Фэнни Флэгг - The Wonder Boy of Whistle Stop

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I was feeling so down, then you called and here I am, sailing on the deep blue sea without a care in the world.”

Evelyn said, “And if it hadn’t been for Ninny, I would never have met you or your father. Or Virgil.”

Evelyn picked up her piña colada and held it up. “Let’s drink to Ninny Threadgoode.”

Ruthie joined her, “Hear! Hear! To Ninny Threadgoode. Wherever you are!”

Just then, the Hawaiian orchestra started playing “Lovely Hula Hands” and Evelyn turned to Ruth. “Wanna do it?”

“Oh, why not. You only live once, right?”

“Right, and if you’re lucky, twice!”

Once they were out on the dance floor doing the hula steps they had just learned, a man named Morrie at the next table whispered to his wife. “Irma, look at those two gals go. That heavyset one sure can move.”

KISSIMMEE, FLORIDA

1989

IDGIE HAD ALWAYS threatened to come up to Maryland and visit Bud and Peggy, but she never had. After Julian died, she was left to manage his orange groves and run her fruit and honey stand alone.

And then, too, she had been busy tending to official duties. After many years of her holding court at the fruit stand, everybody in town had started calling Idgie “The Mayor,” and ten years later, darned if they didn’t officially elect her as the first female mayor of Kissimmee. At the time they’d made a big deal out of it, and The Miami Herald sent a reporter to interview her. But Idgie, being Idgie, had her photo taken alongside two of Julian’s old nanny goats, telling the reporter that they were senior members of her city council.

—

DURING THOSE YEARS, Bud and Peggy had planned to get back down to visit her, too, but they had been so busy running the clinic together and raising Ruthie that they had not made it. Bud would never forgive himself for that. Idgie had raised him, paid for his college, and encouraged him all his life. He and Peggy had planned to retire in Florida, and buy a house next to Idgie. It would be so much fun. They could go fishing, and bang around in the woods just like the old days. But that had never happened.

Idgie hadn’t told them how ill she was, or they would have moved heaven and earth to get down there sooner. They thought they had all the time in the world. So had Idgie. She never did slow down, but finally, after she got so weak she couldn’t do things for herself, she moved to a local nursing facility. Every day, up until the last few days, her room was filled with visitors and AA friends.

When the doctor told Helen, a hospice nurse who had been taking care of Idgie, that it was time to call in the relatives, it was sad news. Helen had grown so fond of Idgie these past weeks. So after having a good little cry in the bathroom, she pulled herself together and went into Idgie’s room.

Idgie smiled at her weakly and said, “Good morning, sunshine.”

Helen started moving some of the flower arrangements around, and casually said, “Honey, the doctor thinks it might be a good idea if we call Bud, and just let him know you’re here.”

Idgie looked alarmed and struggled to sit up. “Oh, Helen, no. Promise me you won’t call Buddy.”

“Well, sweetie, don’t you think he should know?”

“No. That boy is busy and he doesn’t need to run all the way down here. It’ll be too upsetting for him to see me lookin’ like an old bag of bones. Promise me you won’t call him.”

“Well…if that’s what you want.”

“It is. And, besides, I’m ready to go on to a better place, as they say.” Then she winked at Helen. “Unless, of course, I go straight to hell. But that wouldn’t bother me. Hell couldn’t be any hotter than Florida in August.”

—

THEY SAID SHE had a peaceful ending. When Helen called Bud and let him know, she explained to him why she had not called him sooner. He was sad to hear it, but he understood. Idgie knew it would have been too hard on both of them. Besides, in her will, she had named Bud as her sole heir, so there could be no guessing on his part about how she felt about him. It had been easier for her to say goodbye that way. Idgie hadn’t wanted a service of any kind. All she wanted was to be taken back to Whistle Stop and buried next to Ruth and the rest of her family. And she was.

Imogene “Idgie” Threadgoode

1908–1989

HAPPY TO BE HOME

BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA

RUTHIE ARRIVED AT Evelyn’s house just in time for lunch, and after they had caught up on all the news, Ruthie said, “I’m curious, what was the idea you want to run by me?”

Evelyn smiled. “It’s just a little something I’ve been thinking about.”

“What?”

“About the two of us and our situations. I’m a widow, and you’re a widow.”

“Sad but true.”

“So, do you think you’ll ever get married again, Ruthie?”

“I don’t think so. I could never find a man to take Brooks’s place. He was the one and only for me. But what about you?”

“Definitely not. I like being single. Besides, all the men my age want young chicks, or else they want somebody to take care of them.”

“That’s true.”

“So, Ruthie, what are we going to do with the rest of our lives?”

Ruthie looked at her and said, “Funny you should ask. I have absolutely no idea.”

“Well, funny enough I do. Finish your tea and get in the car.”

—

AS THEY WERE driving, Evelyn had a big smile on her face, and that piqued Ruthie’s curiosity even more. She still didn’t know enough about Birmingham to know where they were going, but as far as she could tell, they seemed to be driving out of town and then circling around.

“Where are you taking me? Back to Georgia?”

“You’ll see…soon enough.”

Evelyn followed the voice on her GPS and made a left turn and drove down a long, one-lane gravel road and pulled up to a spot by some railroad tracks and stopped the car. “Here we are.”

Ruthie looked around. There was nothing much to see but junk and a bunch of old vine-covered buildings. “I guessed that, but where is here?”

“Hop out and I’ll show you.” Ruthie got out and Evelyn said, “Welcome to Whistle Stop.”

“What? You’re kidding. This…is Whistle Stop? Oh my gosh. Are you sure?”

“Yes, I’m sure. I just bought it.”

“What?”

“I own it!”

Ruthie looked around at the piles of junk and weeds everywhere. “But why would you buy it?”

“Well…you’re looking for something to do, and so am I. So, let’s you and me open up the old Whistle Stop Cafe again. And maybe even the whole town. Wouldn’t Bud love that?”

“Of course,” said Ruthie. “He would be thrilled, but how can we do it? I mean, look, it’s all falling down.”

“Easy. I had my guys look into it, and they can get some of the original building plans from the county planning office. We save what buildings we can, and then rebuild what we can’t, following the old plans.”

“Really?”

“Yes. So what do you say? It’ll be a lot of fun. I know it’s a big project, but we can do it.”

“But, Evelyn, won’t it cost a lot of money to do something like that?”

Evelyn waved it off. “Oh, honey, I’ve got lots of money to invest, and I’d rather do this than have it sit in a bank.”

“Really?”

“Oh yes. And with your talent for decorating, we could make this place look just like it used to, only better.”

“Do you think we could?”

“Absolutely. Right now, it’s out in the middle of nowhere, but after we put in all new roads in and out, I think people will come in droves. In a few years, we could have a whole new town, with houses and condos.”