Nicole Edwards - Zane

“Tell me what you’re thinking right now,” he told her, not moving from where he stood just a couple of feet away from her.

“What I’m thinking?”

“Yes. Right this minute. What are you thinking?”

“I’m... I don’t know.”

“Yes, you do. Now tell me.” Zane wasn’t sure what was wrong with him or why he needed to get this out in the open right now, but for some reason this felt urgent. The need to get their feelings hashed out seemed startlingly important. As though they didn’t have enough time.

“I missed you,” she said.

“And?”

“And what? Isn’t that enough?” V started to turn away from him, but he reached out and grabbed her arm.

“What else? Tell me.”

“What about you?” V sounded defensive. “Why don’t you tell me what you’re thinking?”

“I love you.” The words sprang out without conscious thought. They were exactly what he’d been thinking, but maybe not right then. Those three words had been tumbling around on his tongue for quite some time now. He just hadn’t known he was going to say them to her. He felt them. Every single syllable was etched into his heart, echoed with each beat, but he had some self-preservation. Or so he thought.

“You do?”

That wasn’t what he expected from V. A denial, maybe. An argument, definitely. V was always trying to tell him what he was feeling and so far, she’d always been wrong. This had never been about sex with her. Not since that first night at Jaxson’s party. And not one single minute since. He loved her.

“I love you.” It was like all other words had vanished from his vocabulary. He only knew those three, and he would have to repeat them over and over until she believed him.

“I love you, too.”

Zane grabbed the counter. He hoped he was subtle, but he doubted it. Those words were like a sledgehammer to his heart, knocking the breath from his chest.

“You do?” Now it was his turn for confirmation.

“I do. I’m pretty sure I’ve loved you all along, but I didn’t want to believe it.” V took a step closer, and Zane wondered whether this was the same woman he’d gotten to know these last few months.

“But you believe it now?”

“I know it’s true, yes. I knew the minute I got to my mother’s house that I couldn’t run from you anymore. I couldn’t run from my feelings. But, it’s never been about that. I’ve never wanted to hurt you, Zane. I just want to protect you. I wasn’t able to protect you that day –”

V’s voice faltered, and Zane moved until he was holding her in his arms, his lips pressing against hers. “I’m the one who’s supposed to protect you.”

V pulled back, cupping his face and the smooth, gentle touch of her fingers made him want things he never thought he’d want. “Not true. I’m supposed to protect you just the same. I want to protect you.”

“The best way you can do that is to love me, V.” Zane knew that her love would be all he needed.

“I do love you. I can’t change that, but...”

Zane stopped her again. “No ‘buts’, V. Not this time. Love me. Just like I love you. It’s the only way I know how to go forward from here.” It was true. He was tired of moving backward or sideways. Even his anger for what had happened to him had been sidelined because this woman managed to fill him with so much more than the anger could ever offer. Loving her was the only thing that mattered.

“I love you,” V muttered, her lips pressing against his.

Zane lifted her onto the counter, stepping between her thighs. “Please tell me you have nothing on underneath this dress. I need to be inside of you. Right now.”

Her smile was radiant. Palming her thigh, Zane ran his hand up her leg until his fingers found the smooth, hairless lips of her pussy.

“Yes, Zane. Please.”

They were at least on the same page. He knew he shouldn’t do this here. He should carry her to her bed, make love to her properly, but he couldn’t wait. With hurried movements, he freed his erection from his jeans, sliding back between her legs. The counter was too high to make this possible, so he lifted her in his arms, forcing her legs around his waist and sinking his cock into her without further ado.

Turning, he backed her against the kitchen wall, holding her tightly, unable to move as her wet heat pulled him deeper. He groaned, dropping his head to her shoulder, burying his face in her neck as he inhaled her pure, fresh scent.

When her fingers slid into his hair, holding him closer, Zane began to press deeper, barely able to pull back thanks to how close their bodies were, but that was ok. He didn’t even need to move. Her body could probably milk a release from him just like this.

“Look at me, Zane.”

He lifted his head reluctantly, staring into those bottomless whiskey brown eyes. It was then that he saw his future flash before his eyes. Everything revolved around this woman. Every minute of happiness and pain had been spent getting to this moment in his life. This was all for him. She was everything.

“Tell me you love me,” she whispered.

Zane hitched her a little higher, thrusting in deep as he did. When she moaned, her eyes closing briefly, Zane waited until she opened them again. “I love you, Vanessa Carmichael. I love you with everything I am.”

V started pulling him closer by pressing her ankles against his naked ass, and he gave her what she was asking for. With deep, slow thrusts, Zane made love to her. It didn’t matter that they were almost fully dressed in her kitchen. This was what making love was all about. Two souls coming together, accepting one another in a way that had never happened before. For either of them.

“I. Love. You.” Zane punctuated each word with a hard thrust. His release was barreling down on him, faster than he expected. “V! Oh, God, baby.”

“I love you, Zane,” V exclaimed, her voice strained, her legs tightening around him.

V’s pussy clamped down on him, hard. Her body milking him until his release was inevitable. Pounding into her once, twice, and one final time, Zane gave himself over to her. Not just his body, or his release. He gave every part of himself to her right in that instant.

♀♂

After the two of them cleaned up, V forced Zane to sit down at her kitchen table. She’d been cooking almost since the second she walked into her house and was looking forward to a few quiet moments.

Instead of sitting in her car panicking, she forced her brain to ignore the pressing thoughts and her body to block out the overwhelming fear that she was consumed with. Once inside, she locked everything up, made sure there weren’t any notes on her refrigerator door and she’d taken a quick shower.

Since then, she had worked in the kitchen, cooking until she didn’t know what else she could possibly make. It was time she started moving forward. Just like Zane was. She had to stop living in the past, and although she knew these panic attacks weren’t entirely at bay, V was ready to rid herself of them. Counseling, as Greyson had suggested, was inevitable. While she’d been making grilled cheese – the comfort food her mother had always fed her in times like this – she’d called the number on the card Greyson had left on her refrigerator. She had her first appointment tomorrow.

While the two of them ate, V explained all of this to Zane, and he asked if he could go with her. She’d agreed to allow him to go along, but she wanted to go the first time by herself. As much as she wanted to lean on him, V knew she had to do this for herself as much as for him. He deserved for her to be whole again, just like he was.

They were doing the dishes together when there was a knock on her front door and V’s knees actually gave out. Had Zane not been standing there with her, she’d have fallen to the floor. So much for thinking ahead. Clearly she was still suffering from paranoia. It only took a second for her to get her legs back under her and she headed to the front door, not two steps behind Zane. She wanted to pull him back, put herself between what danger may lurk on the other side of her front door, but he didn’t allow it.