Julia Deering - The Playful Parent - 7 ways to happier, calmer, more creative days with your under-fives

We’re following the leader wherever (s)he may be

We’re gonna dust the table, the table, the table *

We’re gonna dust the table wherever it may be

Vacuuming

When they were very young, my own children were scared of our vacuum cleaner – so much so that one of us used to vacuum while the other took them out for a walk! But some children like the noise and some babies are even soothed by it so much that they fall asleep to it, apparently.

To make the vacuum cleaner more appealing, why not turn it into a hungry, crumb-eating creature by giving it a face. Just add some googly eyes, paper or craft foam brows, ears and nose with some double-sided sticky tape (or Blu-tack for less permanence) just where your little one thinks they should go.

Every time the vacuum cleaner needs to come out, say it’s time for another ‘Adventure with the Crumb-Eating Creature’. The children will love helping with the story (shouting it out above the noise) about where it needs to go to today, what it will eat, and how it has to go to bed when the cleaning is finished.

You can buy a range of toy vacuum cleaners (these are very popular with most preschoolers), but if you don’t want that expense you could simply raid the recycling box for tubes and boxes and, sticking them together with some heavy duty gaffer tape, help your child make their own mini vacuum cleaner. Your children will love copying you with their own scaled-down, lightweight model. I have also seen some children as young as four using a hand-held dust-buster most effectively. If you feel your child is up to this, let them have a go (closely supervising them, of course) and enjoy the fact that they will actually be effectively contributing to getting the carpet clean. (For other details of junk modelling using recycled materials, see here.)

Sweeping the floor

Sweeping is actually quite a complex task that requires a great deal of dexterity and coordination. It’s unlikely that a child under five will be able to achieve what we might call effective sweeping but this doesn’t mean it can’t be a way to play. Usually, soon after the sweeping action is explored, young children drift to playing with the broom in an altogether different way; I am of course talking about using it like a horse, or a balance beam, or if they’ve had any exposure to witches in stories such as Julia Donaldson’s brilliant Room on the Broom – they’ll be flying round the room on it. Or maybe they’ve just seen you being particularly playful with your broom at some point, and are just copying what they’ve seen.

Invest in a miniature (but effective) broom and dustpan set – otherwise you’ll end up tussling over ownership far more than sweeping or playing. Recently I read that just a few years ago, Montessori teachers in the US – who promote sweeping as an important developmental play opportunity for young children – had great difficulty in finding miniature, non-gendered brooms in natural materials – in fact they worked with a manufacturer to enable the making of such ‘specialist’ brooms to be continued. It’s amazing how many good-quality miniature sets are available now, and it means that if your child insists on using the grown-up version, you can still carry out the task effectively while your child is copying you, albeit with equipment on a scale that makes you feel like a giant.

You can have fun mixing up the order of the three parts of the sweeping process by using a song to help you do it right while you and your little one sweep:

Sweep the dirt (sung to the tune of ‘Head, shoulders, knees and toes’)

Sweep the dirt into a pile, to a pile (repeat)

Sweep and sweep and sweep and sweep

Sweep the dirt into a pile, into a pile.

Push the pile into the pan, into the pan (repeat)

Push and push and push and push

Push the pile into the pan, into the pan.

Tip the dirt into the bin, into the bin (repeat)

Tip and tip and tip and tip

Tip the dirt into the bin, into the bin.

Remember to give praise and tell your child what a good helper they are – even though you may well have to re-do the sweeping they attempted after they’ve scooted off to do something else. They’ll definitely be back for more, and gradually their sweeping (and broom-flying) skills will improve.

Washing up

Washing up is often seen as one of the more tedious chores for grown ups. Despite this, young children seem to find it a real treat. When I asked via social media which chores are children’s favourites, washing up came out on top. Of course we can’t get our under-fives to scour pans, safely wash cutlery or clean the best china, but they will easily and enthusiastically manage plastic plates, bowls, cups and wooden utensils.

Invest in an extra washing-up bowl, washing-up brush and a sponge or cloth so that they can sometimes wash up as you do. Just set it all up nearby – either on the floor (with an old towel underneath to prevent slips) or on a low table that they can stand at. You won’t be able to rely on their skill at cleaning, but you can rely on their skill at playing. To them, washing up means a sensory play opportunity; they’ll splish-and-splash in the warm, bubbly water for ages – pouring and swirling, scooping and wiping. And if some of the lunch things get clean in the process – that’s a bonus! They’ll still think they’re washing up whether the items are spotless or not. Young children are more likely to stay interested in washing up if you keep it as an occasional activity that’s different to other water-based play. Offering it as a grown-up job, to help you, is all part of its irresistible charm, it seems.

Dishwasher

If your household has a dishwasher, you can still get your little one to help with the dishes; they’ll happily help load it with the dirty stuff or empty it of its sparkly clean contents as long as you make the process fun.

Set yourselves a challenge – can the dishwasher be emptied before a certain song on the radio finishes? Your toddler could help by collecting the non-breakables.

Play a spotting game where all of the dirty or clean cups, then forks, then bowls and so on are identified by the children and put away by the grown up. Do this against the clock and you’ll have a really fun game on your hands.

Setting and clearing the table

Setting the table can be a fun activity for young children. When my daughter turned four, she went through a phase of turning our dining table into a restaurant every time I asked if anyone would like to do the job. She would make a central flower arrangement, menus, place cards – the lot! This became quite time-consuming in the end, so I had to make sure I asked at least twenty minutes before the meal was actually ready, but it did mean that she happily, and creatively, took on the task.

Make a ‘let’s pretend’ cafe:

Make some personalised placemats; trace around the shapes of where the plate, cup and cutlery should go if your children find it hard to remember. Decorate large paper doilies or A4 paper for temporary mats (or if you have access to a laminator, cover them and they will last longer and be wipeable) with drawings, stickers or pictures cut from magazines.