Dennis Lehane - Coronado

WILL Breast.

GINA Chin.

WILL Sorry.

GINA Men. I thought, “Oh God, it all makes sense now. I can breathe. I can live. I’m, I’m home.”

WILL Home.

GINA I’m home, Will.

WILL Let’s kill him.

GINA Let’s kill him.

WILL Yeah.

GINA Who?

WILL Who.

GINA My husband?

WILL Yes.

GINA Okay.

WILL No, no really.

GINA No, no really.

Another booth. The DOCTOR, a psychiatrist, is meeting with his PATIENT, a woman.

PATIENT So, okay, we’re here.

DOCTOR We’re here. At your insistence.

PATIENT No, no. Yours.

DOCTOR You asked to meet. I suggested a public place.

PATIENT A bar. This bar.

DOCTOR A public place.

PATIENT With liquor.

DOCTOR As opposed to a Wal-Mart?

PATIENT As opposed to a Starbucks.

DOCTOR I don’t drink coffee.

PATIENT Maybe you should take it up.

DOCTOR I like tea. It’s better for you.

PATIENT And yet we’re here. So’s it safe to say you like liquor more than tea?

[ DOCTOR stands. PATIENT is oblivious. ]

PATIENT Can we assume that?

DOCTOR I’m going.

[ PATIENT notices him standing. ]

PATIENT Doctor, please.

DOCTOR This was a bad idea.

PATIENT Please.

[ DOCTOR places some money on the table. ]

DOCTOR A terrible idea.

PATIENT Just listen.

DOCTOR There’s enough there to pay for the drinks.

PATIENT Just please listen.

DOCTOR It was unprofessional of me. A bad, bad idea.

PATIENT I keep…

DOCTOR Please don’t drink too much—

PATIENT I can’t…

DOCTOR — if you drove.

PATIENT I used to…

DOCTOR Even if you didn’t.

PATIENT I used to remember things.

DOCTOR There’s a cabstand not too far. In front of that motel.

PATIENT I forget birthdays I had. Parts of high school, college, my twenties, last year.

DOCTOR Because you drink.

PATIENT You’re the one who wanted to meet here!

DOCTOR And why? Why do you think that is?

PATIENT Because you’re projecting?

DOCTOR Nice try.

PATIENT I thought you were leaving.

[ He starts to walk. ]

PATIENT I know where you live.

DOCTOR [ Stops, looks back. ] I moved.

PATIENT Two-twenty-four Stellar Lakes Lane.

[ Beat. ]

Oh, I’m sorry — another round?

[ He slides into the booth. ]

Another booth. BOBBY and BOBBY’S FATHER.

BOBBY’S FATHER So how was she?

BOBBY I sent her home.

BOBBY’S FATHER Before or after?

BOBBY During.

BOBBY’S FATHER How do you send a whore home during?

BOBBY She kept interrupting the blow job to pontificate on the merits of Michael Bay films.

BOBBY’S FATHER Who’s that?

BOBBY Movie director. Makes all those shitty movies like The Rock and Pearl Harbor and Bad Boys.

BOBBY’S FATHER I like those movies. They’ve got clarity.

BOBBY Clarity.

BOBBY’S FATHER

Yeah. No one’s all confused about how they feel or what they want or any of that whiny-ass bullshit. They want to fuck the blond chick, they feel like blowing shit up. It’s pure. So you sent her home.

BOBBY I gave her cab fare.

BOBBY’S FATHER She didn’t use it.

BOBBY Huh?

BOBBY’S FATHER She came over to my room.

BOBBY Your room.

BOBBY’S FATHER Somebody had to prop her ego up, poor girl like that.

[ They stare at each other. ]

BOBBY So what’d you do after?

BOBBY’S FATHER I rinsed my dick in the sink and drove her home.

BOBBY You drove her home.

BOBBY’S FATHER I’m speaking Czech?

BOBBY People do have a way of disappearing in your company, Daddy. You drove her home.

BOBBY’S FATHER I drove her home. Yes.

BOBBY Where’d she live?

BOBBY’S FATHER Home.

[ Beat. ]

So what was it like?

BOBBY You’ve never been?

BOBBY’S FATHER Been in county a couple times, but the big house? No, no, boy, not for your old man. So tell me, come on.

BOBBY It was like prison, Dad. The hard cons say you only do two days in prison. The day—

BOBBY’S FATHER That right?

BOBBY — you go in and the day you get out. I did the day they transferred me from the hospital ward and the day you picked me up in a stolen car with a hooker in the backseat.

BOBBY’S FATHER And a bottle of Beam, don’t forget.

BOBBY And a bottle of Beam, thank you.

BOBBY’S FATHER And some coke. That too.

BOBBY That too.

BOBBY’S FATHER So how’s the memory?

[ BOBBY laughs. ]

BOBBY’S FATHER What?

BOBBY “How’s the memory.” I took two bullets to the head, old man.

BOBBY’S FATHER I thought one glanced off.

BOBBY Two bullets hit your fucking head, you don’t get hung up on specifics.

BOBBY’S FATHER That how it works?

GINA and WILL stare at each other. Gina’s husband, HAL, approaches with a pitcher of beer in one hand, three shots in the other, and three beer glasses dangling from his fingers.

GINA [ Eyes still on WILL. ]

Hi, honey.

HAL Little help?

[ WILL helps him place the pitcher and glasses on the table. ]

WILL There you go, boss.

HAL Mighty white of you, I must say. Many times as I’ve been in here, you’d think I’d have some suck with the bartenders. Nope. I wait like everyone else.

GINA Lost in a sea of the great unwashed. Poor baby.

[ HAL sits beside her, begins pouring beers. ]

HAL It’s a trial. Lucky I’m such a sweetheart. So you took care of that Coronado thing?

WILL Wrapped it up this morning. Came back as soon as humanly possible.

HAL Now there’s a sense of industry. I’ll drink to that.

[ HAL and GINA and WILL throw back their shots. ]

HAL I always told you, honey. Didn’t I always say?

GINA You always said.

HAL In-dustrious. You okay?

GINA Fine.

HAL Sure?

GINA Really. Yeah. Just tired.

HAL Oh, I heard a good one today.

[ GINA lights a cigarette. ]

HAL Do you have to?

GINA Do you?

HAL Fair enough. You smoke your cancer stick, I’ll tell my joke. It’s just I love her so much, you know, boy?

WILL So the joke?

HAL Oh, right. I heard this from Frank. You know Frank, right?

WILL Frank in Shipping?

HAL No. That’s Frank Stebson. I’m talking about Frank in Accounts Receivable.

WILL No. I don’t know him.

HAL Frank. Frank. You know the guy. Frank Corso. Big whale. Works in Accounts Receivable.

WILL No.

HAL Sure you do. Always doing Saturday Night Live routines on Monday morning? Wears ties that play music? Frank. Funny as shit. He—

GINA Doesn’t seem he knows the man.

HAL You don’t?

WILL ’Fraid not.

HAL Frank. From… Well, anyway, there’s this guy who—

WILL Is this Frank?

HAL What? No. This is the joke.

WILL My apologies.

HAL

Okay. Well, there’s this old boy and he’s got a son, kid’s, you know, twenty-two or so, always loafing around the house. One day, the guy says to his son, “You need to get up on out this house and find yourself a wife cuz we about done feeding your ass.” So the kid comes back about a week later, finds his father in the basement, says, “Daddy, I found me a woman.” Father says, “Where she at, boy?” Son says, “Setting on the couch in the living room.” So the father, he takes a stroll up there, then comes running back down to the basement. He says, “Boy, you can’t marry that girl. She’s your sister, but your mama don’t know it.”