Jennifer Crusie - GETTING RID OF BRADLEY

Anthony shoved the report out of the way and went back to typing. “So we have nothing.”

“Not exactly. We have Lucy.” Zack sat on the edge of his desk. “And Lucy’s house, which we’re going to have to search now that we can’t find Bradley the rat. I need to talk to Lucy again anyway.”

“Is this an instinct?” Anthony hit the return carriage.

“Oh, yeah. Definitely. I have a real instinct about Lucy Savage.”

“So now the only question is, What kind of instinct?” Anthony grinned while he typed.

“What? Oh, no. Not a chance. I can’t even imagine her naked.”

“What?” Anthony stopped typing and started to laugh. “I don’t believe it. You were the one who once described Queen Elizabeth naked.”

“That was in college.”

“Yeah, but I’ve never forgotten it” Anthony shook his head. “So now you’ve lost the ability to imagine women naked? That’s a bad sign, Zack.”

“I haven’t lost anything,” Zack snapped. “And it’s just with Lucy. It’s her fault. She’s just not that kind of woman.”

“And Queen Elizabeth is? I don’t think so. I think you’re attracted to her. You respect her. This could be it Love. Marriage.” Anthony paused. “Maturity.”

“Don’t be juvenile. Did you try those phone numbers that Elmore gave you for Porter? The motel in Kentucky and the one for the place where he’s been staying here in town?”

“Just a couple of minutes ago. He has a room in Kentucky, but he’s not answering. The one here is a hotel in Overlook. The room is rented to a guy named John Beulah. And the phone is busy.”

Zack frowned. “What would Bradley Porter be doing registered under an assumed name in a hotel in Overlook?”

“Saving money? It’s definitely the lowest of the low-rent districts.”

“Well, then, that’s our next move.” Zack stood. “Let’s check out the hotel right away before whoever it is gets off the phone. I love Overlook. It always makes me feel like a real cop- paranoid.”

“I have to finish this first.” Anthony frowned as he typed. “It’s almost done. Patience.”

“And after the hotel, we can hit Lucy’s place,” Zack said. “I think we’re making progress.” He started to pace. “Could you hurry up? We’ve got things to do here. I want to get to Lucy’s before lunch.”

“Just a minute. Just one minute. Amuse yourself.” Anthony’s phone rang and he answered, “Taylor, Property Crimes.” Then he looked grim, and said, “Right away,” and hung up. “We have a gunshot victim. Female.”

Zack’s heart stopped for a moment. “Not Lucy. Tell me I didn’t leave her alone for some creep to-”

“Not Lucy. Not unless she went blonde again and checked into a hotel in Overlook.”

Zack shook his head, relieved. “No. Not a chance. The dogs wouldn’t like Overlook.” Then he stopped. “Overlook? It can’t be.”

Anthony nodded. “Same room number as our rat Bradley. After I called, the desk clerk went up to check and found her unconscious, still clutching the phone. He called the rescue squad, and she’s on her way to Emergency now.”

“I’ll be damned. He’s shacked up with the blonde in the slums, and then he shoots her and leaves for Kentucky? This makes no sense. Wait. How did they know this was our problem?”

“Because they found your name and phone number on a paper in her purse. Detective Warren. Property Crimes. And you’ll love this part…”

“Come on, come on.”

“Shot with a.38.”

Zack smacked his hand on the desk. “She’s our phone tip. John Bradley found out, shot at us on the street, and then went back and shot her. So where is Bradley Porter in this? This makes no sense, but at least it’s a connection between Bradley Porter and crime. Let’s go.”

“What about Lucy? Aren’t you going to call her?”

“And tell her what?” Zack grabbed his jacket. “She’ll keep. Let’s go .”

“What did you do, hypnotize this woman?” Anthony said, but he picked up his jacket and followed him out the door.

IT WAS EARLY AFTERNOON when Lucy’s phone finally rang.

“Hello?” she answered, trying to sound nonchalant.

“You didn’t call me last night,” Tina said. “I got your message on the machine and called you back, but all I got was a busy signal. What happened?”

“I forgot,” Lucy said, trying not to feel disappointed. She curled up in her blue overstuffed chair. “And the busy signal was Einstein. He knocked the phone table over.”

“Why you don’t have everything bolted to the floor in that place is beyond me. If you must live with a herd of animals, you should be prepared. Anyway, tell me about the mugger. You really beat one up? That’s terrific!”

“Well, sort of.”

“You only ‘sort of beat him up?”

“No, it’s only sort of terrific. I really beat him up. His lip looked awful. Of course, he keeps swearing that I didn’t beat him up-”

“You talked to this creep? That means the police got him. Good!”

“Well, in a manner of speaking. I sent some policemen after him, but I didn’t realize what had happened until he showed up at my door-”

“Who?” Tina asked, confused.

“Zack. He…”

“Who’s Zack?”

“The guy in the alley,” Lucy said, and Tina groaned.

“And now you’re on a first-name basis with him and you won’t press charges because he’s told you about his horrible childhood in reform school. Lucy, you are too damn nice!”

“Not exactly-”

“Forget it. I’m coming over, and we’re going to the police and get this Zack character sent up the river for life. I know a cop now. That suit in the diner yesterday turned out to have a badge. You stay there. I’ll call him and Benton.”

Lucy sat up straighter and clutched the phone. “No, Tina-”

“Do you think the police will be able to find him?”

“Probably. He works for them.”

There was a short silence. “What?” Tina said finally.

“He’s a cop,” Lucy said.

“You beat up a cop?”

“That depends on who you talk to. From my point of view, yes. From Zack’s, no.”

“Zack.”

“Zack Warren. Detective Zachary Warren.” Lucy relaxed into her chair again. “He has blue eyes. You remember. He was the black leather in the restaurant yesterday.”

“Don’t do this,” Tina said.

“What?”

“We’ve got to talk. Meet me for lunch at the Maisonette.”

“I can’t. Zack told me not to leave.”

“What? He just told you…”

“He thinks somebody’s trying to kill me.”

There was another silence.

“Stay there,” Tina said finally. “I’m coming over with Chinese takeout, and you are going to tell me everything.”

“All right,” Lucy said. “But I better warn you. My hair is…different.”

“Different,” Tina said. “I can’t wait.”

“She’s unconscious.” Zack slumped, defeated, in a plastic chair outside the hospital-room door. “Of course, she’s unconscious. She’s been bleeding into the carpet for hours. No ID. Nothing. This is making me crazy.”

“You were already crazy.” Anthony checked his watch. “Come on, we have things to do. The desk clerk just identified John Bradley as the man who used the room. We have to get a picture of Bradley Porter to him, too.”

Zack stared into space. “Bradley. Rat Bradley. I wonder where he is now?”

“Well, not back at the hotel. Let’s go check out the room. Forensics hasn’t found anything so far, but maybe…”

“I really want to arrest him,” Zack said. “Attempted murder is as good a reason as any.”

“Better than most,” Anthony agreed. “Now move. We need to get started on this. It’s looking like it will take us the rest of the day and most of the night, as it is.”