Heather London: The Hardest Part

I sat there and stared at my new name, still wondering if I would be strong enough to do this—start over and make a new life—knowing in the back of my mind Jake would always be out there. I knew I was his obsession—his everything—and he would never stop looking for me.

JAKE

AN ANNOYING, high-pitched ringing sound woke me up. Damn phone, I really hated that ringtone. I swung out my arm and patted the nightstand next to me. The reason for calling me so early in the morning better be a fucking good one or I was going to kill the person on the other end of the line.

"What is it?" I growled, pressing the phone against my ear.

"Sorry to call so early, sir, but Emily…" There was a long pause. Just hearing her name and then that long, terrifying silence sent my heart pounding against my chest. "She's gone, sir." Tom's voice came back on the line. He tried to keep his voice even, but I could easily hear the fear in it.

"What?" I asked, throwing the covers off me. I swung my legs around to the floor and jumped out of bed. "What do you mean she's gone ?" I was already moving around the hotel room, gathering all my shit and throwing it in my suitcase.

"I don't know the specifics, sir. I just know she's gone. That's all Mike told me."

I gripped the phone in my hands so hard that I could hear the plastic cracking. The dumb bitch was trying to leave me again. I told her the last time that I'd kill her if she tried.

"Where's Mike? I want to talk to him."

"He's not in the penthouse, sir. He's securing the building and checking the casino's surveillance videos. He's also been talking with the security at the hotel to see if anyone saw her leave the building."

I closed my eyes and tried to control my anger. I wanted to reserve that for later when we found her. "I'm on my way home. I want some answers when I get there, and tell Mike I want to know what the fuck he was doing when he was the one I left in charge of taking care of her."

"Yes, sir. I'll tell him, sir."

I hung up and threw the phone against the wall. It burst apart, the pieces scattering across the carpet below. It only took me five minutes to be dressed and downstairs. Rico was waiting for me in the lobby, avoiding eye contact.

"I need a new goddamn phone," I said, storming past him. He followed quickly after me. "Have you heard from Mike?" I asked through clenched teeth.

"No, I haven't spoken to him. Tom says he's been down talking with the hotel security and police. Everyone’s doing what they can to find her, sir, but there's no sign of her on any of the tapes."

"I don't want to hear they're trying. I want to hear they've succeeded. How hard can it be? She's not that smart and she has no money. How far could she have gotten?"

The flight home took forever and the ride from the airport to the hotel took even longer. My eyes were focused on the bright city lights as we drove up the strip, but my mind was moving a mile a minute, trying to figure out where she could've gone. I couldn’t live without her. Even though we’d only been together for a few years, the world didn’t seem right until she came into my life. I tried so hard to be all she ever needed. To give her everything. To make sure she never wanted for anything. I tried so hard, and I know sometimes I messed up. I’m not sure how many times I promised her I would change, that I would get better, but every time I told her that, I would screw up again. She would make me so mad, and I couldn’t control the things I did to her or said to her. There was a rage inside of me that I couldn’t control. But I felt like I had to be that way. It was the only way to be respected and feared in this town. I had to be ruthless and demanding. I had to hold a high standard. If I didn’t, I would be seen as weak, and I couldn’t let that happen.

It’s not that I liked seeing Emily hurt or in pain. It actually killed me on the inside. When I would snap out of my rage and realize what I’d done, I couldn’t stop begging for her forgiveness. I’d promise her it would never happen again. I’d tell her I’d get help, but by the time her tears dried up and she told me she forgave me, those thoughts would vanish until the next time I hurt her.

We pulled up to the hotel. I could see the front of the building was covered with people in uniform. Great, the last fucking thing I wanted was a bunch of cops roaming around, regardless if I owned half of them. I'd be sure to let Mike know how much I appreciated this. I left him in charge. I told him to take care of her. He promised me he wouldn't let her out of his sight. How hard could it be? I was only gone one day.

I took the elevators up to the penthouse level and found the hall swarmed with police. Mike was standing outside the door, talking to Detective Miller. My blood boiled. I hated Miller. He was a straight-laced cop, never one to break the rules, no matter how much I offered to pay him. Mike saw me and started to walk toward me, leaving Miller behind.

"What the fuck happened?" I asked him when he got within a foot of me.

"We're doing everything we can to find her. The cops are treating it as a kidnapping. They're asking lots of questions, wanting to know if you have any enemies. They think she may be used for some type of ransom."

He and I both knew I had a lot of enemies, but my gut told me that's not what happened. This wasn't a kidnapping. I was pretty sure she ran away, as she had tried it a handful of times before. The only question was how did she get away without anyone seeing her? In the times before, she’d always left some clue, a way for me to track her down.

"Tell me what happened," I demanded.

"The last time I checked on her, she was in here asleep," Mike said.

"And what time was that?" I glared at him.

"About midnight."

I shouldered past him and walked into the penthouse, heading toward the bedroom. Mike followed a few steps behind.

"And when did you notice she was missing?" The right side of the bed, the side where Emily slept, was unmade.

"When I came back an hour later, she was gone." I glanced back at him, noticing he refused to meet my eyes. Either he was ashamed that he didn't do the simplest task I asked of him, or he was keeping something from me.

"No one saw her leave?" I asked.

Mike shook his head, still staring into the empty space beside me. A feeling in my gut told me he was lying to me. Could he really be that stupid? He knew what I could do to him.

"Well, she couldn't have just disappeared." I seethed. "She couldn't have avoided every single camera in the building. She's definitely not brave enough to leave on her own. She has nothing, no one." My voice rose with each word.

Mike's jaw clenched and he held his head even higher. "We're still trying to figure it out," he said, looking serious, stoic, and professional, like he always did.

I took a step closer to him, coming within an inch of his face. "What is it that you're not telling me? Did one of your guys help her? Did you help her? You wouldn't have just let her walk out the front of the building, would you?"

He didn't flinch or move a muscle. "Of course not, sir. I'm not sure what happened exactly, but I promise you I'll get to the bottom of it."

Anger erupted inside of me. I slammed my fist through the wall next to his head. Pain radiated all the way up my arm. I looked behind Mike and saw Detective Miller standing there, eying me warily.

Flexing my injured hand, I leaned forward and whispered in Mike's ear, "Find her, Mike. Find her and bring her back to me or I'll kill you and everyone you love."

He didn't even blink an eye. He gave me a single, sharp nod.

I took a few steps back and walked past Miller, into the living room. Exhausted, I fell to the couch and looked around. The room was neat and clean, just like I'd left it. It was only missing one very important piece. The girl I loved more than anything in the world. The girl I would do anything for. I'd given her a new life. I'd given her a home. I'd given her everything.