M. K. Stelmack - Coming Home To You

If Fran was still alive to contest it.

“Sorry. You were in bed?” Corporal Grayson said.

Daphne pointed to the approximate place in the moving Stagecoach. “I sleep on a hide-a-bed right behind the driver’s seat. I don’t drive so I decided to read.” Today she’d reached for the nearest book, which happened to be Jane Austen’s Sense and Sensibility .

“So...when did you notice that your godmother’s driving had become erratic?”

About a week into our trip.

There’d been a terrifying incident where Fran had nearly driven them off a steep riverside embankment in Quebec when she’d momentarily closed her eyes. After that, Daphne had wrung a promise from Fran that she would drive for only two hours at a time and never in the afternoon, when she was especially drowsy. Daphne was clear that if Fran once, just once, broke her promise, they would cancel the trip then and there. No doubt taken aback by Daphne-the-Mouse’s rare display of ferocity, Fran had agreed and since kept her word. She had a tiresome habit of keeping her promises.

The RV continued its slow reverse. As the rear wheel reached the edge of the pavement, the back end hung suspended over the ditch. Mel flipped up his hand, and the cop halted the RV immediately.

Whenever Daphne had signaled in such a way to Fran, the older woman had maintained that a minimum five-second delay existed between Daphne’s signal and Fran’s response. It was the way the rig operated, she had said. No, it was the way Fran operated.

Somehow, she had to keep Fran off the road.

Refocusing on the officer’s question, Daphne looked to the corner of the highway and the side street. “There. I noticed that we were in trouble when she turned in.” More books had tumbled off the bed and Daphne herself had pitched to the side. Kneeling on the bed, she’d watched in rising horror as Fran had cranked the wheel, screaming her curses as she tried to funnel the motor home into the entrance lane.

“I told her to stop but—but she kept saying she could handle it if I’d only let her concentrate.”

With the RV reversed as much as possible, Mel jogged past the coach to the corner of the restaurant where the driving lane curved to the back. Now that rush hour had passed, the crush of vehicles ahead had magically disappeared, so there was space to maneuver. Mel motioned with two fingers and the motor home eased forward.

“When it was clear she couldn’t handle things anymore, I tried taking over.” And here, not only her toes but her shoulders curled, too. “I accidently hit the gas instead of the brake and—” she looked at the hole in the restaurant wall “—and that happened. Fran turned off the ignition.”

The motor home glided out of view, undamming the logjam of vehicles behind it. If only her own exit plan could flow so easily. Could she nudge events to her desired outcome? “Corporal Grayson. Perhaps you aren’t aware that my companion has cancer?”

“Uh...no.”

“Quite advanced, actually. And taking medication. Perhaps, she should be warned not to be on the road.”

“Have doctors ordered her not to drive?”

They hadn’t, and Fran could prove it. Daphne nudged in another direction. “Not exactly, but as you can see, she poses a danger. Perhaps there is some consequence from this accident that would...suspend her driving. Temporarily. For an extended period.” As in months.

Corporal Grayson frowned. “You want us to charge her?” He spoke as if Daphne was suggesting an act of cruelty.

Ironically, Fran would flourish under the charge. “No, no,” Daphne said, now with little hope that they could stop this trip. “I suppose we will have to rely on common sense to prevail.”

Corporal Grayson looked steadily at her. No doubt he saw a small mousy, stale woman who couldn’t stand up to an old, dying woman. Battle of the feebles. Whatever his thoughts, though, he kept them to himself. “I’ll need to see ID for the report. Your driver’s license will do.”

Not this awkwardness. “I don’t have one. As I said, I don’t drive. I do have a learner’s permit, though.”

For the first time in the interview, Corporal Grayson turned suspicious. “Have you ever had a driver’s license?”

Meaning had she lost it due to incompetence or intoxication or criminal convictions. “No. I haven’t. Never.” Three negatives should do it.

“So...your companion has done all the driving?”

“Yes.”

“From Nova Scotia to here?”

“Yes.” Daphne let the officer chew on that. She had long ago dispensed with explanations about why she had not acquired the ticket to freedom. Truth to tell, the people in her life had long ago stopped asking. After all, she lived within walking distance of the campus and a grocery store, there was a lovely city park right across the street from her apartment, and for trips to the theater or special events, she took a taxi or Fran picked her up. The annual Jane Austen conference required her to fly to different locales, but once there she didn’t need to drive. So there was nothing amiss with a contained, well-defined, perambulatory life.

“So—” Corporal Paul scratched his jaw and looked through the window at the counter with its coffee and glass display of doughnuts “—given the condition of Ms. Hertz and that you can’t relieve her, why are you two driving across Canada?”

“She and her husband traveled coast to coast on their honeymoon, and she wanted to do it with him before she died.”

“Him?”

Fran hadn’t told anyone but Daphne and Moshe, her son, about the real reason for her farewell cross-country tour. To everyone she met on the road, she declared she simply wanted to see Canada up close one more time. But if Daphne had to confess to her driving inadequacies, then Fran’s special peculiarity could also go on record.

“Frederick. He’s dead. She keeps his ashes in...in a fire extinguisher.” Along with his wedding ring, a martini recipe and an old dollar bill.

Corporal Paul paused in his note taking. “A fire extinguisher?”

“It’s carefully labeled. She wants to deposit his ashes in the Pacific. As he requested.” Actually, Daphne wasn’t sure if that had been Frederick’s wish. So much of what he wanted had been wrapped in his wife’s whims. “She asked me to go with her. I’m her goddaughter. I’m on a sabbatical, so I agreed.” And had regretted it every day since.

The officer scanned his writing. “I’m done here. Just need to get your address while you’re in town. Where will you be staying until you sort out insurance and repairs?”

Staying? Yes, they’d have to stay for repairs. In one spot. For days. Days for her to think of how to stop Fran once and for all from their mutual destruction. Thanks be for small mercies. Her toes uncurled and her shoulders relaxed. “Is there an RV campsite close?”

“One right in town, as a matter of fact.”

If she had to push the RV from here to there herself, she’d make it happen. “Then that’s where we’re staying.”

Provided she could convince Fran.

* * *

DAPHNE FOUND FRAN lounging on her bed amid a bevy of gold and purple pillows. With her coiled gray hair and her elegant length in wide-leg silk pants and a tunic, she might’ve passed for an aging Katherine Hepburn.

“This—” Fran waved her hand at Linda, her many rings slipping to her knuckles “—this nurse thinks she knows better than me. She insists I go to the nearest hospital immediately. It’s not necessary. I’m merely dying.”

“That,” Linda said, reading the prescription label on a pill bottle, “is all the more reason for doctors to assess your condition.”

Fran shot Linda the same look that made her law students flinch. “Its condition is imminent.”