Robin Alexander - Pitifully Ugly

Hailey looked in my direction.

A little while later, I opened my door to Kalen, who stalked

past me. “I picked a shitty day for a walk.” Kalen started to strip

away her wet things in the middle of my living room. “Do you

have some sweats I can borrow? I’m soaked to the bone,” she said

through chattering teeth.

“Take a shower and thaw out.” I pushed her toward the

bathroom. “You didn’t walk al the way from your house, did you?”

“I had Todd drop me off a few blocks from here.” Kalen pulled

off her shirt, revealing a slight pooch in her belly. “It started to

rain on the last block.”

I reached over and patted her stomach. “Is this the baby

showing already?”

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“No, that’s fat,” Kalen said with a sob. “I’m gaining weight so

fast, but I can’t stop eating.” She grabbed me by the shoulders with

tears on her cheeks. “Let’s eat pizza. Todd has been following me

around with fruits and vegetables. If I’m going to puff up, I want

to at least enjoy what I’m eating.”

“I’ll order it right after I find you something to wear.”

Kalen hugged me tightly and went back to tugging off her

wet clothes.

After I found something for her to put on and ordered the

pizza, I warmed some milk for hot chocolate. Kalen looked better

when she came out of the bathroom. We took a seat on the sofa,

and she told me about vacillating between wanting to throttle

Todd one minute and cuddle the next. “It’s like I have multiple

personalities. I think he’s afraid of me.”

I would’ve agreed with her if she didn’t look so serious.

Kalen rubbed her stomach. “Do you think I’ll be like this

through the whole pregnancy?”

“You’ll have to ask Mom about that. I have no clue.”

Kalen smiled at me. “I think you’d be so cute pregnant.”

“I do not.” I jumped up when my cell phone rang. “Pizza’s at

the gate, I’ll be right back.” I answered and told the delivery guy

that I’d be right down. I took the stairs instead of the elevator,

kidding myself that the exercise would combat the calories I was

about to inhale. I trotted through the courtyard and opened the

gate. A teenage boy balanced the pizza in one hand while he

petted Fuzzy. I looked up to see Hailey making her way slowly

toward us.

As I paid for the pizza, Fuzzy bumped my leg with her ball. “I

missed you,” I said in a whisper as I scratched her behind the ears.

Hailey held the gate open for me. “How are you?” she asked

when I moved past her.

I wanted to say empty and depressed, but I mustered a smile

and lied. “Fine and you?”

I watched with sadness as Hailey’s lips twitched. “I’m okay.”

Neither of us seemed to know what to say as we walked

toward the building. Fuzzy circled us as we went, sniffing the air

around the pizza box. “Does she like pizza, too?”

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Hailey shooed her away when she got too close. “She thinks

she does, though she’s never had it.” Hailey opened the door and

held it for me and Fuzzy. “Enjoy your dinner,” she said as she and

Fuzzy took the stairs.

When I entered my apartment, Kalen was standing in the

window with her arms folded across her chest. “She’s pretty.” She

walked over to the coffee table where I set the pizza and dove in

without waiting for a plate. “I met her in the courtyard earlier.”

“Yeah, she is,” I said quietly as I poured a couple of glasses

of tea.

Kalen had already polished off one piece and was going after

another when I slid a plate onto her lap. “You’re seeing her, aren’t

you?”

“No, she broke it off with me.” I met Kalen’s glance. “She was

upfront and said she didn’t want anything serious.”

Kalen bit into her pizza, watching me. “This is why you’ve

been hiding yourself away lately,” she said after she chewed.

“I’ve had a lot of work to catch up on. Atlanta put me behind.”

After one slice, I was full. I put my plate on the coffee table and

sipped my tea. Kalen dipped into the box for another piece.

“You can’t give up, Shannon, just because this didn’t work

out. There are still a lot of nice women out there.”

“I know, but right now, I’m not interested.” I toyed with the

string on my sweatpants, aware that Kalen had stopped eating

and turned her full attention on me. “I can’t go out with someone

else while I’m thinking about her.”

“She watched you the whole time you were paying the pizza

guy.”“That’s not helping.” I tossed my napkin onto the table. “I think

she wants to be with me, but she’s as scared of me as I am of her.”

“You know the saying, ‘once a cheater always a cheater.’ You

have to let her go.”

I wanted to argue the point. Dad would’ve been the example,

but that would’ve devastated Kalen even after all these years.

“You don’t think there are people that realize the terrible mistake

they’ve made and resolve never to do it again?”

“Not from what I’ve seen. Remember Meredith’s husband?

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She’s caught him so many times that she’s just given up. The only

reason she stays is because of the kids. There’s not a day that I

don’t go to work and hear that someone’s husband was caught

running around.”

“I think Hailey’s case is different. She didn’t cheat because

she couldn’t keep it in her pants. She was coming to terms with

the fact that she’s gay.”

Kalen looked at me squarely. “That doesn’t give anyone the

license to cheat.”

I was growing weary of the conversation. “It doesn’t excuse

anything, but her reason sounds a hell of a lot better than just

some horny man or woman doing it for the thrill.”

Kalen pivoted and stretched her legs out on the sofa, making

it clear she didn’t have any plans to leave soon. “You only have

her word to go on. We don’t know anyone she knows, so we can’t

get another perspective.”

“Candace knew her cousin, but she left out the part that Jackie

had a temper that one day will land her in jail if it hasn’t already.”

I threw my legs out alongside hers. “There’s no need to discuss

this any further, anyway. She dumped me, remember?”

Kalen put her hands behind her head and grinned. “Okay,

next topic. What was it like kissing Angela?”

I know she saw my shocked expression before I could hide it.

“She told you.”

“Oh, yeah,” Kalen said with a note of satisfaction. “Are you

insane? She’s straight.”

“Well, that might be debatable because for a second, she

kissed me back.”

“Angela doesn’t strike me as the experimental type. You

must’ve been mistaken.” Kalen pinched at my arm with her toes.

“I didn’t mistake her tongue in my mouth,” I said, slapping

her away.

Kalen’s eyes went wide. “She didn’t!”

“Oh, yes, honey, she did.” Sometimes, Kalen was so easy.

“When she was telling you about the kiss, did she also mention

that she had my ass in both hands? Her breasts are so firm.” I held

up my hands. “They fit perfectly in these—”

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Pitifully Ugly

“You are such a liar,” Kalen shouted and dissolved into

laughter.

“Okay, yes, we didn’t grope each other, but she did slip me

the tongue.”