Clive Barker - Imajica

She’d first heard news of his sickness the previous July, from his lover Clem. Despite the fact that he and Taylor had lived the same high life together, the plague had passed Clem by, and Jude had spent several nights with him talking through the guilt he felt at what he saw as an undeserved escape. Their paths had diverged through the autumn months, however, and she was surprised to find an invitation to their Christmas party awaiting her when she got back from New York. Still feeling delicate after all that had happened, she’d rung up to decline, only to have Clem quietly tell her that Taylor was not expected to see another spring, never mind another summer. Would she not come, for his sake? She of course accepted. If any of her circle could make good times of bad it was Taylor and Clem, and she owed them both her best efforts in that endeavour. Was it perhaps because she’d had so many difficulties with the heterosexual males in her life that she relaxed in the company of men for whom her sex were not contested terrain?

At a little after eight in the evening of Christmas Day, Clem opened the door and ushered her in, claiming a kiss beneath the sprig of mistletoe in the hallway before, as he put it, the barbarians were upon her. The house had been decorated as it might have been a century earlier, tinsel, fake snow and fairy lights forsaken in favour of evergreen, hung in such abundance around the walls and mantelpieces that the rooms were half-forested. Clem, whose youth had outrun the toll of years for so long, was not such a healthy sight. Five months before he’d looked a fleshy thirty in a flattering light. Now he looked ten years older at least, his bright welcome and flattery unable to conceal his fatigue.

‘You wore green,’ he said as he escorted her into the lounge. ‘I told Taylor you’d do that. Green eyes, green dress.’

‘Do you approve?’

‘Of course! We’re having a pagan Christmas this year. Dies Natalis Solis Invictus.’ ‘What’s that?’

‘The Birth of the Unconquered Sun,’ he said. The Light of the World. We need a little of that right now.’

‘Do I know many people here?’ she said, before they stepped into the hub of the party.

‘Everybody knows you, darling,’ he said fondly. ‘Even the people who’ve never met you.’

There were many faces she knew awaiting them, and it took her five minutes to get across to where Taylor was sitting, lord of all he surveyed, in a well-cushioned chair close to the roaring fire. She tried not to register the shock she felt at the sight of him. He’d lost almost all of what had once been a leonine head of hair, and every spare ounce of substance from the face beneath. His eyes, which had always been his most penetrating feature (one of the many things they’d had in common), seemed enormous now, as though to devour in the time he had left the sights his demise would deny him. He opened his arms to her.

‘Oh, my sweet,’ he said. ‘Give me a hug. Excuse me if I don’t get up.’

She bent and hugged him. He was skin and bone; and cold, despite the fire close by.

‘Has Clem got you some punch?’ he asked.

‘I’m on my way,’ Clem said.

‘Get me another vodka while you’re at it,’ Taylor said, imperious as ever.

‘I thought we’d agreed-’ Clem said.

‘I know it’s bad for me. But staying sober’s worse.’

‘It’s your funeral,’ Clem said, with a bluntness Jude found shocking. But he and Taylor eyed each other with a kind of adoring ferocity, and she saw in the look how Clem’s cruelty was part of their mechanism for dealing with this tragedy.

‘You wish,’ Taylor said. ‘I’ll have an orange juice. No, make that a Virgin Mary. Let’s be seasonal about it.’

‘I thought you were having a pagan celebration,’ Jude said as Clem headed away to fetch the drinks.

‘I don’t see why the Christians should have the Holy Mother,’ Taylor said. They don’t know what to do with her when they’ve got her. Pull up a chair, sweetie. I heard a rumour you were in foreign dimes.’

‘I was. But I came back at the last minute. I had some problems in New York.’

‘Whose heart did you break this time?’

‘It wasn’t that kind of problem.’

‘Well?’ he said. ‘Be a telltale. Tell Taylor.’

This was a bad joke from way back, and it brought a smile to Judith’s lips. It also brought the story, which she’d come here swearing she’d keep to herself.

‘Somebody tried to murder me,’ she said.

‘You’re jesting,’ he replied.

‘I wish I was.’

‘What happened?’ he said. ‘Spill the beans. I like hearing other people’s bad news just at the moment. The worse, the better.’

She slid her palm over Taylor’s bony hand. ‘Tell me how you are first.’

‘Grotesque,’ he said. ‘Clem’s wonderful, of course, but all the tender loving care in the world won’t make me healthy. I have bad days and good days. Mostly bad lately. I am, as my ma used to say, not long for this world.’ He glanced up. ‘Look out, here comes Saint Clemence of the Bed Pan. Change the subject. Clem, did Judy tell you somebody tried to kill her?’

‘No. Where was this?’

‘In Manhattan?’

‘A mugger?’

‘No.’

‘Not someone you knew?’ Taylor said.

Now she was on the point of telling the whole thing, and she wasn’t sure she wanted to. But Taylor had an anticipatory gleam in his eye, and she couldn’t bear to disappoint him. She began, her account punctuated by exclamations of delighted incredulity from Taylor, and she found herself rising to her audience as though this story were not the grim truth but a preposterous fiction. Only once did she lose her momentum, when she mentioned Gentle’s name, and Clem broke in to say that he’d been invited tonight. Her heart tripped, and took a beat to get back into its rhythm.

Tell the rest,’ Taylor was exhorting her. ‘What happened?’

She went on with her story, but now, with her back to the door, she found herself wondering every moment if he was stepping through it. Her distraction took its toll on the narrative. But then perhaps a tale about murder told by the prey was bound to predictability. She wrapped it up with undue haste.

The point is, I’m alive,’ she said.

‘I’ll drink to that,’ Taylor replied, passing his unsipped Virgin Mary back to Clem. ‘Maybe just a splash of vodka?’ he pleaded. ‘I’ll take the consequences.’

Clem gave a reluctant shrug, and claiming Jude’s empty glass, wended his way back through the crowd to the drinks table, giving Jude an excuse for turning round and scanning the room. Half a dozen new faces had appeared since she’d sat down. Gentle was not amongst them.

‘Looking for Mister Right?’ Taylor said. ‘He’s not here yet.’

She looked back to meet his amusement.

‘I don’t know who you’re talking about,’ she said.

‘Mr Zacharias.’

‘What’s so funny?’

‘You and him. The most talked-about affair of the last decade. You know, when you mention him, your voice changes. It gets - ‘

‘Venomous.’

‘Breathy. Yearning.’

‘I don’t yearn for Gentle.’

‘My mistake,’ he said archly. ‘Was he good in bed?’ ‘I’ve had better.’

‘You want to know something I never told anybody?’ He leaned forward, the smile becoming more pained. She thought it was his aching body that brought the frown to his brow, until she heard his words. ‘I was in love with Gentle from the moment I met him. I tried everything to get him into bed. Got him drunk. Got him high. Nothing worked. But I kept at him, and about six years ago - ‘

Clem appeared at this juncture, supplying Taylor and Jude with replenished glasses before heading off to welcome a fresh influx of guests.