Christy Lockhart - Let's Have A Baby!

She remained silent.

Outside, a layer of frost had painted the budding branches on trees...trees that stood as solitary against the elements as she felt against Kurt.

As far as she looked, there wasn’t another house in sight. The vista of high mountain prairie stretched before her, boldly spreading out until surrendering at the base of Eagle’s Peak.

She’d known Kurt and Mary when their parents had bought their first few acres of land. Now, as sole owner, Kurt had turned it into a thousand. Sheer determination accomplished his goals, Miss Starr had once reported.

Jessie belatedly realized she should have recognized that Kurt’s determination would prove to be her undoing.

Was it only last night that Kurt and his home represented hope?

The scent of strong coffee permeated the oversize room. The sound of a satisfying sizzle accompanied the aroma. She turned in time to see him dribble the rest of the whipped eggs into the waiting iron skillet.

Her body betrayed her. Her stomach growled.

Without offering a second time, he poured himself a mug of coffee, taking it straight up, the way one of her foster father’s had, with whiskey.

That memory made her shiver.

“Cold?”

From the bones, out. Didn’t Kurt miss a thing? “I’m fine. As fine as someone who’s been kidnapped can be.”

“Good.”

She scowled at him, without any effect. He took another drag from the mug, and when the toaster popped up two perfect slices of bread, her stomach growled once more.

Kurt removed a single plate from the cupboard, then pulled a knife and fork from a drawer. “Even a condemned man gets a last meal,” he stated. “It’s okay to admit defeat.”

“You don’t know me.”

“I intend to.”

Their gazes connected. He held it as captive as he’d earlier held her body. In that moment, things crystallized. Kidnapping her hadn’t been an impulse. She should have known that. He did things carefully, calculatingly.

To win.

A second shiver, this time nothing to do with a chill, raced through her.

“There’s enough for both of us. If you intend to fight me, you need to keep your strength up.”

He’d offered her a way out without having to back down. She appreciated that more than words could express. He wasn’t an ogre. At least not all of the time. “You cooked, I’ll do the dishes.”

“Lady, I might never let you go.” He set another place at the table and fed a couple more slices of bread into the toaster’s waiting slots. “So, Jessie,” he said, pouring her an unasked for—but very much needed—cup of coffee. “What are you going to tell your child when he asks about his father?”

Hunger faded. His chivalry had only been an act to catch her off guard. He was an ogre.

She slid into a chair, her spine supported by the rigid back. “I was going to decide on that when the time was right.”

“How many other things haven’t you thought about? Isn’t there a place on the birth certificate for the father’s name?”

“Of course.”

“And if I’d agreed to your business arrangement, would you have put my name there?”

She wrapped her hands around the mug he’d placed in front of her, not because she was going to take a drink, but because she needed something to hang on to, something to do.

She should have realized Kurt would show no quarter; he hadn’t last night, nor had he given up this morning. Up until three hours ago, she’d thought tenacity was a positive trait.

Time ticked, tension threading between each second.

“Would you have put my name there?” he repeated very, very quietly.

“No.”

Thunder clouded his eyes, darkening them to stormy forest green. His brow furrowed and a pulse thumped in his temple. She should have lied.

She should have lied.

“And you wanted me to keep quiet about it being my kid? You wanted me to sit back and live in the same town as you and watch you raise our child, my child, my child, and pretend nothing happened, that I had no part in it?”

The words were carefully cloaked in a quiet tone that scared her much more than his anger.

At that moment, she saw things clearly from Kurt’s point of view. She winced.

She’d always considered herself unselfish—until she was faced with the awful realization that in asking him to help her out, she had been anything but unselfish.

He shoved his untouched plate toward the middle of the table.

She shrunk back.

“Hadn’t thought of that, either?”

This time, his question landed with a squeeze around her midsection, like a lasso inexorably being tightened, cutting off her air.

“Why, Jessie?”

She didn’t pretend to misunderstand. Kurt wanted answers, deep answers, ones that threatened to bare her soul. And he deserved them.

She doubted she’d done anything more painful in her entire life.

“You were right earlier,” she admitted quietly, looking at him and accepting the full force of the hostility he directed toward her. “When you said I was trying to make up for what I didn’t have, you were right.” Until now, she hadn’t been honest with anyone, including herself.

Jessie hoped he’d acknowledge what she’d said and allow both of them to move on. Instead he remained silent, waiting while she exposed the secrets she’d rather keep buried.

“I’ve never told anyone else this, not even Mary.”

He nodded.

Realizing that was all the encouragement he intended to give her, she continued. “I grew up believing in ideals. I wish I still did. I was found on the steps of the church. The doctors thought I was about a week old.”

Kurt cursed.

“No one knew where I came from, or when I was born. I’ve never had a birthday celebration. I don’t even know when my real birthday is.”

Jessie stared into the inkiness of the cooling black coffee. “I never had my own room, my own clothes, my own family.” She paused, the past mingling with the present. “The only thing I ever truly had of my own was the teddy bear that they found me with.”

A newly forming tear prickled the corner of her eye. She wished more than anything, that she could blink it away. “Even that, one of my foster parents took away when I misbehaved.”

She looked at Kurt then. The furrow between his brows had eased, but not the anger. She wondered, though, if it was still directed at her. “I wouldn’t eat my peas,” she said, the distance of years not helping her to make sense of the incident. “And for that, they took away my teddy bear. I cried myself to sleep for three nights. No one cared.”

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