light yet at five a-Clock, and it was about that Time that I heard him and his two Men go out and shut the Yard-Gates after them. He said nothing to me more than as usual when he us’d to go out upon his Sport; neither did I rise, or say any thing to him that was material, but went to-sleep again after he was gone, for two Hours, or thereabouts.

It must be a little surprizing to the Reader to tell him at once, that after this, I never saw my Husband more; but to go farther, I not only never saw him more, but I never heard from him, or of him, neither of any or either of his two Servants, or of the Horses, either what became of them, where, or which Way they went, or what they did, or intended to do, no more than if the Ground had open’d and swallow’d them all up, and no-body had known it; except as hereafter.

I was not, for the first Night or two, at-all surpriz’d, no nor very much the first Week or two, believing that if any thing Evil had befallen them, I should soon enough have heard of that; and also knowing that as he had two Servants and three Horses with him, it would be the strangest Thing in the World that any thing could befal them all, but that I must some time or other hear of them.