Richard Bandler - Reframing. Neuro–Linguistic Programming™ and the Transformation of Meaning

You first give him something to object to that isn't on the car anyway, like racing stripes. Then you go on to reframe the implication of the content. The fact that it's a fast sports car doesn't mean that it's frivolous; it means that it's safe.

Of course you first have to gather enough information to know that safety will appeal to this particular person. Safety doesn't mean a thing to some people. To do an effective content reframe you have to know at least a little bit about what criteria are important to the person that you're talking to. Then you take whatever elements he objects to, and find a way that those elements can satisfy other criteria that he has. You go for saving money, saving time, prestige, or whatever is important to this particular person.

If somebody says «It's too racy; I want something more conservative," then you go for redefining the car as being truly conservative: the safety, the speed, the good repair record all conserve your investment as well as your life.

If he agrees but says that other people won't realize it, you can reframe that. «Doing what you know is best is the earmark of a true conservative. It's really conservative to be willing to drive a car like this even though other people don't know that you're being conservative.» With your emphasis and tonal shifts you imply that it is a question of appearance in contrast to the car's real function.

You can also utilize his concern about appearances and what other people think. You can use this concern to propel him into going ahead and buying a car. «You know, a lot of people come in here and really don't care what other people think of them. They just decide what is appropriate for them and go ahead! Of course those are the people who are pleased with their decisions later.» Now he is in a dilemma, because he is faced with «what people think» on both sides of the argument. On one side some people may think it's too racy; on the other side you are saying «You're too concerned with what other people think of you.» So you utilize his concern about others' opinions to move him in the direction of deciding for himself.

One thing that all salespeople need is to be able to reframe objections about price. «Well, this car definitely costs a lot more than a Chevy Chevette or something similar. In fact, it's twice the price, but if you think about buying a car just in terms of the short run, then you are better off buying a more expensive car, because you can finance it over a longer period of time and keep your monthly payments down lower. You would actually be spending less money per month to drive a better car. It takes a lot longer to own it, but in the long run when you finally do own it, you end up owning something that you can still drive, instead of a pile of junk that has no equity.»

I typically look at the customer and say «Do you think all those doctors and lawyers drive cars like this just because they are ostentatious? They do it because they know about money. If you think it's cheaper to pay $220 a month for three years to buy a Datsun as opposed to $220 a month for five years to buy a BMW, look at a five–year–old Datsun and compare it with a five–year–old BMW. Check their value and the kind of shape they are in, and notice which one is still running. You will discover that it's really much too frivolous and expensive to go out and buy a cheap car. You can't afford to do it. While you may be saving a few dollars in down payment and perhaps a few dollars a month right now, three years later you're just going to have to buy another new car all over again.»

Five years from now the person who bought the expensive car will actually look at it and say «I've still got a car that's holding together. It runs well and it's still worth money.» Your job as a salesperson is to create that experience for the customer now, so that he can take that into consideration as he decides which car to buy.

The really critical element in doing successful reframing is to find out enough about a person's world–model so that you know what kind of reframe will fit for him. You can gather information directly, and you also need to listen very carefully to objections. Every objection will tell you about his important criteria. The more you know about his world–model, the more appropriately you can reframe. Simple information–gathering is where most salespeople fail miserably. Most salespeople are terrible at pacing, too. They tend to jump in with a standard sales pitch that may be completely inappropriate, instead of pacing and gathering information about this particular customer's criteria.

A lot of salespeople think they should try to sell everything to everybody. That is a situation in which they need to be reframed, because they need to understand that sometimes they make more money not selling something. When you find out that the product you have is really inappropriate for a particular customer, you're much better off not making a sale. If your product is as good as what somebody else has, or if there is no way of making the distinction, it doesn't matter. But if you really are convinced that something else would be better, then you're much better off if you convince the customer of that, so she can go somewhere else and be happy with her purchase.

If you sell someone something that doesn't fit her criteria, sooner or later she will have what salespeople call «buyer's remorse.» People tell their friends about unsatisfying purchases, and typically they blame it on the salesperson. That's the kind of advertising you don't need.

Satisfied customers also tell their friends, and satisfied customers aren't necessarily people to whom you actually sold something. If they were satisfied with the experience they had with you, they will send you their friends even if they themselves didn't buy anything.

I know a realtor who is very good at information–gathering. She is able to select the few houses that actually might appeal to a particular customer. If those aren't appropriate, she doesn't try to show them anything else. She just says «I know what you want. That's all there is right now that might interest you. I'll let you know when something else comes onto the market.» Almost all her sales are referrals from people to whom she didn't sell, but who liked the way she treated them.

There's a great little book about this, called Miracle on 34th Street. A guy is hired to play Santa Claus for a large New York department store. He starts sending parents to other stores whenever he knows they can get better deals on toys elsewhere. The store manager finds out about this, and is about to fire him. Just then a flood of people come into the store, because they've heard that this store has a Santa who won't just try to con them into buying junk. And of course they sell out the store completely. Most salespeople are shortsighted, and never consider the long–term benefits of recognizing when there isn't a valid way to make a match between product and buyer.

The problem that reframing addresses is the way that people generalize. Some people don't ever consider that they will be in the same Position three years from now if they buy a car that won't last. Or they buy a used car because it's cheaper, and they don't think about things like not being able to depend on it, having to rent a car while it's being fixed, and so on. When they are buying a car and they look at prices, they see the difference in total price, but they don't ask the question «When?» Something that's cheaper now may be much more expensive in the long run.

This is exactly the same situation as the father who says to his daughter «Don't ever be stubborn," rather than realizing «She's hard to control, and it's a bother; I want to find a way around it, but this same behavior is going to pay off for me in other situations later on.» There's no utilization in the process by which most people generalize. Refram–ing is saying «You can look at it that way, or you can look at it this way, or you can look at it this other way. The meaning that you attach is not the 'real' meaning. All of these meanings are well–formed within your way of understanding the world.»