Peter Handke - The Ride Across Lake Constance and Other Plays

GEORGE

( Takes a step toward JANNINGS and collapses. As he slowly rises again ) My foot has fallen asleep.

JANNINGS

( Reaches for the cigar box. He lifts it but cannot hold on to it so that it falls to the floor .) So has my hand. (GEORGE carefully walks up to JANNINGS, stops next to him. Both of them glance at each other for the first time, then look away again. GEORGE leans against the edge of the table, now sits down on it. The cigar box is lying on the floor between them. Both look at it . JANNINGS turns his head toward GEORGE. GEORGE slides of the table . JANNINGS points at the cigar box. GEORGE misunderstands the gesture and looks as if there was something to see on the box . JANNINGS agrees to the misunderstanding and now points as if he really wanted to point out something .) That blue sky you see on the label, my dear fellow, it really exists there.

GEORGE

( Bends down to the cigar box, takes it, looks at it .) You’re right! ( He puts the box back on the floor and straightens up .)

JANNINGS

You’re standing …

GEORGE

( Interrupts him .) I can also sit down. ( He sits down in the fauteuil with the smaller footstool and makes himself comfortable .) What did you want to say?

JANNINGS

“You’re standing just now: would you be kind enough to hand me the cigar box from the floor?”

( Pause .)

GEORGE

You were dreaming?

JANNINGS

When the nights were especially long, in winter.

GEORGE

You must be dreaming.

JANNINGS

Once, on a winter evening, I was sitting with someone in a restaurant. As I said, it was evening, we sat by the window and were talking about a corpse; about a suicide who had leaped into the river. Outside, it rained. We held the menus in our hands. “Don’t look to the right!” (GEORGE quickly looks to the left, then to the right .) shouted the person opposite me. I looked to the right: but there was no corpse. Besides, my friend had meant I should not look on the right page of the menu because that was where the prices were marked. ( Pause .) How do you like the story?

GEORGE

So it was only a story?

( Pause .)

JANNINGS

When one tells it, it seems like that to oneself.

GEORGE

Like a story? (JANNINGS nods. Pause. Then he slowly shakes his hedd .) So you’re wrong after all. Then it’s true what you told me?

JANNINGS

I’m just wondering.

( Pause .)

GEORGE

And how did it go on?

JANNINGS

We ordered kidneys flambé.

GEORGE

And you got them?

JANNINGS

Of course.

GEORGE

And asked for the check and got it?

JANNINGS

Naturally.

GEORGE

And asked for the coats and got them?

JANNINGS

Why the coats?

GEORGE

Because it was a winter evening.

JANNINGS

( Relieved ) Of course.

GEORGE

And then?

JANNINGS

We went home.

( Both laugh with relief. Pause .)

GEORGE

Only one thing I don’t understand. Of what significance is the winter evening to the story? There was no need to mention it, was there? (JANNINGS closes his eyes and thinks .) Are you asleep?

JANNINGS

( Opens his eyes .) Yes, that was it! You asked me whether I was dreaming and I told you how long I sleep during winter nights and that I then begin to dream toward morning, and as an example I wanted to tell you a dream that might occur during a winter night.

GEORGE

Might occur?

JANNINGS

I invented the dream. As I said, it was only an example. The sort of thing that goes through one’s head … As I said — a story …

GEORGE

But the kidneys flambé?

JANNINGS

Have you ever had kidneys flambé?

GEORGE

No. Not that I know.

JANNINGS

If you don’t know, then you haven’t had them.

GEORGE

No.

JANNINGS

You’re disagreeing with me?

GEORGE

Yes, that is: no. That is: yes, I agree with you.

JANNINGS

In other words, when you mention kidneys flambé, you talk about something you know nothing about.

GEORGE

That’s what I wanted to say.

JANNINGS

And about something one doesn’t know, one shouldn’t talk, isn’t that so?

GEORGE

Indeed.

(JANNING makes the appropriate gesture with his hand, turning up his palm in the process. GEORGE stares at it, and under the impression that GEORGE has found something on the palm JANNINGS leaves it like that. The hand now looks as if it is waiting for something; say, for the cigar box. After what has been said just now the hand has the effect of an invitation, so that GEORGE bends down and puts the box in JANNINGS ’ s hand .

A brief pause, as if JANNINGS had expected something else. Then he takes the box with his other hand and puts it on his knee. He looks at his hand, which is still extended .)

JANNINGS

That’s not what I meant to say with that. It just seemed to me that you had noticed something on my hand. ( He opens the box top with his other hand and offers the box to GEORGE, who looks inside .) Take one.

(GEORGE quickly takes a cigar . JANNINGS takes one too. GEORGE takes the box from JANNINGS and puts it back on the table. Each lights his own cigar. Both lean back and smoke .)

GEORGE

Haven’t you noticed anything?

JANNINGS

Speak. ( Pause .) Please, go ahead and speak.

GEORGE

Didn’t you notice how silly everything suddenly became when we began to talk about kidneys flambé? No, not so much suddenly as gradually, the more often we mentioned the kidneys flambé. Kidneys flambé, kidneys flambé, kidneys flambé! And didn’t it strike you why the kidneys flambé gradually made everything so hair-raisingly silly?

( Pause .)

JANNINGS

Speak.

GEORGE

Because we spoke about something that wasn’t visible at the time. Because we mentioned something that wasn’t there at the time! And do you know how I happened to notice this?

( Pause .)

JANNINGS

Speak.

GEORGE

When you made that motion with your hand two minutes ago—

JANNINGS

( Interrupts him .) Two minutes have passed since then?

GEORGE

It may also have been earlier. In any case — what was I about to say?

JANNINGS

When I made that motion with my hand …

GEORGE

When you made that motion with your hand, I suddenly noticed the rings on your fingers and thought to myself: ah, rings! Look at that, rings! Indeed: rings! And then I saw the rings again, and when what I thought and what I saw coincided so magically, I was so happy for a moment that I couldn’t help but put the cigar box in your hand. And only then I noticed how ridiculous I had seemed to myself speaking all that time about kidneys flambé! I wasn’t even myself any more, my hairs rose on end when I spoke about them. And only when I saw the rings and thought: ah, the rings! and then cast a second glance at the rings, then it seemed to me that I was no longer confused.

JANNINGS

And I felt you were handing me the box voluntarily.

GEORGE

Do you understand me?

JANNINGS

From a human point of view, yes.

GEORGE

Take a look around. ( They take a look around the room .) Car. ( They hesitate a little, continue looking around the room .) Cattle prod. ( They hesitate, continue looking around the room .) Bloodhounds. ( They look around the room, hesitate .) Swollen bellies. ( Only JANNINGS looks around the room, hesitates. ) Trigger button.