Anne Winston - Ready for Marriage?

I want your children . All he could seem to think about was how they were going to create those children, and he felt his body stirring and responding to the images he couldn’t shove out of his brain. Then he realized she was still speaking.

‘‘…thought any more about whether or not you want more kids?’’

‘‘Yeah,’’ he said. ‘‘I mean, I have, and I think you’re right. Mollie should have siblings. And honestly, I don’t just want more children because of Mollie. I like being a father. I always imagined we’d have several…’’ He let the sentence trail off, realizing that it probably wasn’t such a great idea to talk about his first wife to the one he hoped to marry next, even if it was Kristin, who’d known and loved her, too.

‘‘I think that would please Deb,’’ Kristin said steadily. ‘‘She always wanted a small tribe, remember?’’

Relief rushed through him. Kristin understood him, understood what he was thinking. She always did and he shouldn’t forget that. ‘‘So,’’ he said, tightening his arm a little. ‘‘We’ve agreed that we both want more children. And I’ve told you how I feel. I don’t only want you because of Mollie, although knowing how much you care for her is a great part of the package. So what do you think?’’ He turned his body slightly to face her a little more fully. ‘‘Will you marry me?’’

A small smile curved the corners of her mouth as he looked down at her. ‘‘Yes.’’

Relief poured through him. He put his free hand up to her cheek and cradled her face. ‘‘You won’t regret it,’’ he told her, skimming his thumb along the line of her jaw. ‘‘We’re going to make a good team.’’

Her smile widened. ‘‘We already do.’’

He kept looking down at her, wondering why in the world it had taken him so long to see how lovely she was. ‘‘How soon do you want to get married?’’

She shrugged. ‘‘I don’t know. Soon?’’

‘‘How about next Sunday?’’

Her emerald eyes widened. ‘‘As in one week and one day away?’’

He nodded.

‘‘Derek, we can’t possibly plan a wedding in such a short time!’’

‘‘I don’t know that we have all that much to plan,’’ he said carefully. He should have realized that Kristin would be thinking in terms of a real wedding, with guests and flowers and cake and all the attendant hoopla. ‘‘I’d like to have a simple ceremony,’’ he said, ‘‘and unless it’s really important to you, I’d rather forget a reception and all that jazz. I can’t take a honeymoon right away but if I start arranging it now, I should be able to get away in a couple of months.’’ He and Deb had had a huge wedding with scads of family and friends, a ridiculous number of attendants, and a dance band at the lavish reception. There was no way he could go through anything like that. It would remind him too much of…of the way his life was supposed to have been.

Suddenly, he realized Kristin hadn’t said a word in response yet. Hell. Had he completely screwed this up?

But then, as he was frantically trying to figure out how to explain his feelings to her, she nodded once, briskly, and said, ‘‘That’s fine.’’

‘‘It is?’’ He couldn’t keep the surprise from his tone, but he covered it quickly. ‘‘Okay. That’s settled, then. All we have to do is get blood work done and apply for the license.’’ He shifted, pulling her across his lap as he tried to cover the awkward moment just past. ‘‘I don’t want to wait, Kris. I want you in my home.’’

‘‘I don’t want to wait, either,’’ she told him. She put her arms around his neck as her words echoed between them. He knew she’d been talking about marriage, but he could see from the sudden awareness in her eyes that she had caught her unintentional double entendre just as he had.

Slowly, holding her gaze with his, he pulled one of her hands from his neck and laid his lips against the fragile skin of her inner wrist. Using his tongue, he tested and tasted his way up her arm, lingering at the tender fold of her elbow, then sliding his lips farther up to her shoulder before skimming across the thin strap of the aqua sweater and laying his mouth on her collarbone.

Kristin’s head fell back and her eyes closed as her body slackened in his arms. Her hands moved to clasp his shoulders as he nibbled her neck and pressed light kisses up the line of her jaw until his mouth hovered over hers. ‘‘Kiss me, Kris,’’ he breathed.

He shifted his supporting arm higher to bring her head up, delighting in the willing way she lifted her mouth to his. Her lips were soft and sweet and he leisurely explored their shape for long moments before flicking his tongue across the seam of her lips. When she opened her mouth, he moved inside immediately, his tongue tangling with hers in hot, slick pleasure. As they kissed, her lithe body twisted in his arms, pressing against the growing arousal that pushed at his pants, making him all too aware that it would only take a few smooth moves to have his pants unzipped and her astride his lap.

He shuddered. ‘‘I probably shouldn’t be doing this,’’ he said. But he couldn’t resist sliding one hand over the enticing swell of her hip. He smoothed a path down her upper leg to where the short skirt stopped and uttered a silent alleluia at the feel of her soft bare thigh beneath his palm.

She placed her hands flat against his chest, palms side by side. ‘‘You can,’’ she whispered, ‘‘if you want to.’’

‘‘Oh, I want to,’’ he said, hearing his own voice come out a deep, rough growl, ‘‘but I don’t want to rush you. We can wait until we’re married.’’ A small, ignoble part of him sat up and shouted No, no, no! but he disregarded it. He was telling the truth; he didn’t want her to regret anything about their first time together. Still, it was all he could do to prevent himself from twisting his torso back and forth beneath the warm pressure of her small hands.

‘‘You’re not rushing me,’’ she said obliquely. She wouldn’t meet his eyes but kept them fixed on her hands. A surprising tenderness surged through him as he realized she was feeling shy. She was shy!

Of all the things he associated with self-possessed, confident Kristin Gordon, shy probably wasn’t anywhere near the top of the list. And yet…she was looking to him to take the lead.

Another realization swept over him. Kristin might be self-assured and smart as a whip about most things, but in this arena, he was definitely the more experienced of the two of them. Experienced…experience. Carefully, not wanting to spoil the moment, he said, ‘‘Kris? I, ah, don’t quite know how to ask you this, but—’’

‘‘I’m not a virgin.’’ Her voice was still soft, her eyes still averted.

He couldn’t define the emotions that rushed through him at that one small sentence. Relief, maybe a little. He and Deb had both been virgins their first time together and it hadn’t been a stellar experience for either of them. He’d been fast; she’d been slow. He knew he’d hurt her, but had been so overwhelmed by basic adolescent lust that he’d had no hope of making it good for her, and he’d felt terribly guilty.

Another emotion overshadowed his momentary recall. It seemed almost like…like jealousy. He tried to tell himself it was fatherly outrage, but that didn’t wash.

‘‘Who?’’ he managed. ‘‘When…?’’ The thought of some other man touching her intimately made him see red.

‘‘It was a long time ago,’’ she said softly. ‘‘My second year in college. And not something I was inspired to repeat.’’

Tenderness swept through him, washing all other feelings away. ‘‘Let me inspire you then,’’ he said. He lifted her from his lap and stood, then bent and swung her into his arms. She was easy to carry, although she struggled wildly for a moment before clutching him around the neck. ‘‘Derek! What are you doing?’’