E. Blair - Falling

She keeps a serious face when she says, “That actually sounds nice.”

“Yeah, it is,” I agree. “It’s not too often that everyone can get together, so when it does happen, it’s fun. Crazy, but fun.”

“What can I get you guys this morning?” the waiter asks when he drops by again.

“Um, I’ll have the two blueberry pancakes,” she tells him as she hands him the menu, and then I place my order.

She takes a sip of her tea and then asks, “So how many nieces and nephews do you have?”

Setting down my coffee, I say, “Three nieces and four nephews all under the age of five.” I smile when I add, “I’m not lying when I say it’s loud and crazy.”

When she doesn’t say anything in response, I ask, “So, you’re an only child?”

“Yeah. I have a pretty small family. My grandparents on my father’s side died when I was in high school, and I have never met my mother’s parents or her sister. My father is an only child as well, so it’s just the three of us.”

“Quiet.”

“Hmmm . . .” is all she replies before switching the topic back to me. “Is your mother out with the crazy Black Friday crowd today?”

“God, you have no idea. She and my aunts go bat-shit over the sales.”

When the waiter stops by and drops off our food, Candace lets out a satisfied sigh that I find humorous as she inspects her pancakes. She picks up her fork, and she must be hungry by the look on her face.

“That’s a shitload of food. You gonna be able to eat all that?” I ask.

Eying me, she cuts a huge piece off and for such a sophisticated looking girl, she shoves it in her mouth, giving me a gratified nod, and I literally laugh out loud at the scene she’s putting on.

“So, is all of your family in Oregon?” she asks while she eats.

“Yeah. I grew up there.”

“Why didn’t you ever go back after you graduated?”

“Because I bought out the bar. It was too good an opportunity to pass up. But honestly, Cannon Beach is a small town. I love Seattle and had already been here for four years and felt pretty settled. So I stayed,” I explain. “My mom had a hard time though. She had hoped that I would eventually move back, but it’s been ten years since I’ve been here, so she’s accepted that this is my home.”

“You two sound close,” she says before taking another bite.

“Yeah,” is all I respond when I take a sip of my coffee and continue to eat.

When Candace tosses down her fork and leans back, almost painfully, in her seat, she closes her eyes and lets out a groan that I laugh at.

“I can’t believe you ate all that. You sound like you’re about to die,” I tease.

“You have no idea,” she says as she opens her eyes.

“You gonna be able to walk, or will I have to carry you?”

Shifting around in her seat, she tells me, “Honestly, I really need to walk this off.”

“Come on, let’s get outta here,” I say as I stand up, not wanting to become a victim of a missed opportunity. I toss some cash onto the table and reach my hand out for her to take, and she does.

Walking her out into the rain, I nod my head over to where I’m parked for her to follow.

She stops in her steps and asks, “What?”

“I know you don’t have shit to do today, so come on,” I say as I walk over to my Rubicon. When I look back at her, she’s still standing there. “Come on,” I repeat.

“Where are we going?”

“I’ll figure that shit out when you get in.”

Wanting to keep Candace around for most of the day, I took her to the aquarium. I knew we could easily burn a few hours there, and I was right. She seemed relaxed and had fun, but now I’m sensing tension from her. We just left her house after grabbing a few groceries from the store. I could tell she was uncomfortable with me being there.

As I’m driving her back to her car that’s still at the restaurant, she watches the rain out the window and quietly says, “Thanks.”

“For what?”

“Today. I had fun hanging out,” she responds as she looks over at me.

“You should say yes when I ask you to go running with me tomorrow morning.”

“Is that you asking me or telling me?”

When I look over at her and give her a smirk, she starts to giggle as she says, “Okay then.”

Satisfied with her answer, I repeat her words, “Okay then.”

Feeling a little more comfortable talking with her after spending the day together, I decide to ask her about what happened with her parents. So when I turn into the parking lot, I put the jeep in park and sit for a moment. The rain is coming down hard, beating against the steel. Turning to face her, she looks at me when I say, “I didn’t want to say anything earlier, but I can’t help but wonder about what made you come home yesterday.”

She shifts to face me and lets out a sigh, leaning her head against the headrest. “I got into a fight with my parents. Some pretty nasty things were said, so I just left.”

“You guys fight a lot?”

“My whole life,” she tells me. “My mother is a difficult woman to be around. She doesn’t approve of the way I want to live.”

“What do you mean?” I can’t imagine what this girl could possibly be doing wrong to earn her parents’ disapproval.

“My parents are more concerned about their social standing than my happiness. So, having a daughter who wants to be a dancer and isn’t engaged to be married is not a good look for them.”

“That’s pretty shitty.”

“I’m used to it,” she mumbles, and I hate the fact that this has been going on so long that she expects it.

“No one should be used to that,” I tell her softly. “They should be proud of you. I’ve only just met you, but you’re pretty great from what I know so far.”

She fidgets with her hands, seeming uncomfortable with my words, but I needed to say them.

She keeps her focus on her hands when she speaks again. “I had always hoped that somewhere beneath their hard exterior that they would be proud of me, but after last night, I now know that they aren’t.” When she looks back up at me, she looks abashed as she tells me, “My mother actually said she was embarrassed by me.”

Jase was right; her parents are pieces of shit. I can’t even help myself when I lean into her, and slide my hand over hers. I want to do so much more, but I leave it at this. She stares at our hands, and I can sense her tensing up at the contact.

She sits up and pulls her hand out from under mine—flustered—she grabs for the door handle, but it’s locked. I hit the switch when I see her panic.

“Thanks,” she whispers before abruptly getting out of my car.

I watch her and wonder what’s causing her to flip moods in a mere instant. Fumbling with her keys, she finally gets in the car and starts it up. She quickly glances over at me, embarrassed, and I hate that. All I can manage to make sense of is that her parents have fucked with her head so much that she’s become removed from feeling emotions. I get it. That’s been me my whole life, but now, with her, I find myself wanting to feel instead of running away from it.

I was nervous about meeting up with Candace this morning to go running. I was a little unsure of how she would react to me after what happened yesterday in my car, but she didn’t seemed fazed by it, so I moved past it, and we spent a good hour running around campus and her neighborhood. She kept up with my pace, and I really enjoyed working out with her. I don’t even think she noticed how distracted I was though, trying to sneak a peek at her whenever I could. She’s small but there’s no doubt that this chick is in extreme shape. Her legs are insane, and in her tight running pants, I couldn’t keep my eyes off of her.