Kim Karr - Torn

I turn toward him and give him a soft kiss. “I thought you were still sleeping.”

“No, I was just laying here thinking.”

“What about?”

His body covers mine and he props himself up on his hands, one on either side of my face. “Our life together. What it will be like.”

“What do you see for us?”

He collapses his full weight on me. “Besides this,” he says, kissing me, tugging on my lower lip before rolling to his side and draping his arm around me. Pulling me close, he grins. “I see us together, married. Having kids. Doing fun family things that our kids will never forget.”

I feel myself tremble as I imagine our perfect life—our children’s lives being complete unlike either of ours were as children. “How many kids do you want?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “As many or as few as you want.”

Smiling so hard, my face hurts; I run my fingers along his cheek. “Three, I think three. Yours is the perfect-sized family.”

Kissing my fingers he says, “Yeah, it is. Three is a good number.”

His eyes smile with that light I love and I ask, “What?”

He rubs his hand over my stomach. “I was just thinking about how beautiful you’re going to look pregnant.”

Tears of joy escape my eyes before I kiss him. Kiss him with love, with adoration, and a happiness that makes my stomach flutter.

He nestles his head on my shoulder and we lay quiet for a while, listening to the rain and just enjoying being together.

After a while River looks up at me. “I love you,” he whispers and his warm breath sends a shiver down my spine.

“Me, too.”

“You love yourself?”

“No silly, I love you.”

I feel his mouth against my neck. “Can we promise to always use words to tell each other how we feel?”

“Of course,” I say because I can promise him that. I want to spend my life with him. I love him more than words can ever express.

Reaching his hand down between my legs, he smirks and coyly says, “I’ll take ‘of course’ as a green light in any conversation we have from now on.”

Giggling because it wasn’t long ago that he said “of course” couldn’t be assumed in any conversation and now he’s laughing about it, I hop off the bed and go find my jeans. Reaching into my pocket I pull the guitar pick out and close it in my hand. Back in bed next to him, he just looks at me skeptically. Opening my palm I show him the pick that reads, “I love you.”

Eyeing the pick he says, “I knew which one was missing immediately and I want that back, you know.” Then he gently lifts my hand and kisses it and the pick together. “I love you, too.”

God, I love everything about him and I don’t want to wait another day to be his wife and have his babies. I prop my elbow on the pillow and rest my chin on my hand. Pressing into him so that our bodies are melded together I ask, “River Wilde, will you marry me?”

“You can’t ask me that, I’ve already asked you that question.” His hand moves to my backside and pushes me further into him—solidifying us as a single unit.

“No, I mean marry me tomorrow. We can go home, grab a bag, and head to Vegas.”

His hand slides down my thigh. “I don’t know. My proposal was much more romantic. I’m the kind of guy who likes to be wined and dined, and, besides, I’m not sure we can hop a flight to Vegas naked.”

Hiding my smile I tell him, “Alright Loverboy, no making fun of my proposal. It was impromptu.”

He grabs my left hand, lifts it to his mouth, and kisses my ring. “I would love to marry you, Dahlia London. Tomorrow can’t come soon enough.”

I smile widely and lean in to kiss him.

He pulls away, and draws an x over his heart. “And I promise you’ll never regret marrying me.”

His words sear me, branding me to the core. I know I will never regret one single second with him and suddenly I know what I have to do. I quickly stand and he sits up, staring at me in confusion. I walk over to the room-service tray, grab a butter knife, and return to the bed. Sitting in front of him, I hand him the knife and offer my wrist. He looks at me as if questioning what I’m asking him to do.

I nod my head. “I don’t have to wear a no-regrets bracelet because I know I will never regret a single moment of my life with you.”

He swallows and then loosens two of the screws on my bracelet. He stares intently at me as he removes the last thing connecting me to Ben. I’m now completely his, not that I haven’t been since the day we met, but somehow this cements it.

He touches his forehead to mine and whispers, “Thank you.”

I lean back and clutch his face in my hands. My eyes meet his and there are no words to describe the look on his face right now.

He pushes aside a piece of my hair and tucks it behind my ear. Slowly kissing his way down my neck he tells me, “I want you forever.”

I whisper back, “God, I love you so much.”

His lips lift into a smirk. “Good, because now that we’ve both professed our undying love for each other, can I touch you everywhere?”

All or Nothing

“Amazing Grace” starts ringing from the floor where River had tossed our phones. They rang on and off all day, but neither one of us paid attention to them. We needed time together, alone, to just shut out the world.

Looking sleepy-eyed at the clock, alarm overcomes me. It’s only 4:23 a.m., why would Grace be calling so early?

Jumping out of bed, I look for the illuminated phone on the carpet; the phone stops ringing before I get to it, but starts again immediately. I hit the ANSWER button.

“Hello?”

“Dahl, I’m sorry to call you like this,” he says and I tense at his wistful tone, anger surging through me. How dare he use Grace’s phone to call me.

“Ben, I don’t want to talk to you. Don’t ever call me again.” I seethe and move to hit the END button.

“It’s Grace,” he manages before I actually hang up.

My pulse races as I stagger to the bed.

River sits up. “Give me the phone. I’ll take care of it.”

I shake my head no and hold up one finger.

“Ben, what about her?”

Ben is quiet for the longest time.

River’s mouth tightens and he tries to grab the phone from me, but I turn away.

“Ben, tell me what’s wrong.”

River reaches to turn the light on and wraps a blanket around me.

“Dahl, she’s in the hospital.”

My eyes fill with tears. “Hospital? What happened?”

“It’s bad, Dahl. I’d rather tell you when you get here.”

Seeing my pain, River senses the urgency. He stands up and pulls his boxers and jeans on.

“No, tell me now.”

“We rushed her to the ER last night. She had a massive stroke.”

“A stroke? What does ‘massive’ mean?” I am trembling as I reel from the news and try to understand what it means.

River is on the hotel phone calling the valet.

Ben is crying. “She’s unresponsive. Her brain is hemorrhaging. I think you should come now.”

“She’s going to be alright, isn’t she?”

“Just come now. We’re at Mission,” he says and then hangs up.

I can feel my face go slack, my mouth dropping open slightly, and all I can do is stare wide-eyed at River. He’s looking over at me with concern. I open my mouth to speak, to reassure him, but snap it shut and gulp. Finally I manage, in a raspy, barely audible tone, “We have to get to the hospital in Laguna as soon as possible. It’s Grace.”

He squeezes me against his chest and I allow myself a minute to lean into him. His fingers find my chin and lift it up. “I’ll be with you every minute. Okay?”

I nod. I blink. I’ve been broken and glued back together so many times already—not again. Please not again. I rest my face against his chest and cry out, “Please let Grace be alright.”