Martin Solly: Xenophobe's Guide to the Italians

The importance of friendship may be over-shadowed by the role of the family, but it plays a key role in Italian society. Italians are highly gregarious people and love belonging to groups or cliques. The idea of belonging to a group is seen as natural and essential.

‘Real’ friendships are usually formed early on in life, at school or with neighbours, and tend to be lifelong and important. Groups of old friends are often comparatively closed and admit few new members.

Other ‘real’ friends can be made at university, at work, playing sport, and so on, but tend to be more rare. These friendships should perhaps be considered ‘useful’ rather than ‘real’. Most adult Italians belong to a whole network of ‘useful’ friendships: the good dentist who will extract your teeth ‘at half-price’, the smart lawyer who will present your case free of charge, the lady in the bread shop who will always keep a loaf of your favourite bread.

“Most adult Italians belong to a whole network of ‘useful’ friendships.”

Then there are ‘dangerous’ friendships – those you would be better off without, often linked to ‘offers you can’t refuse’. The sister of one of Italy’s most famous judges, who was killed by a car bomb while leading the Palermo courts in their fight against the mafia, is continuing her brother’s fight. She says she has few friends, commenting that it is exactly when people start being too friendly that you really have to worry.

Visitors sometimes accuse the Italians of wearing their hearts on their sleeves, but this ‘superficial’ friendliness is often misunderstood. They are being treated as friends without anything but friendship being expected in return, something that Italians rarely grant each other. There are no strings attached: they will not be asked to help Salvatore’s second cousin Concetta find a job when she comes to their country in the spring.

“Much of Italian life is lived in public, and so the home tends to be treated like a star’s dressing room where Italians go to change and relax between acts.”

The Italians are eminently practical, and everything must have its use. Italian homes tend to be small and beautifully looked after, with the number of rooms kept to a minimum. Guest bedrooms are rare – “They can stay in a hotel, can’t they?” Much of Italian life is lived in public, and so the home tends to be treated like a star’s dressing room where Italians go to change and relax between acts. Most homes have one room where visitors can be welcomed which contains all the best furniture and pictures. However, this is usually off-limits to the family and so rarely used that in winter it is freezing cold; there seems no sense in heating it.

Many Italian families have a second or even third home, at the seaside or in the mountains. These are generally small, one- or two-room apartments with bunk beds where the whole family can sleep on holiday.

Land tends to be considered much too valuable for growing flowers (unless, of course, they can be sold), so Italian gardens are almost always kitchen gardens, and the Italians are brilliant at growing large quantities of wonderful fruit and vegetables on tiny plots of land, or even on their balconies.

Outsmarting other Italians, who can then be mocked as slow and gullible (or fesso ), is central to the Italian psyche, and is generally regarded as a positive virtue, as long as it is successful. Thus Italians rather admire and even envy the clever dick ( il furbo ) who connives to get to the front of the traffic jam and then jumps the red light and goes roaring off ahead of everyone else.

“Italians grow up knowing that they have to be economical with the truth.”

If he is seen by the traffic police, chased and stopped, the furbo will then swear blind that his wife is about to give birth, and that he has to get home as fast as possible to get her to the maternity hospital, and go roaring off again, with a police escort. Anything goes in the pursuit of outsmarting others, from the bending of rules whenever possible, to the telling of lies. Italians grow up knowing that they have to be economical with the truth. All other Italians are, so if they didn’t play the game they would be at a serious disadvantage. They have to fabricate to keep one step ahead.

Not getting away with something is the main risk involved, but it is generally regarded as an acceptable one. After all, that ticket for shooting the lights might never need to be paid, especially if the driver’s cousin who works in the police department reminds the traffic policeman that they both support the same football team and lets him know that the driver just happens to have a spare ticket for the big match on Sunday afternoon.

“Losing face is considered far worse than being found out.”

Losing face is considered far worse than being found out, and Italians will often make and accept a whole series of what seem to be completely unnecessary or highly improbable excuses in order not to be seen to be at fault. Convenient euphemisms like, “I mislaid your phone number” or “Your letter never arrived”, are so much easier to say than admitting that you underestimated the importance of a swift reply, and thus appearing a complete fesso .

Italy has the greatest number of taxes and some of the highest rates of taxation in Europe, but this is not a problem because Italians are famous for not paying them. The government takes this into consideration when calculating their demands. This has led to some misunderstandings. When Trieste passed from the Austro-Hungarian Empire to Italy in 1918, the people paid the taxes they were asked to pay. The tax inspectors immediately asked them to pay double the next year, working on the principle that people never paid more than 50% of what they could pay.

By and large salaried workers are unable to avoid paying taxes as these are deducted at source. Freelancers and the self-employed however do their best to avoid declaring anything more than minimal earnings, which enables them to benefit from Italy’s welfare system which is weighted in favour of those with lower incomes.

“It is estimated that up to a third of Italy’s economic activity is carried out unofficially.”

Servicing the Italian national debt is no easy job, and the government often has recourse to financial amnesties to bring in revenue; for example, a building amnesty permitted all those who had broken the laws relating to construction to regularise their position by paying a fine. These amnesties are quite successful in raising money, but the reverse side is that they tend to encourage others to risk breaking the law, so the cycle continues. They also help to explain the building speculation, often executed with an almost total absence of planning permission, which has ruined some of Italy’s most beautiful beaches.

It is estimated that up to a third of Italy’s economic activity is carried out unofficially and so is outside the reach of the official statistics and thus, by implication, of the tax office. This economia sommersa (hidden economy) is made up of nero (black-work, i.e., moonlighting) at all levels (not only the plumber, but the surgeon, too, will work in nero whenever possible) and of income from criminal activities (drug smuggling, cigarette smuggling, prostitution, bribes). It explains why though their country is always on the verge of bankruptcy, Italians manage to look so affluent.

Italians are obsessed with security. They have to be for crime is rampant. In Turin alone a car theft can occur every hour, a bag snatching every hour and a half, and a burglary every two hours. These days pickpocketing in the cities has reached levels the Artful Dodger would be proud of, and street robbery and break-ins are too commonplace for comment. So Italians invest in wonderful alarm systems and padlocks, turning their houses and shops into miniature fortresses.