Chris Curran - Her Deadly Secret

Rosie put down her cup so heavily that tea slopped into the saucer. ‘I know all this, Mum.’

Marion’s eyes flicked open. She looked surprised. As if she’d forgotten anyone was there. ‘That last week, when you were at school, we had a huge row and he was going to move out. That was why I went away that weekend. I think I wanted to believe what the police said about him. And I’m sure it was me turning against him that helped sway the jury.’ Marion had refused the defence’s pleas to turn up to the trial, and the papers had highlighted her absence, suggesting it meant she thought he was guilty. Which, of course, it did.

There was no avoiding it. ‘So what exactly is this evidence then?’

‘I can’t tell you. You have to speak to your father.’

Rosie shook her head and turned away. She might have known. It was just some madeup story from her dad, an excuse to get her over there. Nothing had changed. Except that now she knew better than to trust anything he said.

She took a deep breath, and beckoned to the girls. As they came running back she said, without looking round, ‘I need to get these two some food and then take them home.’

Her mother tried to grab her hand. ‘Please, Rosemary,’ but she pulled it away.

‘Oh no. That’s not going to happen. Nothing you’ve said makes any real difference. So, if you want to keep seeing me and Fay, you’d better accept it. I don’t ever want to hear about that man again.’

Joe

Joe watched Loretta in the back garden on her mobile, walking back and forth as she talked. She had come straight in from talking to the girls outside, taken a quick peep at Hannah and then gone out the back. Joe wished he could get out of the house too. Didn’t think he could stand being cooped up like this much longer. Longed to escape. To go back to work. Away from all the questions. But he knew what they would think.

Loretta looked smaller out of uniform, and he registered for the first time that she was a good-looking woman. The call seemed important, although she might just be ordering a pizza, but he wanted to know what she was talking about, so he went down and put the kettle on.

When she came through the back door, he had two mugs of coffee ready. Handed one straight to her so she couldn’t refuse.

She smiled and sat at the table, taking a big gulp. ‘Thanks, Joe. I needed that.’

‘Was that Monique you were talking to out the front?’ He couldn’t even try to be subtle.

‘Yes. She says she was Lily’s best friend. Seems like a nice girl.’

He found himself smiling, remembering. ‘Oh yeah, they were always together since they were little. That was all Lily worried about when she went to the secondary. She had to go to the same one as Monique and they had to be in the same form.’

‘And were they?’

‘Yes. And if they hadn’t been …’ He shook his head and looked down, stirring his coffee and trying to focus on the dark brown swirls. He’d almost said Hannah would have gone mad. An image of the two of them – Hannah, his real Hannah, not the ghostly stranger who lay upstairs, sitting with her arm around Lily, telling her they wouldn’t let her be upset, would always look out for her – came suddenly to mind. The picture was so sharp he flinched.

‘The girls mentioned a boyfriend. Did you know about him?’ Loretta said.

‘No, I mean I don’t think there was anyone.’ But, of course, he’d been working away a lot recently, so he couldn’t be sure. Hannah would have told him, though, wouldn’t she? Something as important as that?

‘Apparently, he’s connected with that sect: the commune.’

Joe stared, thinking he must have heard wrong.

‘You know, The Children of Light.’

Her gaze was steady, and he could almost feel her itching to note down his reaction. He forced himself to speak calmly although his heart was beating faster. ‘No. Lily wouldn’t have got involved with them.’

‘That’s not what Monique says. She says Lily started going there and met Samuel. Do you think Hannah knew?’

He tipped the rest of his coffee down the sink then turned to take the mug Loretta held out to him. It was obvious she was watching and waiting for more. Knew she’d hit a nerve. He put the tablet in the dishwasher, switched it on, and continued to stand, looking out at the garden. The shed door at the back was open, the grass needed cutting, and a couple of towels had been hanging on the rotary line for days.

‘Hannah was with them – The Children of Light – when we met,’ he said. He could feel Loretta’s eyes on him and had to turn and look at her. She wasn’t even pretending this was just a chat now. ‘But it was all so long ago and it couldn’t have anything to do with Lily.’

He told her the bare bones: that Hannah was an orphan, only eighteen, and he was a bit older, twenty-four. She had got mixed up with the commune when she became homeless. They gave her a bed, but she was fed up with the way they tried to run every aspect of their converts’ lives. Joe met her, they fell in love and that would have been it, but The Children made it difficult for them, kept sending people round to ask her to come back.

‘They threatened her?’

He’d almost forgotten Loretta was there. It must be one of the techniques they taught them – to become invisible. Be careful . He made himself pause and slow down. ‘I don’t think so. She just said they kept on about how she’d turned her back on the Light. Stuff like that. We laughed about it.’

‘And it stopped?’

‘Oh yeah. She hasn’t had any contact with them for years. Not that I know of anyway.’ Stupid, stupid, why did I have to say that ? Hannah doesn’t keep things from me.

‘But she’d have been angry if Lily got mixed up with them?’

‘Not angry, no.’ He wasn’t falling for that one. ‘She’d have been …’ he searched for a neutral word, ‘concerned. We both would. I mean, that was why she was so keen to get away in the first place. Didn’t want Lily growing up there.’

‘Hang on a minute, Joe, I thought you said Hannah left them when you first got together. That would have been before Lily was born, surely.’

Oh, God, she didn’t know. Hannah hadn’t told them. He took a breath. Tried to speak casually. ‘No, because when I met Hannah she already had Lily. She was nearly two. I’m not – I wasn’t – her real dad.’ Very aware of her silence he found himself rushing on. ‘But Lily knew. We told her when she was old enough. She said it didn’t matter because I was all the dad she needed. I always treated her like a dad, loved her like a dad. Well, better than a dad if mine was anything to go by.’

He knew he was rambling, could feel her waiting for the words to dribble to a stop. The guilty-sounding words. But he couldn’t stop, even though his voice was beginning to waver. ‘I thought Hannah would have told you, but I suppose she didn’t think to. As I say, we all thought of Lily as mine. Well, she was mine. I adopted her.’

There was a pause before she smiled at him. It was a lovely smile, and he could almost believe it was genuine.

‘No, Hannah didn’t mention it, but never mind. It’s best if we have all the facts.’ She folded her arms, still with that gentle smile. ‘And the biological father?’

‘He’s never been in the picture, and Hannah didn’t want to talk about him.’ He was doing it all wrong again, but Loretta seemed satisfied. She glanced at her watch and stood, putting her bag over her shoulder.

‘Well, thanks for the coffee, Joe, and for clearing things up a bit more. It’s not easy, I know, to talk about the past at a time like this, but if we can get a detailed picture it can only help. Hannah seems a bit calmer today, but if there’s an emergency you’ve got my mobile number.’