Richard Webber - The Complete A–Z of Everything Carry On

Before long, the new faces, except for the efficient WPC Passworthy, are causing chaos wherever they tread. After coming to the assistance of a distraught mother who thinks she’s lost her little boy, Gorse decides to play around on the boy’s scooter, only to find himself bumping into PC Benson, who’s out walking Lady, a police dog. As they crash down some steps, the dog runs off.

Benson regards himself as an expert in the physiology of the criminal mind, claiming he can spot a crook a mile off. When a man bumps into him in the street, Benson doesn’t regard the man as anything but a law-abiding member of the public, that is until his trousers fall to the ground because the passer-by has stolen his braces. Another example of his ineptness sees him trying to persuade a supposed car thief from committing a crime, only to discover that embarrassingly he’s accusing a detective sergeant from the CID.

With the threat of suspension hanging over their heads, the new recruits pound their beats in pairs. Potter and Benson spot the getaway car involved in a recent robbery, and identifying a way of redeeming themselves for the earlier fiascos, try and find the robbers themselves. Eventually assisted by Gorse, they manage to catch the crooks in an abandoned house but it’s the lazy, inefficient Inspector Mills who takes all the credit and is transferred to an area college where, ironically, he’ll be in charge of morale and discipline, with Sergeant Wilkins taking over the running of the station after his long-overdue promotion to inspector.

On television, he appeared in, among others, A Show Called Fred , Blackadder the Third , You Rang, M’Lord? , Rentaghost and provided the voices for the popular children’s show, Torchy the Battery Boy. But he’s probably best remembered in this medium for his performances as Monsieur Alfonse, the undertaker, in the sitcom ’Allo, ’Allo! and as Uncle Sammy Morris in the holiday camp sitcom, Hi-de-Hi!.

Awarded an MBE in 1991 for services to showbusiness, Connor was entertaining on BBC’s Noel’s House Party just two days before he died in 1993, aged seventy-five.

CONSTABLE

Played by Billy Cornelius

The police constable appears in Girls alongside the police inspector at the Palace Hotel investigating reports that Patricia Potter, who’s suspected of being a man, is back at the hotel.

CONSTABLE

Played by Kenneth Connor

The Parish Constable in Dick attempts to catch the elusive criminal, Dick Turpin. He’s way past his best-before date, though, and is rather hopeless when it comes to capturing the legendary highwayman.

CONSTABLE, CARRY ON

see feature box here.

CONSTABLE, CONSTABLE CHARLIE

Played by Kenneth Connor

One of the newly-graduated police constables who arrives on the scene in Constable . A nervous, highly superstitious man who can’t even attempt to develop a relationship with WPC Passworthy until he knows whether her birthday lands under the correct planetary sign, such is his reliance on astrology.

CONTE FILLIPO DI PISA

Played by Alan Curtis

Arrives in Henry to talk to Cardinal Wolsey about King Henry’s application for an annulment of his wedding to Queen Marie of Normandy. He’s employed by the Pope and travels as the emissary of the Vatican to explain that the Pope is both outraged and morally shocked but will overlook his concerns in return for 5000 pieces of gold.

CONWAY, BERT

Played by Jimmy Logan

A loud-mouthed Scot who joins the Wundatours party travelling to the Mediterranean resort of Elsbels in Abroad. He jokes to Stuart Farquhar, the courier, about heading off for a dirty weekend, but it’s clear that is what he hopes the trip turns out like, especially when he eyes up Sadie Tomkins from the moment she climbs into the coach, even though he’s competing with Vic Flange for her affections. Makes his living as a bookmaker.

Bert Conway (Jimmy Logan, right) chats up Sadie Tomkins (Barbara Windsor) in the Med ( Abroad )

COOK

Played by Anthony Sagar

In Cruising, the Cook is concerned when he realises his boss, Wilfred Haines, is suffering seasickness despite only just leaving port. When Haines makes a hasty dash for the toilets, he pushes into the Cook squashing a creamy dessert all over his face. Seen again, later, being accused by the chef of taking too long cracking open a pile of eggs.

COOK

Played by Mario Fabrizi

A Cook on the Happy Wanderer , he’s seen in Cruising confirming to Wilfred Haines that the ship is actually sailing.

COOK, CORPORAL

Played by Patricia Franklin

In England seen dishing out the so-called food in the NAAFI at the experimental 1313 anti-aircraft battery.

COOKING FAT

In Loving , Jenny Grubb thinks the porter’s unseen black cat is called Cooking Fat in the flats where she lives.

COOKSON

For Cookson, the constable in Girls, see ‘Constable’.

COOLING, MISS

Played by Esma Cannon

The dithering, nervous old lady with a heart of gold tries her best as Bert Handy’s secretary in Regardless. Not the most reliable person in the world, she gets messages confused, which explains why Sam Twist, one of the employees, has a wasted journey to the Forth Bridge, instead of providing a fourth at a game of bridge.

COOMBS, PAT

Roles: Patient in Doctor and New Matron in Again Doctor

Born in London in 1926, Pat Coombs started her working life as a nursery school assistant, trained at LAMDA and began working on stage before establishing herself as a familiar face on television, primarily playing comedy parts or working as a foil for well-known comedians.

Her early credits included Lana Butt in the pilot of Beggar My Neighbour and the three subsequent series transmitted in 1967–68. She also appeared as Violet Robinson in Lollipop Loves Mr Mole in 1971 and the series, Lollipop , the following year. Other series in which she was cast included two runs of Don’t Drink the Water! , four series of You’re Only Young Twice , In Sickness and in Health, Birds of a Feather and EastEnders.

Coombs, who died at Denville Hall, the retirement home for actors, in 2002, made a handful of film appearances in productions such as Adolf Hitler – My Part In His Downfall and Ooh! You Are Awful . In the mid-1990s she was diagnosed with the bone disease osteoporosis but continued working until her final days, recording an episode of the radio series, Like They’ve Never Been Gone , with June Whitfield and Roy Hudd, just months before her death.

COOPER, JUNE

Roles: Girl in Don’t Lose Your Head and Hospitality Girl in Up The Khyber

Other screen credits include playing a stewardess in an episode of 1970’s Mister Jerico.

COOTE, CHARLES

Played by Charles Hawtrey

Chief designer at W.C. Boggs, manufacturers of quality toilet ware, the foppish Charles Coote is seen in At Your Convenience. He lodges with Agatha Spanner, with whom he strikes up a relationship and intends to marry. Agatha’s devotion to Charles rankles with her son, Vic, who happens to be the union representative at the toilet ware company.

COPE, KENNETH

Roles: Vic Spanner in At Your Convenience and Cyril Carter in Matron

Born in Liverpool in 1934, Kenneth Cope is probably best known for his television appearances in shows such as That Was The Week That Was , Randall and Hopkirk (Deceased), Coronation Street and, more recently, Brookside , in which he played Ray Hilton .