Tina Beckett - New York City Docs

Because her period was late. It was to be expected that her system would be messed up, as she’d stopped taking the Pill, so one day was no national tragedy. But she couldn’t shake the feeling there might be another reason behind it.

If so, what was she going to do? Neither of them had spoken about the issue since that day in his office, and they certainly hadn’t slept together again. But there was a nagging sense of disquiet inside her. If she was pregnant, she was going to have to let him know. It was only right. He was bound to find out, even if she tried to hide it from him. And then all hell would break loose.

And rightfully so.

She’d told him she wouldn’t try to keep the baby from him, and she wouldn’t.

But what that would entail she had no idea. She didn’t want him to start back up with the gifts… with always needing to take care of her.

She misjudged a jump and slid sideways, falling to the mat. For the third time today.

“Tessita.” Marcos clucked his tongue. “What is wrong?”

“Nothing.” Her voice came out a little too shrill, making both the studio head and Clay look sharply at her. Hell. If she kept this up, she might as well hold up a sign and let everyone know: I missed my period, and I’m terrified.

Clay touched her arm. “You okay?”

The words were said with such compassion that her eyes stung. Blinking quickly to rid them of the sensation, she went back into the “ready” stance. “I’m fine. Let’s try it again.”

“I think maybe that’s enough.”

And so it began. “Clay, I said I’m fine.”

Everyone else in the studio had already finished, and Marcos had sent them home so he could work with just the two of them. So there was no beat to drive her forward, no supportive murmurs from the circle of participants to help center her.

Just keep telling yourself that, Tessa. You know it has nothing to do with that.

Maybe she should let Clay help her. Not financially, but emotionally. There was nothing smothering about that. If she was pregnant, Molly would be this child’s half sister. And Megan and Frank Matthews would certainly want to see the baby from time to time. It was selfish to think she could cut Clay’s parents out altogether.

And her own dad would want to help, as well. They both had busy schedules, but that could change. This would force them all to slow down. To rely on each other.

It wasn’t charity. It was a village raising a child. Wasn’t that the right way to go about it? She had to believe it was.

Yes. She would talk to him about it after their session was over. Abre a mão —open her hand—as Brazilians liked to say and compromise just a little bit.

As long as he didn’t go overboard, they should be fine.

She might not even be pregnant.

Yes, but shouldn’t she be prepared if the possibility arose?

“Ready?” she asked him.

He nodded. “If we’re going to do it, let’s do it.”

This time, when she swerved, Clay matched her, move for move, step for step. It was the best session they’d had the whole time they’d practiced.

Fifteen minutes later, Marcos called time and gave her a quick hug, handing her a towel. “ Perfeito. I don’t know what that last part was all about, but do not change one thing before next week. I’m counting on both of you to put on a good show. One as good as you just did. Can you do that?”

Her eyes clipped Clay’s and smiled when he nodded. “Cross your fingers, Marcos. Because that’s as good as it’s going to get.”

“That’s as good as I need it to be.” He tossed Clay a towel, as well. “I’m going to lock up and make sure everything’s secure before I leave. I’ll see you at our last practice.”

The second Marcos was out of earshot Clay turned to her. “You’re late, aren’t you?”

Her eyes widened, although she should have realized he would figure out why she was off her game. “Yes, but only by a day. That could be because my hormones are out of whack.”

“Possibly.”

He didn’t look convinced and suddenly Tessa wanted to make sure things were okay between them. She hadn’t done that during their breakup and it was something she’d regretted… not really talking to him about things. Touching his arm, she said, “I’m so sorry for making a mess of this. If I’d just let you use protection—”

His mouth went up into a half smile. “You’re not the only one to blame. You didn’t expect me to keep you at my house and ply you with wine and kisses.”

“I don’t remember the wine, but I definitely remember the rest of it.”

Linking his fingers with hers, he gave her hand a squeeze. “It’ll be okay, Tess. No matter what happens.”

He truly believed that. That fact filled her with hope. Maybe it would be okay. “Will Molly be upset if I do end up being pregnant?”

“I think she’ll be thrilled. Especially if you give us a chance to be involved in the baby’s life.”

She glanced back to make sure Marcos wasn’t coming and nodded toward the front door. She wanted to drop a bombshell and see what happened. Open your hand, Tessa, abre a mão.

Once they were outside, she turned to him. “You talked about wanting to help.” She licked her lips. “If it comes down to it, I think I’m going to need it. I can’t expect my dad to shoulder everything on his own.”

“Of course. I already said I’d—”

“I don’t want money. I’d just like the baby to have a support system. And to know his or her sister.”

He touched her face. “You won’t regret it, honey. I promise.”

Leaning into his touch, she tried to make herself believe that it was all going to be okay, just as he’d said. Because she’d made her decision, even if she hadn’t voiced it yet. She was keeping the baby, if there was one. She just had to figure out how to have a child and still reach for her own dreams.

Letting someone help didn’t have to mean being a charity case. She would keep telling herself that. There was a world of difference between bags of used clothes and a new life that needed to be nurtured and loved. This was her way of starting down that road.

Clay’s thumb curved under her jaw. “Molly’s with me tonight, or I’d ask you to come home with me.”

“It’s okay.” She thought for a minute or two. “How would you feel about the three of us doing something together?”

“You, me and Molly?”

Tessa nodded.

“I think Molly would be thrilled. Are you sure?”

“Yes. A close friend just left for a medical mission, and I’m feeling a little lost these days. Although I think she’s the one who changed the labels on those collection jars.”

“I told you you had some loyal fans. Okay, let me call Mom and let her know we’re on our way.”

Tessa hesitated. “Will this make things awkward with your mother?”

“She loves you, Tessa. Nothing will ever change that.”

Warmth bloomed inside her that spread to every square inch of her being. “I was pretty awful when we broke up.”

He shrugged. “I never told her most of what happened. Just that we decided it wasn’t right. And if things change, she’ll be over the moon.”

“You’re a good man, Clayton Matthews.”

“Maybe not so good, because right now I’m wishing that Molly was spending the night with my mom.”

She wrapped her hand around his upper arm as they crossed the street and made their way down the sidewalk. Traffic rushed by at a frenetic pace, a harsh reminder of what they shouldn’t do. “Let’s not be in a hurry, Clay. We’ll just take everything slow and see what happens.”

“I’m up for that.” He dropped a kiss on top of her head.